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Seeking Advice about my Horrible Attitude

da Woxy·2/1/2015, 9:32:31 AM·2 votes·2,026 views

I'm looking for advice or guidance about my attitude when playing League. I've been playing for about a year and half now, and my attitude has gotten progressively worse. I get unbelievably angry when I play now, to the point of going into a fit of rage then ignoring advice, and losing all logic/reason. My anger ends up turning into depression and sometimes drives me to tears. This depression can last for hours.

When I play a game i'm already nervous from champ select. It gets worse as the game goes on. It causes my hands to shake and I start making nervous mistakes in lane. I get very high strung and I talk a lot to myself during the match (in a panicked sort of way). The feeling of adrenaline makes me very uncomfortable. I don't start flipping out, though, until I make a mistake and I get a comment from teammates.

That's not the only thing that gets to me, though. I often play with a team of close friends and I still get angry and end up rage-quitting or feeding. The adrenaline gets to me in these instances and multiple small mistakes here can cause me to rage, even knowing I won't get a malicious comment. This has even happened in games we were clearly winning.

I've left so many Skype calls and games to the point where some of my friends don't even want to play League with me anymore. Every single time I think I have the courage to play normal matches I end up getting extremely angry almost immediately (within 2 or 3 games). This has forced me to play bots almost exclusively, even ARAM is too much for me now.

It sounds like I just shouldn't be playing competitive games, but it hasn't always been this way. I used to be able to play all day long without incident. I can try muting players or getting rid of chat window but I don't think that will help the stress/adrenaline go away. Is there anyone out there that has a similar problem? Or anyone that can offer some advice? I really love everything about this game, and I can never completely stay away.

7 Comments

Tiax2/1/2015, 10:00:33 AM3 votes

Stop caring so much about winning or losing that one game. If it's norms just have fun, if it's ranked try to learn the game. You are consciously choosing to make every game high stakes in your mind and you happen to be one of the many people who don't respond well to that stress. If teamates and friends worsen this play by yourself and /mute all for a while and see if you can train yourself out of it.

fdissht2/1/2015, 9:56:14 AM2 votes

http://boards.na.leagueoflegends.com/en/c/tips-tricks/EOlNU6Np-how-to-get-better-attitude http://boards.na.leagueoflegends.com/en/c/tips-tricks/JcOghQX4-i-want-to-enjoy-playing-lol http://boards.na.leagueoflegends.com/en/c/tips-tricks/dOiwEU8U-panic-attacks-just-from-being-in-lane

Faith Breaker2/2/2015, 12:56:28 AM1 votes

Give me your email address if you wish. I can custom write a general warning type of email to you. I'll write it up and word it loosely about negative attitude detected on your account and give a few pointers on how to avoid further reports and a warning your account is nearing suspension status. Me and a few friends have been doing this since mid last year and it's not only amusing but effective.

A 14 day ban is ouchies. Ranked restrictions hurt. Chat bans are actually useful. Imposing these restrictions on yourself and your friends helps provide meaningful motivation and feed back without the actual looming threat of losing your account. Take a break. Enjoy those bot games. Try team builder. Next time you make a mistake, ask your team mates for advice. Ask them "Hey guys what'd I just do wrong? I thought ect" Let them your team KNOW "Hey guys , I'm on tilt right now and I'm real sorry if I snap, please bear with me"

Things like that DO make a difference, you may be happy to see suprisingly how many team mates will stop and take the time to try to help you when you come at them with that attitude. I do.

Declined2/2/2015, 2:47:58 AM1 votes

{quoted} http://i.imgur.com/NQggLVa.jpg Attitude, mental state, irritation, joy, sadness, all factors that can win or lose you the game.

A) Interactions

  • Your mood will affect how you play, as well as how you interact. If you go into a match while angry, any little thing can set you off, and you will start to rage instead of focusing on the match.
  • Asking 'why' is almost always seen as an attack against someone, be it skill, knowledge or decisions, forcing them to focus on defending themselves rather than winning the game, it is a vicious cycle that can start simply with the word 'why'.
  • If you want people to listen, be courteous, and try to explain why they should do something, rather than demanding that they do it.

