Telling people to "kys" needs to stop

æsthetically·May 31, 2017·46 votes·2,540 views

I recently played a match where I was AD Kennen in the jungle just to try it out. It was going okay until my grandparents came over to greet my family; I quickly told my team that I would be gone for 5 min more or less because my grandparents were here. Anyways, I came back after 10 min, apologized for being gone for so long, and I promptly witnessed our top laner telling me to "kys and your grandparents". This behavior needs to stop; people seem to think that it is a light humor but to people who have lost close ones from suicide it is incredibly infuriating and depressing. Maybe that reaction is just my experience but my point still stands that you should not be telling people to kys.

tl;dr don't tell people to kys

131 Comments

CochoJun 1, 201723 votes

tl;dr "I afk'd and my team got mad at me"

JoxcabJun 1, 201712 votes

That's still not an excuse for that kind of behavior.

CochoJun 1, 201712 votes

I'd report both and move on. Nobody is better here, but I'd rather take the guy who didn't afk.

It is like attempting to rob someone's house, then sewing them because their dog attacked you.

SecondAirbaneJun 1, 20173 votes

afks and trolls are the worst imo IDGAF what somebody says about me unless they're bronze trash thinking they're better than me ill put them right back into bronze free of cost

JoxcabJun 1, 20173 votes

Then you get punished for intentionally throwing? Your attitude is even worse than those you complain about.

KartagiaJun 1, 20176 votes

I disagree. Real life takes higher priority. This is one main reason I have tried to tell our Riot devs they should make the game reward calculation accurate by taking afkers into account. Thus the result would be just afking player taking more LP and MMR hit than rest of his team as he made game harder. No bans, as he had reason for it. And he said he was sorry for it. Team could adapt as well they could.

This additional loss of MMR and LP and reduced loss for team mates would be really good, positive, and MMR math upholding way to do it. Punishment is for harass or violet going afk which is different thing.

DeathBurstJun 1, 20172 votes

You report an AFK, you don't tell them "kys", or any other insult/mean comment for that matter. You don't reply to bad behavior with even worse behavior, that's not an excuse.

Jo0oJun 1, 201716 votes

The use of "kys" isn't right, but shit, neither is dipping away for ten minutes. Those minutes are extremely valuable to your team, and giving them up could easily have cost the game.

RainfallJun 1, 20172 votes

everytime someone hits me with the CY@ i hit him back with the KY$

Jo0oJun 1, 20173 votes

I wish I was as edgy as you.

RainfallJun 1, 20173 votes

you can never reach my level of edgyness. i use yasuo quotes in real life.

IcyPepperJun 1, 20179 votes

While I agree with that "KYS" is not okay, I don't understand why we need fifty threads about it.

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20173 votes

More awareness?

SecondAirbaneJun 1, 20174 votes

awareness wont stop people from saying it

La Belle SauvageJun 1, 20171 votes

Disagree, Ignoring an issue like this is never a solution.

Velzard of KozJun 1, 20172 votes

No he's right.

In case someone is "edgy" and dumb enough to say kys, do you actually think they will read these posts and reiterate over their behaviour? Especially since majority of such threads just tell them they are jerks. No.

The awareness we are talking about is relatively same group of people already knowing it shouldn't be said circlejerking around how bad it is, farming upvotes.

How much awareness is enough? There's post like this every now and then and it doesn't seem it would be enough as then there are more posts like this.

And you immediately jumped into "ignoring is not a solution"? Who says he ignores that? Maybe he just uses an actual solution - reporting the player. Going every now and then to Boards to make topic like this for the expected upvotes is barely doing anything extra. If you want to rant, fine, but interpreting his attitude like "ignoring the solution" is very ignorant, some of us just know what tools we have to fight against such behaviour and use them without announcing it every week.

ZelorxonJun 1, 20173 votes

Mmmh, 50 threads of kys... Man, you're into some kinky shit i'm telling ya.

Troll for TrumpJun 1, 20179 votes

Expecting people not to get pissed for you wasting an accumulated 40 minutes of their lives (and quite likely 80-160 minutes, given that a 10 minute afk would probably lose the game)

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20178 votes

Expressing anger is fine. Telling people to kys is not.

Troll for TrumpJun 1, 20173 votes

It isn't though; not according to Rito.

No retaliation (negative responces to AFK is retaliation of sorts, adding fuel to the fire, etc.) No negative attitude No verbal abuse No harassment

You are supposed to suck up and deal with the fact someone just wasted your free time.

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20176 votes

You can say "I'm angry that you were afk," and nobody will report you. You actually can express anger without being offensive.

Maybe you could say "I'm tilted from you afking"? These things aren't offensive but they get the point across.

Troll for TrumpJun 1, 20171 votes

They don't get your point across because they don't show anger.

When someone is angry, they will never be rational.

