[Champion Concept] Umbra, The Dark Servant

Candurill·5/9/2016, 10:32:46 PM·27 votes·4,550 views

HEY!!! Welcome and thanks for wanting to read about my new champion concept. This whole thing is actually a work in progress and more of an experiment for me, so be patient. Don’t just disregard the rest of the concept if you’ve read the start of it (cus some of you will be appalled by the idea of this champion...) and just read it through :) I hope you’ll like it!!

This concept is a contender in the Community Concept Open Stage (CCOS).

CCOS good neighbour bonus:

BowieTheNifty: Rosari, The Living Conduit. Feedback Follow up

Vorazun: Skyla, A Soul Divided. Feedback

Raxistaicho: Medeia, the Shadow in the Woods Feedback

Identity:

Name: Umbra Race: Darkin Gender: Unknown (presumed male) Affiliation: whoever bears the Dark Oathblade...

[img]http://s32.postimg.org/y3w6okm8l/Umbra.jpg[/img]

Appearance: Much like the picture (NOT my art...I can’t draw...). He should have an eerie feel to him. He is a mysterious and strange creature who’s character should be just as mysterious as his appearance. He should make weird clicking, scraping and breathing noises when walking and attacking.


Kit:

**Champion intention: ** Umbra is a new kind of support, one that has the characteristics of an assassin. He is built only for death, which it sows by the command of the Bearer. With the unique item called “The Dark Oathblade”, Umbra can team up with his allies and deal massive amounts of damage to his enemies. The term “Kill Lane” will get a whole new meaning... Now before you scroll down to the comment section complaining about how this will never work because then the support will steal kills, can’t build anything else but damage, should have Mana, yada yada yada... consider this: AD support is indeed not a thing...yet... But it does not mean that it will never be. If riot would ever bring out an AD support champion, they would probably introduce AD support items. I believe that that would make for an awesome new play style, maybe even a new support game (like Sustain, Kill and Poke). This whole concept is like an experiment for me, aimed at bringing the idea of an AD assassin support to your attention...

Health 579 - 1939 Attack Damage 55 - 113 Health Regen. 7.1 - 18.1 Attack Speed 0.644 (+0% - 35.7%) Armor 26.9 - 86.4 Magic Res. 32.1 - 53.4 Melee Range 125 Mov. Speed 345

http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/resource_images/18/icons_17044_btn.jpg **Passive, Umbra’s Ritual: ** Umbra starts the game with an “Oath Blade” button above his inventory. This item can be given to any allied champion, making them “The Bearer”. This item will not show up in the inventory of the Bearer but as an additional button (similar to Kindred Passive). Once a champion Bears the Oathblade, it cannot be retrieved until he or she dies, in which case it is returned to Umbra and can then be given to any living ally. The blade will give the Bearer and Umbra some stats based on Umbra's level when they are within 1000 units of each other. It will also give the Bearer a passive effect and an active effect.

http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/resource_images/10/icons_9304_btn.jpg **Umbra’s Oathblade: ** From LVL 1: 12% (+1% per level Umbra gains) of Umbra’s Bonus Attack Damage (max 30%) From LVL 6: 9% (+1% per level Umbra gains) bonus Attack Speed (max 20%) From LVL 11: 5.5% (+0.5% per level Umbra gains) Critical Strike Chance (max 10%) From LVL 16: 10% bonus Crit Damage **UNIQUE passive, Umbra’s Boon: ** Whenever The Bearer and Umbra are in each others effect range (1000 units) and take down an enemy together, both of them will gain kill gold and experience. Minions and Monsters killed by one, but damaged by both will grant the other half the kill gold and experience. UNIQUE active, Kill Order: 40 second cooldown Whenever The Bearer and Umbra are in each others effect range (1000 units), The bearer can activate the Oathblade. The Bearer marks a target enemy champion or monster for 5 seconds. Umbra will deal 15% of any physical damage he deals as bonus true damage to the marked target. However, Umbra cannot deal lethal damage to the target, leaving it with 1% of its maximum health and nullifying any additional damage Umbra inflicts on the marked target. In stead, the damage dealt will slow the target by 10% per 100 damage for 1.5 seconds. If the Bearer dies or leaves the effect range around the Marked target, the Mark will disappear.

