Honestly I know how easy it is as a jungler to completely tunnel on your farming and miss out on enemy laners. It actually takes a high degree of concentration to countergank properly, and ganking isn't always ideal.
The only thing that truly bothers me is when I see a lane getting ganked somewhere and my jungler doesn't do anything to respond. No moves towards the enemy jungle, no ganking another lane, nothing. They just sit there and hope that our lane doesn't die to what may be a well executed gank.
Fact is, some champions have power timings where death is almost unavoidable. Laners are at the mercy of certain junglers. If rengar ganks for orianna post level 6, mids gonna die. If lee sin or kha zix gets lanterned in by thresh, there's a high chance that bot's going to get killed. There's not a whole lot you can do as a laner to prevent stuff like that, and it's especially true if your jungler isn't getting deep wards on the enemy while they farm and keeping tabs on their buffs.
There's a lot as a laner that frustrates me about junglers. Choosing not to gank isn't necessarily the issue, it's choosing to do nothing that bothers me. You signed up for the role that interacts strategically with the enemy team, rather than mechanically. Do your damn job.