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Delyora, The Starheart Blacksmith

CRYOATIC01·12/28/2016, 3:12:30 AM·11 votes·2,162 views

Delyora The Star-Heart Blacksmith

https://madamlofty.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/non-mem-fire-priest-look.jpg?w=265&h=300

Disclaimer: I do not own this picture or any of the pictures in this concept, i found them all off google images and edited them. i do not claim ownership of any picture on this page.

Note: You probably won't understand most of the overview until you have read Delyora's lore and passive ability (innate).

Overview: Delyora is a Top lane tank or duelist (yes i mean or, not both) he thrives in drawn out fights, alowing him to get his stacks of starfire (W passive) on as many enemies as possible. He is a hybrid champion with a focus on auto attacks (not as his damage source, but to get the stacks applied to his target). he has two functioning kits ingame, but you must choose one or the other at the beginning of each game. (hence the "or" from earlier) both kits need starfire stacks inflicted on a target, just how they do it and for what purpose is determined by which path you choose at the beginning of the game.

Side note: IF there is something i can do to improve on it, please tell me.

Lore: Delyora Grew up as the son of two Military Officials In the great city of Targon. Because of this, he lived a very privileged life in his younger years. Attending numerous meetings and socializing with only the most seasoned warriors and military commanders the world had to offer. That is, however, until both of his parents were accused and found guilty of stealing large amounts of profit over the years from Targon’s armies, Outraged to learn of the council member’s treason, the people of Targon stormed Delyora’s home and murdered his parents whilst he watched from a crack in the closet door he was hiding in. With his parents dead and no one willing to take him in, young Delyora was placed in an orphanage where, upon learning who his parents where, he was constantly beaten and terrorized by both the young and old of the city. It wasn't until seven years later, when Delyora was 16 years old, that an elderly man took him in to be his apprentice in the art of forging. Because of the years of trauma Delyora had endured, he did not trust the kindly stranger, fearing that he was merely tricking him into another beating as many had done before with false promises of companionship. But over time, as the old man protected him time and time again from those who meant him harm, Delyora finally began to warm up to the old fool. As the man taught him how to smith weapons in tools in his forge on the outer edge of the city, Delyora found that he was naturally talented at not only crafting weapons, but at fighting with them too. For hours upon hours each day he practiced with swords, hammers, and anything else he could find the time to create. He soon became one of the greatest weapon smiths and combatants in the city and yet, despite his gifts, no one besides the old man he came to see as his second father ever saw him for more than the son of two criminals. Crestfallen and distraught, Delyora forged a mask of gold and iron to hide his face, and left the city and headed into the mountains to build his own forge away from the ridicule of those who refused to see him as his own person, separate from the actions of his former parents. Then, on the eve of the annual Star Light festival, an event that Delyora rarely went to for fear of being dragged into an alleyway to be beaten by yet another group of his adversaries, That a large, magnificent beast burst forth from the sky, cloaked in the raw beauty and fury of the cosmos, bending and shaping the heavens around him with the ease that only a master craftsman possesses. It was while watching the stars orbiting the dragon, feeling the searing heat as each one passed overhead, that Delyora had a revelation. He sprinted to the top of the nearest mountain and called to the great dragon saying, “ Great dragon! Hear me! I have seen no flame so pure or powerful than that you possesses, please give me a portion of your starfire to use in my forge.” At this, the God-like being bellowed and said, “A species as primitive as yours is incapable of handling my starfire. None but I can wield it.” But, still a young man, Delyora was stubborn and persistent. Insisting for days that the dragon share the flames with him. Growing bored, and annoyed, the dragon called down one of the many stars that surrounded him and brought it down upon the mountain in which Delyora was standing, shattering it and nearly killing him in the process. Frustrated and feeling humiliated, Delyora went back to his forge, fuming at the selfishness of the beast. It was just as Delyora was getting ready to head into town for supplies for his forge that he was met with 8 of Targon’s armed guard and the 10 council members. Fearing that they had come to punish him for angering the deity, he mentally prepared himself to flee through a backdoor of his forge. But, rather than trying to arrest him, one of the council members stepped forward and assigned Delyora with the task of making a headpiece made of stargems for the Dragon. Infuriated by the request to honor the beast that had humiliated and nearly killed him, he attempted to strike the council member but was quickly restrained by two of the armed guard as the Council explained that, with the use of the Headpiece, the wished to not only command the dragon, but wipe his stars from the sky anytime he refused to comply with their instructions. Seeing this as the opportunity he had been waiting for, Delyora readily agreed to forge the crown so long as he be given the heart of every star that was destroyed. After a brief discussion, the council agreed to his wishes and provided him with the stargems he would need to create the headpiece. Working with newfound purpose, Delyora slaved over the crafting of the headpiece for weeks on end, forging and shaping the stones in the way only a true master of the craft could accomplish. After he had finished this, his greatest work, he presented it to the council who then gave it to the dragon. The great beast, much to Delyora’s relief, accepted the gift. The moment he donned the crown, although he didn’t realize it at the time, Aurelion Sol was bound to the Council for which Delyora had made another 10 crowns of silver and starstone that allowed them to command the cosmic deity.
Over time, the dragon grew tired of the fledgling civilization and left Targon. And so, the council donned their headpieces and began to take command of the dragon. It was not long before Aurelion Sol rebelled against his newfound captors. And with his first outburst, fell the first star. Its heart falling to Targon below where it was retrieved and given to Delyora. Never before had he worked with such a violent beauty as starfire. It strengthened his blades so that the never dulled, although the flames nearly destroyed his forge every time he attempted to use them. Each star, he found, manifested itself in his creation with different properties that added their own personality to the already masterful creations. Some caused wounds inflicted by his weapons to weigh those he had struck down with starfire till their pace was little more than a shamble. Whilst other seared through armour and runes as though they were fresh linen. But perhaps the most significant change that went unnoticed happened in Delyora himself. As he worked with the stars, which were once a part of Aurelion Sol himself, he slowly absorbed some of the power contained in each one. Dramatically slowing his aging process as he gained more and more of the Dragons immortality. However, Delyora never noticed this. He was more keen to work in his forge with his newfound fire than to watch the change in the world around him. After all, the world had rebuked him and he could surely rebuke the world in return. However, over time the steady supply of star hearts he had been receiving began to dwindle steadily until they ceased altogether. Running low on his supply, Delyora confronted the Council only to find that they were more content to fight and bicker amongst themselves than to control the dragon. Fearing that if he was not able to continue making great works for Targon, the people would revert back to the days of hatred towards him for the actions of his parents. He gathered up the remaining Stars Hearts he still had left and set out in pursuit of the dragon. If the council could not control Aurelion Sol, he would have to do it himself.