Most often, people will say something passive-aggressive.

Before, that wasn't punishable. Now it is.

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20175 votes

They very explicitly show anger.

Staying in control of your emotions is an important skill to learn. Lots of people can think rationally while angry.

No, only aggressive chat is punishable still.

Troll for TrumpJun 1, 20172 votes

They very explicitly show anger.

They really don't. Saying "I'm angry" doesn't show anger. At all.

Staying in control of your emotions is an important skill to learn. Lots of people can think rationally while angry.

If you're thinking rationally while angry, you aren't actually angry. Most likely annoyed, but not angry.

No, only aggressive chat is punishable still.

All angry chat is aggressive.

LauchmelderJun 1, 20173 votes

"Dude that call was shyte." Is a basic statement of a call gone wrong.

If it would be punishable, as you think, I wouldn't be playing this game. I would have gotten restricted long ago.

If someone says: "Shit man, was you AFK'ing really neccessary? It fucked us over hard." I don't even call that toxic, it's an honest question.

Troll for TrumpJun 1, 20172 votes

You don't find it offensive, but some people will. Riot caters to those people, because they want the game to be enjoyable for everyone, meaning the system adapts to the people with thin skin.

So, yes, those comments can be counted as offensive and can get you punished.

What should happen is that you have no fear of being punished for typing those types of comments. That is not the case.

People don't say "Shit man, was you AFK'ing really neccessary? It fucked us over hard." When they're angry. They'd say that if they were calm.

La Belle SauvageJun 1, 20171 votes

I absolutely can be rational and be angry, what you refer to is about control, which is something different from anger.

I can be angry and still be in control of my actions.

Troll for TrumpJun 1, 20172 votes

You cannot be angry and rational.

If you're angry, you're irrational. If you're rational, you aren't angry.

You can be angry and be in control of your actions, they just won't be rational ones, because, when angry, you aren't thinking rationally.

Billybaroo2314Jun 2, 20171 votes

To me it sounds like YOU can't be rational and angry. Try a few self help books. You will learn.

Troll for TrumpJun 2, 20172 votes

People can't be angry and rational. They are opposite things.

Try a few self help books. You will learn.

Pretentious.

MajkiJun 1, 20171 votes

I like you. Lulu

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20172 votes

Chilllll you're making me blush

Wiggle Dat ButtJun 1, 20178 votes

Oh here we go, another case of entitled kids. Let's pamper the offended baby who doesn't give a shit about the other 9 people in the game that HE que'd up for. Let's wag our finger at the guy who tells this kid how it is. This generation coming up is a bunch of morons and needs a huge reality check if they ever get a job.

Pater GascoigneJun 1, 20175 votes

"tell him how it is" ...? That he should commit suicide, sudoku himself out of this world because he had the nerve to afk for a few minutes to greet his family members? I know there are some insane people out there, but are you for real? Having people afk sucks, but at least he had the courtesy of informing his teammates and he even came back. I had some people who afked because "noob teammates" or "im hungry". And they never come back.

This community is terrible because they don't treat this game as "our team vs their team" but rather as " me vs 9 enemies". The 0/3 top lane that gets camped by the enemy jungler? Sabotaging my game. The jungler that doesnt camp my lane? Boosted noob. The guy who goes afk due to private reasons? He better kills himself after the match. Seriously, take a step back and remind yourself that those players are just other human beings trying to habe fun in a videogame.

La Belle SauvageJun 1, 20175 votes

It's not about entitlement, it about decency. The AFK was wrong I agree.

The "generation" argument is old, weak and tiresome, and wrong.

I'm a 40 year old adult and I agree that Kill yourself should stop.

LexyyJun 1, 20178 votes

Yes it needs to stop.

What also needs to stop is people afking

CrimsonDawn77Jun 1, 20177 votes

I agree totally.

However you also shouldn't afk. Riot needs to do more about afkers and that fact that afks are so common leads some players to be toxic.

AeszarckJun 1, 20177 votes

{quoted}

I agree totally.

However you also shouldn't afk. Riot needs to do more about afkers and that fact that afks are so common leads some players to be toxic.

I think this is a situation where real life takes priority over League. He/she might not see his grandparents often.

CrimsonDawn77Jun 1, 20179 votes

That is exactly the attitude that afkers need to change. I wish riot would be harsher on this.

If they aren't certain that in the next 20-50 minutes they wont be in a situation where life must take priority over league they shouldn't que. Their time doesn't become more important then other people because of things that happen in their life. If people were to play with that idea then there's a good chance that most games would have an afk in it.

Afkers are especially bad when they ruin games for people who have limited time and often don't play because they don't risk maybe having to afk.

AeszarckJun 1, 20172 votes

{quoted}

That is exactly the attitude that afkers need to change. I wish riot would be harsher on this.

