The Final Words of a Banned Player

Hopefully this is not a rant and does not come in bad taste. I had sometime to blow off steam and sort of gather myself together after receiving a permanent ban from Riot Games, for an issue I don't care to discuss, but would like to provide some insight on how a player behaves in the game and how the game's situation should be taken into account.

To start, I have been playing League since around Season 4, maybe late season 3 but I was not very active. I fell in love with the game we all play from now and then but when season 5 hit, I began to play a late to catch up with former relationships I had made in high school that I couldn't really experience currently due to being thousands of miles away at university. League became the platform I could have to talk to people or play with people who I knew I couldn't see for a long time. I became emotionally tied to the game, feeling the need that I should play nearly everyday just so I could re-kindle this bonds and it did create an obsession.

This obsession is what made me continue to put hours into the game, hours that took away from friends, from family, from school and most importantly from myself. I was a different person. I don't play League necessarily as I blame Video Games. Video Games are my alcohol. It helps me get my mind off of things, helps me cope, even helps me do dumb things. But at times, it makes a 'monster' (a direct quote from a player that sticks with me to this day).

This 'monster' is what I hope Riot Games and may be more researchers look into. The 'monster' did not come out for having a bad day, or even a bad game. It came out with time. I did a self research into how my personality changed throughout games and most of the time, the more toxic behavior or actions would start between 25-30 minutes and continue at steady pace throughout the game. This is something I kind of found interesting because I asked a small sample, 2-3 players, who I had known had toxic behavior and they were around the same.

My reasoning into thinking that the longer the game, the more toxic behavior is due to the game competitiveness itself. It only makes sense to think this as sort of the "stuck on an island" mentality where the longer you are stuck with the same people, the more irritated you can get. Especially with the pressure of a competitive environment, the amount of pressure and adrenaline/testosterone flowing could really only lead to a blow up inside or outside of the game. Even if the muting of a players, the chat still goes through and has lead to multiple of my own personal reports but probably to others out there.

The emotional release is needed for a human being and League of Legends doesn't really have a way to do it unless you burst in real life. While League of Legends players can say "just mute chat" I wish Riot would have a setting to allow for chat to not be readable if all muted or a different way to message.

While I may never play League of Legends again, I can appreciate the fun I have had with this game and the memories I will have playing it. I hope Riot Games really looks into helping the player avoid toxicity, rather than only promoting ways to get it banned. I hope this message doesn't come with dictate and hope people can learn from my past mistakes.