Appearence: yes i know there is a picture, but it is not exact. it was just the closest representation i could get on the internet. Delyora is a secluded fellow, preferring to keep his face hidden to avoid the prying eyes of his possible tormentors (whom he sees in almost everyone) his physical descriptoion is almost exactley like the picture above, but he does not have the fire cape and his eyes glow a deep blue with some astral flame coming out of the mask in little wisps of blue and white. all his abilites that deal with starfire (the bonuses based on stacks) are bright blue and orange. (just think about Aurelion sols color theme) he still wears a black cloak and the gold mask like in the picture, just the fire and his eyes are different. also his sword does not look like that XD.

Delyora’s Kit:

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/09/WxDrm.png Passive: Starfire Smithing

Delyora starts each game with 3 Star Hearts that can be used to forge his own unique weapons in the shop. The weapon he chooses determines the effects of his abilities as well as the weapon he wields throughout the game. Delyora will only buy one weapon per game and refuses to sell it after he has left the shop. The Weapon he chooses to make can be upgraded (at the expense of a Star Heart) giving him bonus stats and effects.

Delyora’s Weapons:

Hammers:

Starforged Hammer (Costs 400G + 1 Star Heart) Bonus HP (about 60) Bonus AD (about 5) Bonus health regen (about 5 per 5 seconds)

Unique Passive: Debilitating Starfire- Units inflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire are slowed by a percentage of their max movement speed per Stack. ( about 1%)

Starborn Hammer (Costs 850G + 1 Star Heart + Starforged Hammer) Bonus HP (about 150) Bonus AD (about 15) Bonus AP (about 10)

Unique passive: Depilitating Starfire- Units inflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire are slowed by a percentage of their max movement speed per Stack. (about 2%)

Unique active: Crushing strike- Delyora strikes the area in front of him dealing physical damage scaling with Delyora’s AP and AD and applies a stack of starfire to all enemy units in the area.(18 second cooldown)

StarHeart Greathammer (Costs 650G +1 Star Heart + Tiamat +Starborn Hammer + Jaurims fist) Bonus HP (about 450) Bonus AD (about 40) Bonus AP (about 30)

Unique Passive: Debilitating Starfire- Units inflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire are slowed by a percentage of their max movement speed per Stack. (about 3%)

Unique Passive: Cleave- basic attacks deal magic damage scaling with AP and AD to enemies around the target and apply a stack of starfire to all units hit. Deals 1/3rd damage to targets near the edge. (does not apply additional starfire stack to the target of the auto attack, still applies bonus damage to them.)

