Idea for the Best Possible Braum Skin

Ever since I first saw Braum in the "Trials of the Poro" video and the in-game art, I Had this idea for a skin for him stuck in my head and I need to tell you guys about it.

Manly Braum.

This skin will be manlier than Gragas Esq. Manlier than Gentleman Cho'Gath. Manlier than Brolaf.

Manlier than freaking Armor of the Fifth Age Taric.

His body will be changed simply. He's just normal Braum with thick hair on his head (optional; baldness doesn't reduce manliness), thick mustache, chest hair, brown pants, and heavy boots. And real men don't need shields, so remove that.

His passive will display a mustache (yes, a mustache) instead of the normal icon for the number of stacks. At max stacks, the target gets too overcome with manliness and is stunned for the duration.

His Q will be him removing his mustache (which immediately grows back because of his powers of manliness) and throws that at his enemies and tangles them, slowing them down.

His W will have him jump to an ally and wrap them in a protective mustache that grants resistances for the duration.

His E has 3 possibilities. #1: His chest expands, creating the protective shield that defends him and his allies. #2: Braum channels his awesome manliness into his mustache, making it grow into a massive protective shield, which he can take parts off of for his other abilities if need be. #3: He channels his awesome manliness into his chest, causing the hair there to grow into a thick protective shield for him and his allies. All three of these ideas are valid, just use your good judgement to decide which is manliest.

His ultimate can be him taking off his mustache (which grows back immediately) and slamming it into the ground, causing it to grow forward and force itself violently out of the ground, knocking enemies in the path of the ability up. Enemies in the zones are then tangled by the mustache vines growing sticking out of the ground for the duration.

His autoattack animation can be him punching enemies in a manly manner, or him clobbering enemies with his mustache (his mustache uses the powers of manliness to extend forth and swing upon the unworthy).

His emotes can be references to Overly Manly Man or other manly things/epitomes of manliness. Like bacon!

Pliz, Riot, make this skin happen. Me and a lot of other people that want to play Braum would love this and pay for this. It could be a legendary skin!