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Champ Concept: Alfred EXIV, the King of Knights

midnight oil24·2/15/2017, 3:50:07 PM·3 votes·2,473 views

Lore: The United Sanctuary, the great kingdom where humans, elves, gnomes, warbeasts, and all other sorts of races come together. This prosperous land is ruled by the King of Knights, Alfred EXIV. He is a kind and wise ruler, one who hears the voices of all his subjects, and is always found on the front lines of the battlefield. However, he was not always the great ruler he is today. He used to be a brash prince who relied on others to fight for him. Even when he finally became the king, he still relied solely on others to fight well. Not that that is a bad thing in United Sanctuary, but the king could not fight if his allies were not there with him. It was only during the great war against the Star-Vaders of Link Joker that truly made him a great king. The Star-vaders were powerful, technologically advanced invaders that served the VOID, an ancient evil force that brought many worlds under its grip. He fought against overwhelming odds as warriors from all nations were corrupted by the powers of the VOID. Ethics Buster of the Star Gate Nation, Vowing Sword Dragon of the Dragon Empire, even the Royal Paladin's own Jewel Knight Ashlei were brought under the dread influence of "Reverse," a power wielded by these cyberorganic invaders. As the king fell into despair, his allies appeared before him. The presence of his old allies reaffirmed his conviction, and he finally accepted his place as leader of the United Sanctuary. He faced down Glendios, the greatest weapon of Link Joker, a world ending super weapon, and won with the assistance of his oldest ally, Blaster Blade. Now he rules the sanctuary with a fair and just hand, and he will be the first to rise to the call when the Sanctuary is in danger.

Abilities:

Passive: great ruler

For every 1% of his missing health, Alfred's armor increases by 3%.

Q: Radiant slash (8/7/6/ second cooldown)

Resets Alfred's autoattack timer, and he will deal bonus physical damage equal to 20/23/25% of his armor and 20/25/30% of his ad. He will restore health equal to 30/35/40% of the damage dealt.

W: Will of the King (20/18/16/14/13 second cooldown) Alfred passively gains magic resist when out of combat for five seconds. Active: Alfred sets down an area that, based on his MR, grants bonus armor and magic resist to all ally champions.

E: Divine right (15/13/12/11/10 second cooldown)

Gain a shield with 50/90/130/170/220 health scaling with level. In addition, the shield gains additional health scaling with your armor.

R: Savior of Cray (120/110/100 second cooldown) Active: heal for 10% of your max health over 5 seconds. You can still move during this time. At the end, cleanse all ally champions of all negative effects, including stasis. Stasis will not be broken if applied through Zonya's.

In-game, Alfred stands in the front and keeps on fighting, no matter what. He's a powerful juggernaut who grows more defensive as the fight wears on, and has the healing to keep going. He takes a different approach to Kled's "every battle is a final stand" idea, focusing instead on tanking the damage and healing, while occasionally cleansing your allies.

Friends: Blaster Blade, Gancelot, all other paladin units

Allies: Soul Saver Dragon, Sanctuary Guard Dragon, Blaster Dark, Mordred

Enemies: Glendios, Chaosbreaker dragon

Quotes:

Ally blaster blade: it is good to see you, old friend

Soul Saver dragon/sanctuary guard dragon: Few get to fight the guardian of the Sanctuary. This is a great honor.

Blaster Dark: If not for you, the Sanctuary would have been destroyed many times over. Thank you.

Glendios: For the sake of Cray, I will strike you down!

Camille: Your body makes absolutely no sense.

Jarvan: You're all flash, no substance.

Swain: I do not approve of how you fight, Swain!

Darius: What a savage way of fighting... No elegance at all.

http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/cardfight/images/b/ba/Blaster_Blade_Seeker_%26_Alfred_Exiv_(Full_Art).png/revision/latest?cb=20160205102508 (alfred is on the right) All credit for the image goes to bushiroad.

6 Comments

fugertech2/28/2017, 10:19:57 PM2 votes

*dusts off jacket*

Alright, I'm here now. I try to ensure all of my reviews are full-length and cover all the vital points of a champion, the two big categories being Lore and now the kit. With a handy-dandy month of CCOS judging behind me, I've also got a better idea of what to be looking for and how to go about suggesting the bad be handled.

DISCLAIMER: I put this at the beginning of all my critiques. Essentially, during my review I will sometimes make weak or otherwise attempts at humor and references. Generally, I'd hope my joking attitude can be picked up rather easily, but I know that sometimes that isn't the case. Anywho, I'd like to jump right into the review, so let's!

#ALFRED EXIV, KING OF KNIGHTS

##Lore

So my first impression of this lore went something along the lines of;

"What. In. The. Hell. Am. I. Reading?"

Upon first glance, Alfred's backstory seems fairly solid. I can totally get behind the idea of a Sanctuary where all manner of life comes together to live in harmony. That leaves plenty of lore room for things like betrayal, inner conflicts, and lots of sweet plot-twists, especially since the main character is some form of royalty.

However, once you mention Ahmes it begins to spiral downwards from there. Introducing all these names, proper nouns, and characters that no one but you will have ever met or heard of starts making this lore read like a poorly executed fanfiction where the entire cast is OC. As I mentioned on the CCOS post, your main problem here is just cleaning up your lore execution. Instead of introducing us to a new character, which we receive almost no backstory or information for despite his playing a large role in Alfred's life, you could have simply made a subtle reference to his existence. For example, the following line:

"However, he was not always the great ruler he is today. He used to be a brash prince who relied on Ahmes, better known as Blaster Blade, to protect him."

Could be re-written to sound something like this, and save us the trouble of trying to understand who Blaster Blade is:

"However, Alfred was not always the great and mighty ruler he is today. At one time, he was a brash prince who relied heavily on others to do the fighting for him, and was seen as a weakling because of it."