Unique Active: Crushing strike- Delyora strikes the area in front of him dealing physical damage scaling with AD and AP and applies a stack of starfire to all enemy units hit. (16 second cooldown)

Delyora Weapons:

Swords:

Starforged Shortsword (Costs 450G + 1 Star Heart) Bonus AD (about 10) Bonus AP (about 8)

Unique Passive: Corrosive Starfire- Delyora’s basic attacks and activated abilities against Units inflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire go through a percentage of their armour and magic resist for each stack. (about 1% per stack)

Starborn Rapier (Costs 850G +1 Star Heart + Starforged Shortsword) Bonus AD (about 25) Bonus AP (about 15)

Unique Passive: Corrosive Starfire- Delyora’s basic attacks and activated abilities against Units inflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire go through a percentage of their armour and magic resist for each stack. (about 1.5% per stack)

Unique Active: Piercing Strike- (AA reset) Delyora empowers his next auto attack, dealing bonus damage scaling with his AP and applies a stack of starfire. (14 second cooldown)

Starheart Longsword (Costs 400G +1 Star Heart + B.F. Sword +Recurve Bow) Bonus AD (about 70) Bonus AP (about 45) Bonus AS (about 20%)

Unique Passive: Corrosive Starfire- Delyora’s basic attacks and activated abilities against Units afflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire go through a percentage of their armour and magic resist for each stack. (about 2% per stack)

Unique Passive: Star Heart's Fury- while attacking a unit inflicted with one or more stacks of starfire, Delyora gains bonus attack speed for each stack inflicted on that target. (about 5% per stack, max of 30%)

Unique Active: Piercing Strike- (AA reset) Delyora's next auto attack deals bonus magic damage scaling with his AD and AP and applies an additional stack of starfire. (12 second cooldown)

Q - Depredating arc / Incising strike Cooldown (approximate) 10/9/8/7/6

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/10/WkOXw.png Depredating arc (Hammer)

Delyora strikes the ground in front of him dealing 50/70/90/110/130 (+30% AD)(+6% of Delyoras Max health) physical damage in a cone and applies a stack of starfire to all enemy units in the area leaving behind a patch of unstable starfire on the ground. After .75 seconds, the starfire erupts dealing 50/70/90/110/130 (+35% AP) (+6% of Delyoras Max health) magic damage.

If an enemy champion with 4 or more stacks of starfire is in the area when it erupts, Delyora gains a shield for up to 100/175/250/325/400 (+15% of of Delyoras Max health) damage for a few 2 seconds scaling with the highest amount of stacks among enemy units in the zone.

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/10/jyh1L.png Incising Strike (Sword)

Delyora strikes the ground in a line in front of him dealing 80/110/140/170/200 (+85% AD) physical damage to all enemies hit. If a unit hit is inflicted with one or more starfire stacks, incising strike does a bonus 15% percentage of the initial damage as magic damage for each stack of starfire consumed on the target.

If an enemy champion struck by incising strike is inflicted with 4 or more stacks of starfire, Delyora heals for 3% of his missing health (+5% of his bonus AP) per stack of starfire consumed.

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/10/dHS2g.png W- Celestial Flames Cooldown (approximate) 10 seconds at all ranks

Passive: Forged in Starfire- Delyora’s auto attacks inflict starfire on the target stacking up to 6 times.

These stacks last for 4/4.5/5/5.5/6 seconds.

Delyora’s active abilities against targets afflicted with one or more stacks of starfire consume all starfire stacks on the target.

After Starfire has been consumed on a target, it cannot be reapplied on that same target for 4/3/2/1/0 seconds.

Active- (Hammer) (Toggle on and Off)

   Delyora surrounds himself with starfire, dealing 20/30/40/50/60 (+15% of Delyoras AP)(+1% of Delyoras max health) magic damage per second  to all units in the area and applies one stack of starfire every  2/1.75/1.5/1.25/1 seconds to units hit. 

   If a Unit afflicted with 4 or more stacks of starfire is in the area when Celestial flames is toggled on, the starfire wraps itself around them, slowing  them by 20% to 50% (scaling with the number of stacks on those hit) for 1.5 seconds.

Active- (Sword)

   Delyora creates a disc of starfire and throws it out towards target location, dealing 70/100/130/160/190 (+90% AP) magic damage to the first enemy unit hit.
   If an enemy champion hit was inflicted with 4 or more stacks of starfire, they take 15/20/25/30/35 (+3% of the targets current health) bonus magic damage per stack of starfire consumed over the next 5 seconds.

E- Targons Might / Targons Reach Cooldown (approximate) 22/20/18/16/14

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/10/uf5n8.png Targons Might (Hammer)

   Delyora rushes forward to target enemy unit dealing 40/70/100/130/160 (+50% AD) (+5% of Delyoras current health) to all enemy units in a small area upon arriving.

   If the target of this ability is afflicted with 4 or more stacks of Starfire, Targon's Might does up tp 10/30/50/70/90 (+45% Bonus AP) bonus magic damage to the target and stuns it for up to 2 seconds (bonus damage and time of stun scale with the number of stacks of starfire on the target)

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/10/JO9EL.png Targons Reach (Sword)

   Delyora lunges forward, dealing 40/80/120/160/200 (+35% AD) physical damage to all enemies in front of him. If Delyora hits an enemy champion, he briefly becomes untargetable as he dashes through them, dealing 10/15/20/25/30 (+5% AP) bonus magic damage based per stacks of Starfire on the first enemy champion hit and continues on for a fixed distance behind them.