B) State of mind

  • Don't Panic !!!! Sometimes when threatened people forget everything and start running, that will get you killed.
  • Stay calm in fights and focus on kiting and keeping yourself alive, you can't do anything if you're dead.
  • Be nice to your support, he/she is there to contribute to the team, not to babysit you.
  • As a support, remind your ADC, to applaud you, for saving them, a simple “You’re welcome” can go a long way, they shouldn't just take you for granted. (This is the mental aspect, keep them in check and keep it friendly)
  • As an ADC, remember that confidence is good, but without knowing your limits you're nothing more than another dead would be hero.

C) Agitation and physical state. Don't play if you aren't feeling at your best, I cannot stress this enough. If you need to pee, you're hungry, your dog just died, don't play, take some time off and find yourself. If you do decide to play, at least listen to some music, eat something, that will help you to relax or focus.

D) Playful banter We all have our bad days, and it won't take much to set you off when you're feeling bad about something, so try to have fun in games rather than channeling your anger onto your teammates.

Originally Posted by Anonymous Rioter Playful banter and competitive taunting is just fine. To be even more specific, that depends entirely on the player it was directed to. Taunting the enemy can inject some levity into a normally high-pressured and hyper-competitive environment, which is something that is always appreciated by people who are perceptive enough to pick up on the intent.

So long as you avoid slipping in to verbally focus-firing on a single player (demoralizing him with nonconstructive comments, for example) and you make your intent clear that it's all done in friendly fun, then that shouldn't bring you any trouble. The only people I can imagine who might take offense would be those who take everything way too seriously, and let's face it--everything sets those people off. Just don't give it any mind. We play games to gain enjoyment and a momentary release from life, after all.

Just make sure you're not slipping in from friendly taunting to actively shooting (verbally) a specific person for their lack of skill or what have you. Mature people will usually get the intent, but then there are several exceptions to the rule.

tl;dr Play the game, not the chat.

freeformline2/3/2015, 10:05:26 PM1 votes

It looks like there has already been some good advice on dealing with your attitude while playing. I would recommend you simply take a break from League. Just don't play it for a month or so. If you choose to come back to it, you should be reminded why you started playing it in the first place. Focus on enjoying that and learn to ignore what you don't enjoy. Of course, always try to be friendly. Make a habit of saying nice things and issuing specific compliments when allies or enemies make a really good play or when someone helps you out. Even thanking a support for good warding helps. I find that working to maintain a positive appearance helps me stay positive in my own mind.

That said, you might also try to make the game less serious to yourself. Try some fun, off-meta picks and don't worry too much about how it turns out. Ever wanted to learn to play Urgot? You can't stay stressed when listening to the soothing voice of the Gem Knight Taric in the jungle! Make it a game, not a competition, and really focus on enjoying it.

Kylek7772/1/2015, 3:46:30 PM1 votes

If you're lacking the ability to control yourself, and this has just recently started, have you had any head injuries? The reason I ask is because a lot of times when people have severe head injuries, they suddenly find that they have a lack of self-control. There is a part of the brain called the prefrontal cortex, which by and large separates us from monkeys, and it's located in the very front of your brain. If it gets damaged, then controlling yourself becomes very hard. If this isn't the case, then you just need to change how you think. Instead of getting angry at a mistake, consider it a great opportunity to learn from and be thankful for that, then learn from it. Laugh at it. Don't get mad at it though. Think positive thoughts, ultimately they will change who you are:

Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words. Be careful of your words, for your words become your actions. Be careful of your actions, for your actions become your habits. Be careful of your habits, for your habits become your character. Be careful of your character, for your character becomes your destiny. -- Chinese proverb, author unknown

tseihei2/1/2015, 3:34:19 PM1 votes

I found that listening to loud music helps keep.me from tilting. Went from G3 to D5 doing that mostly because it keeps me separate from the game just enough that I don't rage.