http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/resource_images/17/icons_16946_btn.jpg Q, Dark Shards **Cooldown: ** 15 / 14 / 13 / 12 / 11 seconds **Passive: ** When Umbra is not dealing damage for at least 2 seconds, he will start creating Shards of Pure Darkness at a rate of 1 per 10 / 8 / 6 / 4 / 2 seconds, which will stack up to 4 Shards. Once a Shard is ready, it can be thrown as a ranged auto attack at any target within a 500 unit radius, dealing 40% / 45% / 50% / 55% / 60% of Umbra's AD in Physical Damage. Readied shards can be fired rapidly after one another at double Umbra’s attack speed (can break through the usual attack speed cap). Dark Shards are considered auto attacks and thus apply on hit effects. When a Dark Shard lands a critical hit, the target is slowed by a total of 15% / 17.5% / 20% / 22.5% / 25%. The slow will last 0.5 seconds for every Shard that hits them within 2 seconds of the first, making the target immune to the effect for 5 seconds afterwards. **Active: ** Umbra energises a readied shard and swiftly flings it in a straight line, embedding it into the first enemy unit it meets, dealing 60 / 85 / 110 / 135 / 160 (+ 60% AD) in Physical damage and breaking any form of shielding effect that an enemy benefits from at that time. Reactivating this ability early will pull the shard out, dealing an additional 25% of the original damage dealt in physical damage, slowing the target by 40% / 45% / 50% / 55% / 60% for 1.5 seconds.

http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/resource_images/12/icons_11456_btn.jpg **W, Thirsting Steel: ** **Cooldown: ** 16 seconds **Active: ** Umbra lashes out with his weapon, resetting his auto attacks and dealing normal attack damage, plus 5% / 15% / 20% / 25% / 30% of his AD as bonus Physical damage in a short but broad cone in front of him. 50% of the bonus damage dealt is healed to Umbra over a period of 2 seconds. When this ability hits an enemy Champion Marked by the Bearer or Embedded with a Dark Shard, the cooldown is reduced by 8 seconds. Whenever the Bearer and Umbra are within effect range of each-other (1000 units), the healing done by Umbra with this ability will be shared with the Bearer.

http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/resource_images/8/icons_7590_btn.jpg **E, Closing In: ** **Cooldown: ** 16 / 15 / 14 / 13 / 12 seconds **Active: ** Umbra channels for 0.5 seconds, after which he will dash towards the cursor for 2.5 seconds (moving the cursor thus changes his direction) with twice his movement speed (includes bonuses he benefits from at the time of casting). During the dash he will rip through any enemy unit he meets, dealing 60 / 85 / 110 / 135 / 160 (+ 50% AD + 25% dashing speed) Physical damage but slowing down for 5% per enemy. The dash can be cancelled prematurely by reactivating the ability, dashing into terrain or encountering an enemy champion.

http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/resource_images/7/icons_6495_btn.jpg **R, Loyal Servant: ** **Cooldown: ** 180 / 150 / 120 seconds **Range: ** Global **Passive: ** Umbra gains 50 / 65 / 80 (+ 30% bonus AD) movement speed whenever he moves towards the Bearer, wherever he or she may be on the map. **Active: ** Umbra dashes towards the Bearer’s side at great speed. Any enemy hit by Umbra on his way will be dealt 150 / 250 / 350 (+ 80% AD + 20% of missing health) in Physical Damage. If Umbra and the Bearer are within their effect radius (1000 units) upon activation, the cooldown for this ability is halved.


Gameplay:

General: Like I said, Umbra is a new type of support. While the sustain support mainly focusses on healing, the poke support focusses on zoning and peeling and the kill support mainly focusses on laying down kills for the ADC, Umbra is made to actually go in on the behest of the ADC, and deal tons of damage himself. It is then up to their teamwork to decide who gets the kill. It does not matter game wise, since Umbra's passive allows both of them to gain the kill gold and XP. When in the laning phase, Umbra's role is comparable to that of a poke support. With the passive on his Q "Dark Shards" he can poke the enemy botlane and punish any poke they attempt to inflict on him. This ability is probably the first one an Umbra player should take at the start of the game. Another option would be his E, "Thirsting Steel" which could give him and his ADC some sustain, though in the early levels of the ability, the healing done by this ability is pretty much negligible. The main goal in this part of the game is to come through it as unscathed as possible, since without his abilities or some manner of built damage, Umbra is not that strong yet. It's later in the laning phase that Umbra truly shines. Being able to close in on an out of position enemy champion with his W "Closing In". He can also initiate with his "Dark Shards", break through any shielding effect and use the second active to slow the target before engaging. This however, comes at the cost of the special effect of his "Thirsting Steel" which decreases its cooldown when hitting an enemy embedded with a shard. Once engaged and close to an enemy, it is key for Umbra to stay with said enemy, and deal damage with his auto attacks and his "Thirsting Steel" ability. The ADC can then follow up and throw in some CC of their own if possible or just go in guns blazing. It is crucial for this champion that he can cooperate well with his ADC. His ultimate "Loyal Servant" will make him dash towards the Bearer (presumably the ADC in this stage of the game) and functions as an execute when hitting enemies on the way. This only works however, if his ADC positions themselves correctly. Once the laning phase is over, Umbra can go off on his own for a bit. His role then changes into more of a normal assassin champion, waiting on the sidelines and taking down targets when they are out of position. "Loyal Servant" allows him to react quickly when the ADC (or whomever is the Bearer) is in trouble and is in need of help.