   If Delyora consumes 4 or more stacks of Starfire from champions hit, he allows the consumed flames to dance upon his blade, causing his next two auto-attacks to deal up to 10/20/30/40/50 (+60% AD) bonus magic damage based on the amount of Starfire consumed. These attacks count as critical strikes.

R- Starheart Surge / Starheart Rage

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/10/b9Egh.png Starheart Surge (Hammer) (Costs 100 mana at all ranks) Cooldown 130/110/90 seconds

Active Delyora Briefly focuses the energy of the Star Hearts into his hammer channeling for 1 second before throwing his hammer to target location knocking up all surrounding enemy units dealing 200/350/500 (+80% bonus AP) (+7% of Delyoras max health) magic damage and applies 4/5/6 stacks of starfire to all units hit. If an enemy unit hit by Starheart Surge is already applied with max stacks of starfire, all units hit by this ability are also pulled to the point of impact. (enemies hit by this ability are untargetable for the duration of the Knockup/pull) Delyora can reactivate this ability within the next 3 seconds to dash to the point where his hammer struck. (no cost)

http://i.picresize.com/images/2017/01/10/0yTa.png Starheart Rage (Sword) (Costs 100 mana at all ranks) Cooldown 120/100/80 seconds

Active Delyora leaps to target enemy champion within 400 units. Impaling them with his blade dealing 100/150/200 (+60% AD) physical damage and 100/150/200 (+70% AP) magic damage (scaling with AP). Starheart rage deals more damage the lower health the target is, maxing out when the target is below 33% health. (100% bonus damage, for example, if the initial damage was 350, it would max out to 700 when the target is below 33% health) If Starheart rage kills the target, their body becomes overloaded with starfire and, after a short duration, it erupts dealing 20% of the initial damage as magic damage for each stack of starfire the champion was inflicted with in a large cone behind it. Starheart Rage also applies 4/5/6 stacks of starfire to all enemy champions in the cone. (deals less damage the closer to the edge of the cone those hit are. down to 33% at the edge.) the cone is (approximately) 695 units long by 500 units wide at its edge.

Special thanks to Billcurme who helped me redesign and give balance to the kits as well as revise the lore to make it more realistic. I couldn’t have done it without you man, thanks for everything.

CCOS Reviews:

http://boards.na.leagueoflegends.com/en/c/skin-champion-concepts/sz7xwkF0-champion-concept-drifter-the-envoy-of-wisps?comment=0005

http://boards.na.leagueoflegends.com/en/c/skin-champion-concepts/BEbuGjGZ-kobek-shurimas-servant-fightermage?comment=0007

Itemization: (incomplete) Note: Obviously one of his item slots will be taken up by either his Sword or hammer. as such, you will only have 5 item slots to work with for other in-game items.

Hammer: The hammer path is primarily a tanky disruptor/control mage. as such, most of his items will either be health related or scale off AP. as such, most of his items will be tanky mage items like Rod of Ages.

Sword: The hammer path is very auto attack reliant, but he scales well off both AD and AP. Because of this one of the most, if not the most, essential items in his kit (other than his Sword) is Guinsoo's Rageblade.

Selection: I could forge you a masterpiece, if you'd like. Ban: Nothing that hasn't happened to me before.

Movement: Time to continue this journey. Need more supplies. I remember this place. It seems.... Different somehow. The world has changed so much. When? None of this makes sense anymore... Weapon is ready, Starhearts secured... Am i forgetting something?

Killing an enemy: Feels good to be on top for once. Huh. this ended differently when i was younger. Guess you weren't ready... Should've practiced more. Maybe if you had had a proper weapon, things would've been different.

Taunts: A shoughty weapon makes a shoughty fighter. Maybe if you had a good weapon you would stand a chance. oh well. You? Beat me? With that? You can't be serious.

enemy gangplank: Barrels.... you actually fight with barrels.

enemy jayce: That weapon is... it's a... i don't know what that is.

Tanting an enemy jax: Your's and my definitions of a real weapon are vastly different.

Taunting an enemy Aurelion sol: You denied me once, i will not be denied again. Your own selfishness forged your prison. i was merely the tool used to do so.

killing an enemy Aurelion Sol: Seems fitting for you to end by your own flames. I actually admired you. till the whole trying to kill me bit happened. that did put a downer on things. You were a fool to have denied me. Even gods can't always have a happy ending.

Buying an item: shabby, but useful i suppose. I could probably make something better... I could use the design... Mines better...

Joke near an ally Pantheon: Your shield is... nice. You want to fight with me? Really? :D

Attacking (sword): Pierced by Starlight My blades always make a clean cut. Don't worry, my blades are never dull. The cut will be clean.

Attacking (hammer): Crushed beneath one of my finest work. Know the weight of MY world. You're just a shoddy piece, waiting to be forged.

