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[Champion Concept] Lone Starr, the Profiteer Protector

Ph0neS·10/4/2016, 2:20:46 AM·6 votes·1,291 views

Hey, so I was heavily encouraged by a friend to post a concept and participate in this month's CCOS so, uh, well, here I am and here's my concept: someone you hire to protect you from bounty hunters and other pirates.

For ease of judging Good Neighbors Bonus, here's other ccos champions I commented on: Ulric, The Moon's Shadow Aeri, the Hextech Medical Prodigy Samuels and Estabaan, the Host of Shadow Kruularion the Spectral Consumer Eshar, the Celestial Duelist Nim'rod, the Void Scum Elena, Herald of the Purge

Angelica 'Lone Starr' Reed, the Profiteer’s Protector

Reference image - roughly this: http://gelbooru.com//images/1a/a2/1aa237b2dafc40fe7ff68dd9526d2bd2.jpg

Role: Marksmen/adc was the overall intention, but she's comfy as a Top laner or Jungler too. Very flexible gal with many unique paths you can go with her. That was always something I wanted.

Health: 528 – 1871 Health regen.: 5.42 – 14.8 Mana: 280 – 824 Mana regen: 6.97 – 13.8 Move. speed: 325 Range: 550 Attack damage: 56.5 – 94.9 Attack speed: 0.658 (+ 0 – 56.6%) Armor: 21.2 – 79 Magic resist: 30

Abilities:

Passive - Heartseeker's Mark: When active, a Champion within 5.5 Teemos of Lone Starr gets marked with Heartseekers on Priceless. They take 10% extra damage from Lone Starr's attacks and her allies' attacks, increasing to 15% if the marked Champion is stunned.. The mark lasts for up to 8 seconds if Lone Starr fires on them with an autoattack or ability, but if the Champion is not attacked within four seconds then Heartseeker's Mark ends early. Heartseeker's Mark has a cooldown for 18/14/10 seconds, reducing at levels 7 and 13, between markings.

Q - Lead Lasso: Lone Starr draws a bead on a target and fires incessantly on them for up to five seconds or until the target leaves the 6 Teemo range, dealing (40/60/80/100/120 +100/110/120/130/140/150% AD) physical damage per second. Mechnically, this works like a channeled tether. Champions caught in the line of fire/tether range between Starr and her target takes 75% of the damage dealt by Lead Lasso. Costs 50/65/80/95/110 Mana per use. Cooldown: 8/7/6/5/4 seconds.

W - Fly By Night: Leaps across up to a 8 Teemo long and 1 Teemo wide line in a twirl while shooting Priceless down at targets below for (30/60/90/120/150 + 70% AD scaling) between her starting point and landing point. This costs 90 mana and mechanically works like an aerial dash with a damage component, so she can jump over walls and whatnot. The damage goes on for the full range of the ability, even if Lone Starr does not leap that far. Cooldown: 18/17/16/15/14 seconds.

E - Friendship Rounds: Loads Priceless with rounds that, as a toggleable active that costs 20/22/24/26/28 mana per shot, slow the target hit by (10/15/20/25/30%) for 2 seconds. If hit four times in a row, the target is stunned for 0.5/0.6/0.7/0.8/0.9 seconds. This stun cannot happen to the same target more than once per four seconds.

R - Fancy Shooting: Fires a salvo of shots from Priceless in a straight line, dealing (150/350/500 + 100% AD) damage and costs 110 mana with a range of 20 Teemos long and 1.5 Teemos wide. Every Champion hit extends the range of the attack by 20% and increases the damage dealt to subsequent Champions by 25%. Cooldown: 120/105/90 seconds.

As a disclaimer, I've never written a lore before and don't know too much about league lore. HOPEFULLY, however, this is pretty okay. Lore in short: Bilgewater mercenary that makes her money by protects sailing ships, sometimes skims off the top of whatever they made if she deems it appropriate. Hey, all's fair as long as they're all alive, right?

