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Attack of the Demon Poros

Riot·11/17/2016, 7:03:42 PM·13 votes·113,704 views

In the back of a dimly lit tavern, a 20-sided die soars across a wooden table. As the die lands, four figures lean in to examine the results of the roll...

Ah, a bad roll! The path is blocked and a horde of demon poros attacks our party. Can we survive this onslaught of hellish beasts or will we succumb to their furious might?

Not a problem. I drop an Acceleration Gate and blast ‘em with a Hyper Charge. Our future will be bright!

Come on, man -- try to stay in character. We’ve talked about this already.

 

*Incomprehensible chime*

 

What did it just say?

 

It wishes to know if that last part should be included in the song it is composing about our adventures.

*Incomprehensible chime*

 

It also wishes to tell you that demon poros are too scary, and could we change to candy poros instead?

Uh okay, I guess... Bard Bard, raise your quill and bear witness! Let us commence battle with the savage *sigh* candy poros.

I know how to handle these creatures!

 

No. Please don’t--

 

I drop an Acceleration Gate and blast ‘em with a Hyper Charge. Face the future!

 

*Writes something down*

 

Do not put any of this in the song!

 

*Confused chime*

 

It says that--

 

I DON’T CARE WHAT IT SAYS! *Rolls die* Rocks fall; everyone dies. I’m going home.

 

*Sad chime*



Write your own legend with Sejuani Dawnchaser, Bard Bard, and Jayce Brighthammer, now dungeon crawling through the League store for 750 RP each. Descend into darkness with Karthus Lightsbane for 975 RP.

 

Dungeon Crawler Set - 3225 RP (5868 RP if you need the champions)

Available until November 21, 2016 at 23:59 PT

  • Karthus Lightsbane
  • Bard Bard
  • Sejuani Dawnchaser
  • Jayce the Bright Hammer
  • Karthus - 25% off
  • Bard - 25% off
  • Sejuani - 25% off
  • Jayce - 25% off

320 Comments

º LB º11/17/2016, 7:28:49 PM255 votes

Viktor Muwahahaha! Jayce, I finally got you cornered! I've imprisoned your police friends Caitlyn Vi so no one could help Piltover. There's nothing you or anyone can do to stop me! Hand over the Power Reactor and watch my glorious evolution unfold! Jayce ... Viktor ??? Jayce I drop an Acceleration Gate and blast ‘em with a Hyper Charge. Face the future!

Well Dressed Ice11/17/2016, 8:42:24 PM71 votes

Karthus speaks Bard!

LeeSin2UrHeartt11/17/2016, 7:31:58 PM69 votes

Elder dragon spawns top lane, i'll get the rumor spreading asap [slayer-pantheon-thumbs]

Pixii Bomb11/17/2016, 7:43:17 PM64 votes

Sejuani How is Bard JUST NOW getting a Bard skin? Jayce Bard doesn't have skin? Karthus No no, Bard is his name. And Riot gave him some clothes to dress him up like it's his day job. But, you know, he doesn't actually sing in taverns or anything. Bard You mean... like how Jhin is a psychopath, and doesn't actually grant wishes?

Riotinvinciblemoon11/17/2016, 11:04:12 PM52 votes

Hey all! We made a mistake earlier and listed Karthus as a 750 RP skin. He's actually a 975 RP skin. We've updated the article to reflect his true price. Sorry for the confusion.

TheCowSaysMoo11/17/2016, 8:34:19 PM35 votes

Who Remembers Dungeons & Demacians

US NA LCS Pigeon11/17/2016, 11:49:34 PM24 votes

Jayce what did you roll? Taliyah um, hold on a sec... Taliyah 18? Jayce 18. hm. okay. (checks rulebook) nods Jayce with the last ounce of your mana, you charge up everything you've got in your rocks. pshhh pshh pshh, the earth around you rumbles, fault lines open up and emanate from where you stand. the monster you're chasing notices what you're doing. he tries to sprint away, out of range. he even dodges a few with his Korean Juking traits. but it's too late. grins Taliyah oh my god... Jayce your rocks fly at him like they were shot out of an Acceleration Gate. the furry little devil tries his best to squirm out of it, but stands no chance. the first rock smashes into the side of his head, blasting him and pinning him against the trees like a well-placed frag grenade. he lets out a horrific Yordle cry, like nothing you've ever heard. like what the beast of the apocalypse would sound like when giving birth to a horde of demons as its birth canal is torn apart. Taliyah ... holy shit, that's pretty awesome. Jayce your second and third rocks act like steam-powered giant robot fists pummeling into the poor little creature, as it bleeds from every possible orifice, and then a few more that you didn't know even existed. as it bleeds out, a mess of blood and intestines sprawled out over the roots of its deathbed tree, it cries out for its mother, begging you to spare its life, shows you a picture of its girlfriend in a firefighter uniform, tells you it will never place another toxic mushroom in another bush you want to enter again. it tells you it never meant to hurt anyone. Taliyah oh dear god. Jayce i only have one question for you, Laura Bailey. Taliyah ?!!?!! Jayce ...how do you wanna do this?

Raynor111111/17/2016, 8:20:17 PM24 votes

Must get BardBard, if only for the sake of BardBard

Yea Im The Best11/17/2016, 8:19:02 PM21 votes

Really no one noticed? That it says "I drop an Acceleration Gate and blast ‘em with a Hyper Charge" Jayce's Q is shock blast not hyper charge. XD Rito doesn't even know their own champions.

Miss Anne11/17/2016, 9:45:11 PM20 votes

A terrifying Riot initiated nerf is coming, what do you do? Jayce I drop an Acceleration Gate and blast 'em with a Hyper Charge. Face the future!

rolls die it works.

OWL CORVO PhD11/17/2016, 9:47:32 PM19 votes

and now we wait for Yorick's new skin......

Stars Shaper11/17/2016, 9:39:23 PM18 votes

Lets make: "I drop an Acceleration get and blast 'em with an Hyper Charge. Face the future!" a meme please :D

Singularitea11/17/2016, 8:32:52 PM17 votes

karthus looks like vladimir and leblanc had a baby

Alto Saxophone11/17/2016, 9:24:44 PM15 votes

Karthus You All Will Die Caitlyn Oh #@!% Poppy GG Bard God damn it Enemy Quadra Kill Khazix item 3814 Not Even Close BB

Ralanr11/17/2016, 7:47:06 PM15 votes

I love that Sejuani is the DM.

Lord Zenith11/17/2016, 8:54:51 PM11 votes

Eh, I don't really like these skins, there's only one thing to do about that. Drop an Acceleration Gate and blast 'em with a Hyper Charge! xD

But jokes aside, all these skins look pretty cool and the story just sold 'em for me. I'll definitely be picking up Bard Bard sometime within the next few days. Good work on these ones, rito. :P

Tsundokuu11/17/2016, 7:26:04 PM8 votes

This post says Karthus Lightsbane is 750RP but in the store it's 975RP

Ego The Raptor11/17/2016, 8:07:55 PM3 votes

wait a second.... 750 * 4 = 3000 (if you have all the champions and buy the skins one by one**)

but 3225 the pack of skins without the champions .-.U soo 225rp more for less clicks or what? [zombie-brand-mindblown]