Joke near an Ally Jarven IV: The weapon is nice, but if you like, I can make one worthy of a king.

Taunt near an enemy Jarven IV: Who ever heard of an extending spear?

joke near ally poppy: (while on sword path) I should try that design sometime. Could be better... oh, sorry, i was just admiring your weapon.

(while on hammer path) Like two peas in a pod. I could make one better. if you want.

taunting an enemy riven: Well, i suppose it WAS a nice blade.

when riven uses ult: (surprised/frightened) OH, OK, IT'S BIG NOW! speed forging, useful for a second. before you break it again.

Note: i designed this champion to have two separate kits with their own respective playstyles. the hammer path (that's what im calling it for now) is ment to be played as a tanky disruptor. going in first in a team fight and locking down multiple targets with CC to let his team come in and clean things up. The sword path is more of a single target duelist. you want to jump from one target to the next to get the job done. one thing at a time is the best action to take if you use the sword as your weapon of choice.

18 Comments

Morcyth12/30/2016, 4:36:29 PM2 votes

Let me start of by saying that I absolutely love the lore and concept of this character. Everything about him seems well balanced and extremely fun to use/play.

His lore was a blast to read, I started it not thinking much about his name and instantly got exited when it connected him with Aurelion Sol and the crown. Overall a very well done and entertaining lore. I loved reading this lore, the drawing in of a beaten character with a skimmed over past though bothers me every time.

His passive is incredibly unique in the personal item department. Along with the cdr on his items. It's a kit definer that isn't exactly stats thrown at him till he is balanced (or unbalanced).

His Hammer (Kit and Item) (Item) Pretty strong item, interesting to turn it into a kind of Titanic Hydra item. The slow is kind of eh, but it is a nice choice for his item passive.

(Kit w/Hammer) It sure does nail the Tank Disrupter archetype

Q - (Kind of a Brutal CD) Feels/sounds pretty similar to poppy's, shield passive and all, not sure if that is what you wanted or not. I would recommend changing the shield part of it if you want to make it a bit more unique.

W (Passive) I honestly believe that having the duration doubled is a bit much. The Hammer slow would be what, a 20% slow for 12 seconds, that's just awkward and annoying. (Active) Why is the snare there, he is a Disrupter but still maybe just make it an extra slow. The snare is just seemingly thrown into an ability that makes little sense on. I don't know how I feel about this ability.

E This is a decent charge like ability, but how fast is he moving? Does he get a MS boost? I am assuming he does with you saying rush. But other than that maybe if you want to keep the stun you could move it here, it would become single target though. The true damage on-hit seems out of place here too, but not that bad.

R The ult with its 1 second cooldown is well balanced in my opinion. It is a kind of ability that is like if a Malphite ult and an Orianna ult were mixed together. Might be too strong to have on only a 1 second delay but it does allow for it to be canceled/flashed out of.

His Sword(Kit and Item) (Item) Interesting item but is there no base attack speed added with the Longsword? You just buy the Recurve Bow for the passive right? Everything else is good just a curious question I had.

(Kit w/Sword) Q - (Kind of a brutal CD) Kind of a bland skillshot, kinda feels similar to Yasuo's. Nothing I don't really like about this Q.

W Seems like a secondary ignite sum. I would love to Dubstep Celestial Flames people.

E I really like this E it sounds awesome and it has only 1 dash making it an all in or nothing dash. I would love to use it.

R If I could use the word overloaded anywhere it MIGHT!!!! be here emphasis I might. This is because this ability feels like a Darius ult with a gap closer. Different in particles ad effects and such but the starfire stacks, the execute to do it again, the bonus damage if you get'em with max stacks. I love this ult and everything but it is incredibly similar to Darius' but with a twist. I would need to see some differences, maybe if you could point them out or better yet define what the difference between that ult and this one is.

Quotes lower case letters at the beginning of some lines are tilting me out of my existence. i cannot say anything else atm i cant deal with it. lol [slayer-jinx-unamused]

Overall I absolutely love this character lore and kit. I would play this champ on release. Unique and incredibly flexible. Although he may become pick/ban due to his incredible versatility and as a tank he is what most teams want a Malphite-Ori combo. All in all he is on the strong side when it comes to HOW MUCH he does not sure if he does them all the best though.

Cryptekz12/30/2016, 8:26:43 PM1 votes

You asked for my help, so here I am.

Let me say first and foremost I find that Delyora is much more well rounded now than initially, although without base stats and actual numbers it is hard to judge how this champion would function in some degrees. My one major qualm is that you have to purchase one of the two starting items to begin the match, as his abilities are dependent on them. However, unless starting sword form, Delyora finds himself with no way to sustain in lane despite being a Melee champion.

This is problematic.