--

Lore in long: It was a dark and stormy night – or, at least, it would be after the ship landed in port. For right now, from the cabin’s view, the weather seemed fairly relaxed around The Lucky Coin and that, for once, was quite a break indeed given the last afternoon timing. Old wood and slightly rusting steel creaked in a chorus both soothing and ominous, alerting the cabin’s occupant to an impending arrival. Rifle strapped up and bottle of rum at the desk, this woman seemed more interested in writing a journal entry in a leather-bound book than actually heeding the warning. When the door opened, however, a dulcet, if smug, voice met the intrusion even as she kept writing.

“Captain.”

“We had a deal, Starr.” The Lucky Coin’s captain had already balled a fist, growling out his words. “Two hundred and fifty coin. No more, no less.”

There was a pause in Lone Starr’s writing, though not long. “And?”

“That was a fifth o’what we found in those ruins. And yet, every time we count it out and divide it up, Starr,” The captain spat both the name and onto the cabin floor. “My boys and I come out with you pocketin’ more than that.”

When the captain finished speaking, Lone Starr nodded slowly, set her pen down, and strapped up her journal. “Well captain, I’m sorry, but I was not hired to protect you from poor mathematicians.” Having stood up, the Profiteer’s Protector put her hands on the chair and met the Captain’s eyelid-twitching gaze with a smile unbefitting the situation.

“We counted the loot five times, Starr. Who do you take me for?” A hand on the captain sunk low and to the hip.

“Not a fool, certainly. You remember how, during our excursion,” A gleam twinkled in the Protector’s eyes. “It was your leadership that helped a great deal in fighting that terrible kraken. Your men would have been like leaves in the wind and, well,” Lone Starr rolled her shoulders, hands open and outstretched. “I’m just one gal with a gun.” The shadow of her hat didn’t hide the self-serving grin on her face.

“So what’s your poin-“

“You also remember,” Lone Starr continued, voice louder even as the rest of her seemed to recline. “How we found a burrowing worm at least twice the ship’s size, I’m sure, Captain, and how I,” The Protector paused, emphasizing that last word. “Helped you bring that beast down. I saw the fear in your eyes, Captain, trusting the ground even less than most pirates usually do. All that panic, screaming, the frantic orders left half-heard and poorly executed, and so many lives that could have been left to die in the sands of a forgotten island from the Rune Wars. But y’know what, Captain?” After a rhetorical pause, Lone Starr stared right into his eyes. “Not a single man died on my watch. Now, considering my job does not entail protecting you from sea monsters or monsters found on-site, I’d say that’s a bang-up job.”

Throughout, however, the captain’s tapping foot and twitching muscles gave way to a more obvious response. “Where’s the seventy-five coin, Starr?” Taking a step forward, the captain took his pistol in one hand and held it.

In response to the question, Lone Starr slid her rifle onto her front and shook her head. “Just a hazard fee for ol’ Priceless and me. You’ll be selling the carcasses anyway and make a tidy sum I won’t see a bit of, so it isn’t really worth a ruckus, is it?”

The two stared each other down for what felt like an eternity, fingers hovering around their respective triggers. Every silent second that passed, Lone Starr seemed to grow a more and more cocksure grin. “I know how to sail.” Broke the silence like a gunshot.

Eventually, the captain let go of his pistol. “You play a dangerous game, Starr.”

“That’s the fun kind, captain.”

If people want, I can do other things like taunts, jokes, and whatnot, but for now I'm just gonna post this.

16 Comments

Yordle Hentai10/4/2016, 2:41:19 AM1 votes

Ha weab! jk, I find your champion to be a fairly interesting. However, the range on her q and passive is abysmal, she's going to be destroyed in lane for it. The passive is also pretty useless once team-fights start since you do not want to be that close. The has a decent range or maybe a little too long (hard to visualize 8 teemos). Based on your description the ult seems to be a more accesible, but slightly weaker jhin ult in terms of range and utility. Her e is kind of boring and does not synergize that well with her kit as her kit seems to lean towards a high ad build, but the e tries to make you lean more to a high attack speed build. Btw make sure to note it doesn't work with runaan's, 3 man aoe stun every 4 autos is not fun. overall, I do think you're up to something here.