If they aren't certain that in the next 20-50 minutes they wont be in a situation where life must take priority over league they shouldn't que. Their time doesn't become more important then other people because of things that happen in their life. If people were to play with that idea then there's a good chance that most games would have an afk in it.

Afkers are especially bad when they ruin games for people who have limited time and often don't play because they don't risk maybe having to afk.

It could have been an unexpected visit. He could just not have known the time they were coming. I remember one time my mom was feeling down so she was just lying down in the family room on her yoga mat. While I was in the middle of a League match I heard her faintly calling my name. I brushed it off because it was a teamfight, then realized that she didn't sound normal so I told my team I would be right back and went to her. I then got my dad, he took her to the hospital, and it turned out she had a bad urinary tract infection. I got back on League while they were driving and finished the match, but I felt really bad for not responding to my mom sooner. I also felt bad for not being with my mom while she went through this disease. Do you think I should have finished the match before responding to my mom?

CrimsonDawn77Jun 1, 20176 votes

If the grandparents were an unexpected visit he shouldn't have left, or should have taken a minute and a half to greet them after warning his team he was going afk for 1.5 minutes. He should also have told his parents that he can't afk and explain it to them, and be sure that they wont make him afk before queing. If it was a sports game or another irl activity it would be considered highly rude to leave and ruin the game. Amateur sport leagues would kick you out for doing that repeatedly. People's time shouldn't be treated differently just because this is an on line activity.

In that case it is ethical to prioritize your mother's health over a game. The person afking because of their grandparents is entirely different. The convenience and enjoyment of seeing their grandparents (and probably not facing social pressure and backlash for being 'rude' and 'not putting your game down') is no more important then the convenience and enjoyment one person gets out of playing the game without afks, never mind that being the case with 8 other people.

Serious health issues and mere enjoyment and convenience can't even be compared. In the case of health issues with your mother your time still isn't any more important than anyone else's, rather its that her health is an obligation stronger then your obligation to people over a game.

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20177 votes

This is a game, dude. There are already systems in place to punish afks. There is no need to further punish afks by being toxic to them.

CrimsonDawn77Jun 1, 20172 votes

Additional deterrence is needed. There are lots of afks sometimes, they cannot all be genuinely totally unforeseeable events that might happen ~1% of the time if you are careful enough.
I'm not sure if you have witnessed it, but when I was in elo hell it was a huge problem. It's especially bad for people like me who didn't play much because they might have to afk, but still afks in as much as 30% of the few games they played.

Ruining someone else's activity and wasting their time doesn't become any more acceptable because this is a game. The courtesy owed to people isn't contingent upon the value you place on a game.

I don't know if you read my original post or not but I also agreed that you shouldn't be toxic to them. I'm am only more concerned about their team who has to deal with an afk and then witness verbal abuse being thrown back and forth.

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20173 votes

There isn't any way to prove why someone was afk. Therefore we should follow the guidelines riot has in place already because they allow for unforseen events while punishing consistent afks.

CrimsonDawn77Jun 1, 20171 votes

I agree with what you said in principle, we should let the system do its job. But that doesn't mean we should blindly accept that the system is working as it should when there is lots of evidence to the contrary.

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20172 votes

True, so what evidence do you have that the system is not working? Keep in mind that just seeing afks or toxicity in your games is not evidence that the system doesn't punish consistent afks or toxicity. To be honest I'm not even sure how you could find evidence but if you can and show me, more power to you.

AeroWaffleJun 1, 20178 votes

The issue is, it's next to impossible to be absolutely sure that the next 20-50 min are interrupted. It's still going to happen even when I have nothing planned for an hour.

For example, A neighbor may knock on my door requesting something (like his car wont start and he needs it jump-started). I'm not about to tell the neighbor, "Sorry, but my league of legends game is more important to me than you missing work".

That's what leavebuster is for in the first place. To punish those who leave/afk beyond the rare occurrence. Yes, it sucks for those 4 other players, yes it's understandable that they're upset about having their game tanked. But insulting someone for afk'ing/leaving does nothing to help the situation. They are already going to be handled by the system.

CrimsonDawn77Jun 1, 20175 votes

It's very difficult to be absolutely sure, but it isn't that difficult to have a very high level of certainty. If you are that certain then the odds of something coming up are tiny.

The way things are at the moment, there are many people who afk because they prefer to play for example 8 more games a week even though doing so makes them afk in several of them. The problem is that leavebuster is very lenient, especially the first tear punishments. I personally know people who are often in and out of priority que because they afk or have internet that needs fixing.

SnakDatSmilesBakJun 1, 20174 votes

Riot can be harsher but real life doesn't pander to our whims. Things happen that we can't always control, but we can always control how we react to afks.

CrimsonDawn77Jun 1, 20172 votes

If riot was harsher people would be more cautious before queing. And yes I totally agree you shouldn't be abusive to afks.