There are ways around this (Taking Teleport, playing passive until hitting 4-500g and backing for a doran's shield/corrupting potion) but even so, he feels like he's automatically at a bit of a disadvantage compared to most melee laners in this regard, who have the option at least of starting with some kind of sustain item. As he exists now, he will get hard countered by a champ with any sort of range in their kit, leading him to have to go sword form against them, which may not be what his team needs at all, or else get utterly bullied out of lane. If you intended this as a balancing lever, so be it, but as it stands I think that weakness would be relatively crippling for a solo-laner to put up with.

The other problem I see is with his sword-form ultimate.

As has already been expressed, it functions a little bit too much like a Darius ult with the reset on execution. I personally like the idea that perhaps blood and starfire have some unique chemical reaction, which means that if you kill someone with the initial activation, you gain some sort of re-activatable ability like a riven wind slash, perhaps, or maybe just an additional steroid (Though you've already got those in spades, so perhaps another might not be reasonable)

I just want something for this champ that makes his ultimate feel unique. Something that draws from the idea of the heart of the stars that the weapon is forged with. Maybe if he kills someone with the first strike of the ult, it forms a supernova, pulling in other nearby enemies and dealing damage over time before exploding? Just a suggestion.

Prime Beholder12/29/2016, 3:02:54 AM1 votes

A bit overloaded with some weapons, might be hard to counterplay. You might want to tone the damage against epic monsters.

IA9hRfpP5q1/1/2017, 2:42:12 AM1 votes

so... Bellona? (SMITE)

BowieTheNifty1/5/2017, 5:06:25 AM1 votes

So sense you gave me a review on my concept I will give you one on yours. Now I am not going to go over lore as I am not the best with it. Though the kit I give a look over as game play matters in the long run.

Passive

Unique item passives have been explored a little bit, but this one is interesting. Instead you have the item dictate his entire kit right from the get go. Which while that is all and good, I feel like one will triumph over the other. This is especially true based on that his main item builds out of others in the shop. Honestly it might be better just to have the item be upgraded by the hearts and gold rather then force players to build certain items? This would make shop management a bit easier for the player. This also doesnt lock a players build path. Well I can see that this champ is considered a mixed damage melee fighter. A hammer for more bulk and sword for more DPS, that is all well and good. Though this is already a lot to take in, but having 50% of CDR also going to active items? That is cool but I don't think it's a good place on this concept. It feels tacked on, you know? Let's get to each weapon. The hammer basically applies a stacking slow for all the starfire on a target. All well and good, though after reading through the whole kit, I have to ask. What is the maximum amount of starfire allowed on a target? This is important to mention as somethings in the kit need this from what I read. As well this can put him over the edge for balance reasons depending on the total. Plus the cleave effect is nice but I feel like this can be put on another part of the kit. As well it would give way for more item builds like the hydras. The sword on the other hand is a bit eh for me. Basically it's just free pen on armor and magic resist for stacks on a target. Now considering that the sword applies stacks on basic attacks, and another passive in the kit aplies stacks on basic attacks, does this mean they gain two from the sword each attack? Kinda busted and redundant. The active portions on both items are fine, but the passives on their final stages are not.

Q Now this reminds me of poppys Q. All well and good, but gaining a shield if they have 4 or more stacks? Personally it doesn't make sense. It should have some CC in its place as you stated that the hammer is for control. Am I right? The sword feels similar to the hammer version. It hits an area and deals damage but instead does it all at once with percentage more damage based on stacks. The 4 stacks grants him a heal based on the stacks of the enemies hit. This can be busted due to the fact he applies stacks to multiple targets already. So he could sustain for a lot with this. Should either make this only hit one target or grant him attack speed perhaps? This is a way to replace the 3rd tier sword passive without changing the functionality of the kit.

W Okay so starfire is a huge part of this kit. It might be better to move this to his innate passive then here. A suggestion of course. Being a toggle ability that has a special effect if turned on or off depending on stacks though. While unique I feel as if it would be better off as an active. Keeping it a toggle you should make it that it only applies the additional effect when turned on would be better to balance. Plus the double slow from one ability could be a bit much for the hammer. Now I noticed that the sword portion is completely different from its other version. That is a good thing. Though what I don't like is how much AOE the sword has available. There should be strengths and weaknesses to each weapon. While swords are versitile, they can't do everything. I would suggest giving the sword more single target focus. A question on the bonus effect. Does the current health damage go over 4 seconds or just the AP damage?

E The hammer version is good all around. Adds some mobility to enemies and a bit of CC along with it. Of this this is dependent on stacks. Making the next basic attack stun seems a bit bland. You could just have the ability itself either stun or knock up. Your choice. The sword is a little strange, but I like it. Though perhap make dashing through the opponent a fixed distance rather then on starfire. You can increase the distance per rank and make it easier for balance. The bonus for it seems fine and suits it as well.