Friendly Ram10/4/2016, 3:28:21 AM1 votes

the passive is kinda strong atm but really interesting i like the idea of rewarding agression but team damage multiplication seems too strong. Q This seems like a lot of fun to play around with but would reccomend a higher cooldown or make it only up to her aa range. 3 sec farming time for enemies is really rude. W how long would the damage area be on the hop? dash with aoe damage on an adc is unique E I like this one. small cc and big payoffs. i'd hate to face this gal and braum in lane. R huh feels kinda like jhin w to me. when you say salvo does the entire combo deal the damage or is there a calculation per bullet? She definitley feel unique enough. not too sure on some of the execution but love the concept. Just as a disclaimer i'm a support main so if i'm missing anything adc mains would know please tell.

Rockman10/4/2016, 4:49:22 AM1 votes

You understand 1 Teemo is 100 units right

2k units on her ult is crazy

Rockman10/4/2016, 5:56:33 AM1 votes

Alright as long as you understand that let me give you actual feedback.

The utility to increase ally damage shouldn't exist on a marksman unless it massively gated like Corki E or an item like Black Cleaver.

Q is more in line with a minigun (Tychus from HotS) than a rifle.

W needs more gameplay than being ~Corki W

Mini stuns are largely pointless in this game.

Lastly you have no way to set up a successful ult in the kit. If you make a high CD aoe line skillshot that relies on hitting multiples to do good damage you need ways for her to be successful other than "Enemy messed up." Ezreal doesn't need that because he wants to control who gets hit first. You née to control who gets hit last. How is it fancy shooting if she doesn't bounce bullets smh

Nami in Bush10/4/2016, 10:51:36 AM1 votes

weeb

LBmyBB10/5/2016, 1:47:47 AM1 votes

Shes looks kinda like caitlyn

Villainous10/13/2016, 1:02:13 PM1 votes

No lore in this review, not my forte.

First Thoughts The two champions who come to mind are Corki and Caitlyn; it feels like she falls into the same 'Caster ADC' trap as them without the same ways of pulling herself out. She doesn't seem to have Corki's (theoretically) killer mid game/playmaking power and she doesn't have the natural long range and utility of Caitlyn.

Passive - Heartseeker's Mark The comparison I immediately draw is Quinn's Harrier, but it's a reasonably long duration damage amp, rather than a single burst of damage. Not bad conceptually, but I think it could be added to, all things considered. With her limited ability trigger the stun portion (since she only gets a 0.9 second stun), I think there's probably better choices for the extra damage trigger. Maybe give it an increasing damage amp/duration every time she deals damage to the target?

Q - Lead Lasso In its current state, I'm not a fan of this ability. There's this unfortunate question that always comes up when it comes to ADC damage abilities, especially ones that require heavy time invested in casting or channelling.

Why not auto-attack?

There's usually three things that redeem an ADC damage ability. Range, AOE and Utility. Most staple ADC abilities will have 2/3; Mystic Shot has Range and Utility, Piltover Peacemaker has Range and AOE, Explosive Shot has AOE and Utility (i.e. turret damage). Sometimes, you have a passive that rewards you for casting spells, like Rising Spell Force on Ezreal, or Lightslinger on Lucian. Lead Lasso is a pure damage, single target ability with barely more range than your auto-attack. It forces you to stand in place for up to five seconds; time you could easily spend AAing and kiting. In fact, one could look at Lead Lasso less as a damage ability and more as an AA 'steroid' that gives you 120 bonus damage and 50% extra AD, but sets your AS at 1.0 and you can't crit or apply on-hit effects (like one of your own abilities). And you can only target one person. And you can't move while using it. And you lose it if your target leaves 600 range. Excuse me if it'd prefer Rapid Fire.