Little things like that can go a long way to making a Lore less confusing, more cohesive, and more fun to read.

##Kit

In this section, I'll be doing a full breakdown of Alfred's kit and the pros/cons of each ability. I might even suggest what you could do to improve him (I'll probably do that).

[Passive] - Great Ruler: Alright, a scaling defense mechanic on a tank is alright. Since he sacrifices % health for % armor, this is pretty decent and scales somewhat into the late game where you'd most likely have built more armor. Early game this is bad, since 15% of missing health only translates to 15% increase in armor. At 20 something armor, you're getting maybe 3 or 4 extra. I would suggest making it either scale a bit better or give Alfred something better for the early game, when most tanks shine a bit harder in solo lanes.

[Q] - Radiant Slash: Now this ability is absolutely useless. If all the damage it deals is 10-20% of Alfred's armor, then this damage is both negligible early game and negligible late game. At 200 armor, which is Thornmail + 2 other armor items. Half your item slots are full for you to do 40 bonus damage on one single autoattack.

instead, Radiant Slash might deal base damage that scales with Alfred's AD and his armor, giving him more viability as a Juggernaut or Bruiser. Based on the name, this ability could also restore a bit of health to him, though this is all up to you. Think of Alfred's theme; he's a powerful ruler. Shouldn't he be doing powerful ruler things?

[W] - Will of the King: The first part of this ability is actually nothing but self-harm and offers little in the way of actual benefits for Alfred. Not only do you harm yourself by 2% of your maximum health (That adds up really quickly, by the way) with every autoattack you make, but you also gain only 2 extra MR per 5% of your missing health.

Second comes this ability when it's toggled on. The max health heal every other attack definitely needs to go. In fact, I think this entire ability needs to be changed into something that A) Fits Alfred's theme and B) Actually adds counterplay or something unique to his kit.

Some ideas could be: - Alfred puts down an area that boosts his own and allied armor and magic resistance whilst they stand in it. Enemies have their armor and magic resistance reduced. - Alfred gains a shield that takes heavily reduced physical damage but slightly increased magic damage for several seconds.

Think on it. Again, these abilities need to have cohesiveness both with some of Alfred's other abilities and his lore/backstory. What kind of Kingly things should a King be doing? Why would he be doing them?

[E] - Divine Right: I suppose this shield covers my previous idea. I'm not sold on how big the shield can get (20% of your maximum health if you've got all 4 allies around you) but I'm also not sold on how small it is if nobody is around (5% of your maximum health is probably not going to cut it). Also, this ability doesn't scale. One of the main things about a champion's kit that makes them useful in their respective roles is the fact that their abilities scale with level and/or stats. My suggestion?

Make this shield have a base health amount, scaling with level (say 50, 90, 130, 170, 220), and give it scaling based on his maximum health (say 8%). Perhaps it can have an additional effect, like I mentioned above. Or maybe the shield can give Alfred better damage while it is active.

[R] - Savior of Cray: A 5-second-channeled Cleanse that grabs back a small portion of his maximum health? The only problem I'm seeing, again, is that there's no scaling. This would make Alfred tremendously good against champions like Morgana or Nautilus who have copious amounts of CC, but would require you changing this ability from a channel into a delayed effect. Otherwise, a King providing his subjects with courage and aid in a time of need fits the theme.

##Conclusion

Alfred definitely needs some fine-tuning. What with the strange over-immersive and confusing lore, his generally useless abilities, and the lack of anything that scales on him, he gets easily overshadowed by much more effective and mechanically interesting Juggernauts and tanks. Take Darius for example: Darius both has an effective heal on top of massive self-enhancing and overpowering damage. That is the literal definition of a Juggernaut: A tank/fighter lacking in good CC or mobility but packing overwhelming self-enhancing damage. If Juggernaut is the theme you're going for, Alfred should be able to overwhelm his opponents if they're dumb enough to fight him one-on-one.

I hope this info helps you in some way or another. Best of luck to you when creating all your concepts. If you ever need anything else, feel free to leave a comment on something I post and I'll do my best to assist.

Same goes for everyone, really.

Salutations and Stay Frosty.

Chembaron Yamada2/15/2017, 4:16:08 PM1 votes

First I have to get this out of my head: Warbeasts? Don't you mean Werebeasts? I am really confused.

Second: I would rework that idea a bit if I were you.

  1. Change his title.... King of Knights just doesn't sound right.....
  2. The W: the first passive that makes you lose health doesn't really have enough benefit (you just get a bit additional armor because of your passive) to justify it's use over the huge regen you get from the other. You should rebalance this skill.
  3. Your ult should differentiate between the source of the stasis. If it is caused by a Bard ult, it should cleanse it, but not if it is caused by Zonyas. Otherwise you would make an ally who wanted this stasis to not die targetable again and probably cause his death.

The concept is pretty simple, but that doesn't have to be bad. But I am not sure what he is meant to be. His skills are very defensive, making him look like a tank. But he doesn't provide any CC and his ult is his only group utility.... Which could make him lean towards being a juggernaut. But I am not sure if his damage is justifying him to be a juggernaut.... What I want to say: Maybe you should share your thought what you actually want to accomplish with that champion. :)

The Dreamwalker2/16/2017, 3:50:26 PM1 votes

Passive: I like it. Although, I would probably make every 2% health gain 1% armor, but it is fine as it is.

Q: It honestly sounds good to me.

W: I am unsure. It feels a little messy. The active counters his passive.

E: It has an Irelia feel, but it's different.

R: Sounds like a great support ability.

Overall: I feel like his is sort of... confused. Would this champion be a support? If he is, he isn't really the support type. If you could let me know, I would appreciate it. Otherwise, good job.