R One thing I noticed about this kit is the amount of passives it has. From a designer perspective, it is bland. A passives that go off a passive isn't a good mechanic. All it is doing is doubling the slow or pen he gains if they are at max. Instead why not grant a different bonus here if they are at max stacks. Something that both hammer and sword can benefit from so that the two passives aren't different and it helps with balance too. The hammer ultimate is a strong one. The amount of CC is insane. A knock up with a pull on all enemies if only one target is effected by max stacks. Plus he can dash to the hammer if he wants too. The dash part I don't mind. Though I hate how it pulls everyone if one person has the max stacks. The pull should only effect those with max stacks sense it already knocks up an entire crowd. Cause that is way too strong in my book. So from a different perspective the sword is way strong too. You have a double execute here. It is nice that it is single target but having the double execute is too much. Think about it from an enemy's point of view. It's a dash that deals more damage if the target is at lower health so based on health threshold, then if they have stacks of starfire that is additional missing health damage. It's redundant in a sense. Making the cone damage afterwards based on the damage of the intial target as well, might not be the best either. A good fix could be that if it kills the target the cone damage could be based on the starfire stacks of the target killed. Just an idea.

Overall Having a champion concept like this is difficult to review. You have basically two in one with no interchangeability between them. Because of this things overlap between each kit not giving a clear weakness or strength to each one in its current state. It's hard to manage a concept like this one as each kit appears to be their own champion. Not saying this is bad, just difficult to deal with. Though in all I feel as done parts in the kit is out of place. Like the starfire is so important it should be apart of the innate passive rather then on a skill. The items themselves could use tweaks. The hammer kit feels good but can have minor work done to it. The sword should have more cons to it, that is just me I believe. Anyways I hope this helps. I have a flight to catch in the morning.

ModThe Djinn5/19/2017, 4:10:22 AM1 votes

As requested, a review!

First note -- I strongly encourage designers posting here to not use quote boxes in their ability write-ups, as the "reply" button never captures those. It means I have to do a LOT of copy/pasting and sometimes reformatting to get the abilities for replies, which is inconvenient.

LORE -- going to skip this for now, if that's alright. If you want a Lore analysis I can definitely give one, but I tend to skip it in preliminary overviews. Part of why I often recommend a brief "fantasy rundown," if you will, that gives a TL:DR version of the character's final portrayal, so I can see how their character matches their role and abilities. Usually in addition to lore, of course -- the stories are always fun.

Passive: Starfire Smithing

Delyora starts each game with 3 Star Hearts that can be used to forge his own unique weapons in the shop. The weapon he chooses determines the effects of his abilities as well as the weapon he wields throughout the game. Delyora will only buy one weapon per game and refuses to sell it after he has left the shop. The Weapon he chooses to make can be upgraded (at the expense of a Star Heart) giving him bonus stats and effects.

Right off the bat this does two things -- interest me, and worry me. A champion with multiple forms is one thing, but a champion where the enemy doesn't know what ability set they'll be bringing bothers me. It's a cool new thing, but I'm worried that it will play havoc with expectations, with ban/pick phases, etc. One of the things I'll be looking at, then, is how similar the forms are -- if the differences are small this is probably okay. If they're role-defining it's more problematic, as the character becomes harder to predict, and harder to remember.

I'll also take a quick jaunt here to the W passive and note that the stacks stack up to 6x, and are removed whenever the stacks are consumed by an ability.

Greathammer

Unique Passive: Debilitating Starfire- Units inflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire are slowed by a percentage of their max movement speed per Stack. (about 3%)

Unique Passive: Cleave- basic attacks deal magic damage scaling with AP and AD to enemies around the target and apply a stack of starfire to all units hit. Deals 1/3rd damage to targets near the edge. (does not apply additional starfire stack to the target of the auto attack, still applies bonus damage to them.)

Unique Active: Crushing strike- Delyora strikes the area in front of him dealing physical damage scaling with AD and AP and applies a stack of starfire to all enemy units hit. (16 second cooldown)

So the slow of the first forms is so low as to be non-existent. We're talking a 6% slow from the level 1 item, and an 18% slow from the level 3 item. That's with full stacks. It might be better to include a baseline amount, or find some other manner of applying this -- perhaps an active on all of them that strikes in an AoE, dealing damage and applying a slow to all targets in the area that increases based on the number of starfire stacks they have. Then you avoid the perma-slow, and make the stacks more valuable (and the high point of the slow stronger).

I won't comment on the specific stat bonuses, because those are easily adjustable.

Longsword

Unique Passive: Corrosive Starfire- Delyora’s basic attacks and activated abilities against Units afflicted with one or more stacks of Starfire go through a percentage of their armour and magic resist for each stack. (about 2% per stack)

Unique Passive: Star Heart's Fury- while attacking a unit inflicted with one or more stacks of starfire, Delyora gains bonus attack speed for each stack inflicted on that target. (about 5% per stack, max of 30%)

Unique Active: Piercing Strike- (AA reset) Delyora's next auto attack deals bonus magic damage scaling with his AD and AP and applies an additional stack of starfire. (12 second cooldown)

Again, 6-12% penetration is almost unnoticeable, and definitely doesn't feel fun. Star Heart's Fury is cool though, and a fun way to incentivize sticking to a target. I might cut Corrosive Starfire completely and increase Star Heart's Fury to double-down on that fun, fairly unique effect. Stacks WOULD have to fall off over time though, or this could quickly become oppressive.