I think I see where you were going with this as part of her kit; you jump in close, slow/stun them then hit them with the Lasso when they can't get away... But Lead Lasso isn't Drain and Elena isn't Fiddlesticks. Lead Lasso doesn't grant an absurd amount of healing and Elena doesn't have any supplementary damage she can make use of while channelling (like Fid can with Crowstorm), nor the crowd control to give herself any leeway. The number of champions in the game who can't either interrupt her channel, instantly leave the tether range or simply kill her while she sits there is actually not that large. It's mostly other ADCs, most of whom will be accompanied by a support who can break the tether (unless it's Karma, who's happy for you to stay locked in play anyway).

My apologies if that was overly critical, but abilities like this frustrate me greatly. My suggestion; either put some utility on this that gives her a reason to sit in place for X seconds (aside from raw numbers) or scrap it.

W - Fly By Night It's fine. Numerically, it's too powerful and it's a little vanilla, but it's mostly fine. In terms of pure stats, it's better than Corki's but worse than Tristana's. If she's the kind of champion who needs to use her dash to get into the fight, as opposed to champions like Ezreal who can reserve theirs' for escaping, then it's fine if it's a little more potent. It could probably do with something to spice it up; maybe some kind of additional effect when you hit an enemy with it since, unless there's something about

E - Friendship Rounds I honestly don't mind this too much, though I think it would be better as a 'your next 4 shots slow and the last one stuns'; more like Sivir's Ricochet (maybe something like 25% slow -> 50% slow -> 75% slow -> Stun? -shrugs-), if you will. As it stands, it clashes horribly with Lead Lasso; you can either AA and apply these, or you Lead Lasso and ignore everything else. Which really makes Lead Lasso even less appealing once you get past the 10 minute mark.

I also don't entirely understand the logic behind this ability's effect. What are 'Friendship Rounds', why do they apply a slow (as opposed to Frost Arrows which applied a slow because cold = slow in video game logic) and why do they stun on the fourth hit?

Ultimate - Fancy Shooting Hmm...

I feel Fancy Shooting is... Needlessly counter-intuitive as an ability on a champion who doesn't seem to specifically be based around deception/trickery (I could excuse it if she was). Especially in relation to how hyper long range skill shots work in League, especially the kind used by ADCs.

Consider the ultimates of Ashe, Draven, Ezreal, Caitlyn, Jhin and Jinx. The ADCs with the 'sniper' ultimates. The thing league teaches you to do against them is for the guy who's not in danger to body block for the guy who is; it either stops the attack in place, or reduces the damage. Maybe you make your ADC mad if it's a Jinx rocket and it blows up on your face and they're hit by the splash. For an ability to punish people for doing the thing they're 'taught', on a champion who otherwise seems like a pretty standard ADC? It doesn't feel right. If she's meant to be the kind of champion who nabs kills with that kind of mental trickery, you might want to communicate it better in the rest of her kit. That aside, it's another ADC sniper ultimate. I don't know the projectile speed, but with 2k range, it's probably fine so long as it isn't instant.

Overview Lead Lasso stands out like a sore thumb. The rest of her kit is maybe a little vanilla, but mostly pretty well accepted Marksman fare; escape, kit tool, snipe ult (even if the ult's a bit iffy on the range extension/damage boost on in), minor damage boost passive, which is where my initial Cait comparison came from. Unfortunately, her utility is much weaker than Cait and she doesn't have the same range that carries her late game. Nor that of Corki, actually, who can poke and burst with his spells. She isn't durable/bursty like Graves to compensate for her middling range and, for utility, she's mostly worse than Jhin, let alone Ashe. Aside from my problems with that one ability, Lone Starr seems to lack an identity in her kit. I can't tell what she's meant to be strong at or weak at. I take back what I said in my first thoughts; she doesn't feel like a caster. Her E says kiting based AA focused adc, her Q says caster, her W, ult and passive could be anything; her W and passive say 'aggressive' and little else, but her ult could be on just about any kind of ADC. She kinda just does a little bit of everything. She could really do with better focus. If she's meant to be the kind of all-in 'dash towards the enemy team' ADC like her Q kinda implies, she probably needs tools to not actually die when she does that.

Again, apologies if I was a little overly critical there; I try to give honest critique as best I can. If you have time, I'd appreciate it if you might take a look at my own champion here.