Piercing Strike is fine, but doesn't feel like it pierces, since it's magic damage and more stacks. Might want to make it strike in a line, or deal some True damage, or cut through Armor for a second or two to sell that fantasy.

Depredating arc (Hammer)

Delyora strikes the ground in front of him dealing 50/70/90/110/130 (+30% AD)(+6% of Delyoras Max health) physical damage in a cone and applies a stack of starfire to all enemy units in the area leaving behind a patch of unstable starfire on the ground. After .75 seconds, the starfire erupts dealing 50/70/90/110/130 (+35% AP) (+6% of Delyoras Max health) magic damage.

If an enemy champion with 4 or more stacks of starfire is in the area when it erupts, Delyora gains a shield for up to 100/175/250/325/400 (+15% of of Delyoras Max health) damage for a few 2 seconds scaling with the highest amount of stacks among enemy units in the zone.

So this is sort of a modern Poppy Q with some max health damage and a potentially large shield. I'm a little concerned about the 260+12% maximum health + scaling damage on a 6 second cooldown (down to about 3.8 with 40% CDR) though. That's a REALLY durable brawler. Otherwise I don't see anything inherently wrong with this, although it's SUPER close to Poppy's Q. Possibly too close.

Incising Strike (Sword)

Delyora strikes the ground in a line in front of him dealing 80/110/140/170/200 (+85% AD) physical damage to all enemies hit. If a unit hit is inflicted with one or more starfire stacks, incising strike does a bonus 15% percentage of the initial damage as magic damage for each stack of starfire consumed on the target.

If an enemy champion struck by incising strike is inflicted with 4 or more stacks of starfire, Delyora heals for 3% of his missing health (+5% of his bonus AP) per stack of starfire consumed.

Ouch. We're looking at a potential 90% damage increase, making that 380 + 153% AD damage to an enemy. That's possibly fine, but I'd have to see how fast those stacks crank up. The 18% missing health heal isn't that bad...until you remember this is the fast-attacking build, so we're looking at a likely 12-18% missing health every 16 seconds, on top of a build that likely already includes at LEAST BoRK. Might be a bit too much free sustain? Especially if he's manaless (which he...seems to be? I'm honestly not sure).

Celestial Flames

If I'm reading this right...you get no stacks of Starfire until you rank up your W? That seems weird. Also, do his item abilities could as active abilities for the purpose of consuming Starfire?

I'm also not sure I like being able to consume just 1-3 stacks of Starfire -- it means that using your low-cooldown Q at the wrong time can actually screw you up, which feels pretty bad. It might be better to let Starfire stack up to 6, and have breakpoints for consuming 3 Starfire and 6 Starfire, doing away with the smaller breakpoints. It also feels bad to consume Starfire as your Longsword form, as that loses you a TON of attack speed. Making abilities feel bad to use can be a warning sign.

Active- (Hammer) (Toggle on and Off)

Delyora surrounds himself with starfire, dealing 20/30/40/50/60 (+15% of Delyoras AP)(+1% of Delyoras max health) magic damage per second to all units in the area and applies one stack of starfire every 2/1.75/1.5/1.25/1 seconds to units hit.

If a Unit afflicted with 4 or more stacks of starfire is in the area when Celestial flames is toggled on, the starfire wraps itself around them, slowing them by 20% to 50% (scaling with the number of stacks on those hit) for 1.5 seconds.

It's a bit odd that this doesn't apply stacks every second. I also don't like that it only applies the slow when they're in the area the moment it's toggled -- the idea of turning it off and on mid-combat just to get a minor slow is disconcerting and feels like it would break the flow of the champion.

Also, is this guy resource gated? Or can this be maintained forever to become a pushing monster you can't ever go near?

Active- (Sword)

Delyora creates a disc of starfire and throws it out towards target location, dealing 70/100/130/160/190 (+90% AP) magic damage to the first enemy unit hit.

If an enemy champion hit was inflicted with 4 or more stacks of starfire, they take 15/20/25/30/35 (+3% of the targets current health) bonus magic damage per stack of starfire consumed over the next 5 seconds.

No real issues with this. It has some high damage potential, but the ability seems solid and numbers can be tuned. I guess I'm concerned it might be a little boring (so far this build has a basic AA reset, a line skillshot and...a line skillshot that hits the first enemy. Both skillshots only get more interesting if they hit a target with stacks, so only one can be interesting. Wheeeee).

CONTINUED...

THE RlVER KlNG1/1/2017, 2:41:28 AM1 votes

The dates for the CCOS have been extended, so you now have much more time to do whatever it is you need to do - edit your concept, enter a new one, what have you.