Combinations: Umbra has no truly strong CC on his own. He has a minor slow on his Q, but that comes at a price of a secondary effect on his W. Even though he has a lot of gap closing capability, he would still need to keep the enemy close enough to allow the ADC to catch up. Therefore, Umbra would work best with Marksmen that have their own CC. For example:

Ashe has a lot of CC of her own. She slows with he aa's, stuns with her ult and offers some vision for fighting near a bush. This compliments Umbra's close in and kill tactic very well.

Caitlyn has her traps, which once activated will allow Umbra to jump on their enemies instantly. His Q will then be enough to slow the enemy down enough for them to wrap up the kill.

MissFortune has a powerful slow. When an enemy is caught in it, Umbra has an easy time to initiate an attack and deal some initial damage. Slow the enemy down with a Q, and a kill is almost assured.

Champions that have no CC, like Ezreal and Sivir for example, will have a harder time working well with Umbra.

Countering Umbra pretty much calls for the same ammo. Hard CC will stop Umbra from getting close and healing up with "Thirsting Steel". Champions like Ashe with a stun or Vayne with a knock back, are especially strong against this champion.

Items: There are no AD based support items yet, so I can't really give anything perfect. There are some items that could work supportively however. item 3022, item 3184 and item 3110 Would allow him to slow the enemy down whenever he attacks them, activates the item or stands next to them, while giving him some more tankyess to survive in the heat of battle. item 3046 Would give him some more mobility options, plus the unit collision ignoring is very useful for his role. item 3142 and item 3153 Would give him some damage and the actives give him movement speed. Activate these while close to enemies and they won't be able to get away. item 3094 Would make his poke range for his Q larger, allowing for a more annoying laning-phase. item 3156, item 3139 and item 3072 Would allow him to survive in the middle of a teamfight by forming shields, cleansing CC and giving him some more damage at the same time.


Lore: (Work in progress!!!)

Report on Umbra from "Legendary beings of Valoran." - By Candurill Gellius, schollar and historian at the Royal Acadamy of Demacia.

The mystery surrounding the Darkin race is one that has persisted through ages of study. Very few of these creatures remain, yet they have left their mark on many historical moments through war and bloodshed...History tells of only 5 Darkin...One is Aatrox, another is Umbra... Akin to Aatrox in little but name and shared passion for battle, this being is more a creature then a real entity. Where Aatrox was said to fight elegantly and inspired bravery, Umbra fights without style or elegance and inspires naught but fear in the hearts of both his allies and his enemies. Where Aatrox has his blade fused with him at all times, Umbra's blade is fused to him through his soul, in stead of physically. Umbra's purpose was never to win wars on the battlefront, but in the shadows behind it. Many stories are told of people that had meant nothing, until the Oathblade came into their possession. With this blade, they were able to command this creature and stand in its fearsome glory for as long as they could keep it...But, as it so happens, mankind is a petty lot...and no man ever held on to the blade for very long... The blade and the creature have surfaced many times in history, serving anyone from high Noxian military officials and Demacian nobility, to mercenaries from the Voodoo lands and tribe elders in the Kumungu Jungle...But one of the most popular accounts is one during a civil war between two sides of a civilisation that existed where Zaun and Piltover now thrive. Both sides had their faults and their greatness, but war was bringing neither anything more then despair and sadness. In the end, it is said that Umbra had a hand in ending the bloodshed....The story goes as follows:

On a warm summers eve, a man came into town. He was a merchant of rare, antique artefacts, or so he said himself. And among his merchandise, a slender and elegantly embroiled blade, wrapped in a satin cloth. "With this blade..." the man spoke "A man could bring down any enemy, by simply speaking the words...". Many a man was fascinated by the idea, but only one of them actually stood up to buy the artefact. A young nobleman stepped forward and told the merchant that he was interested in buying this said magic blade. The merchant smiled and took the man's gold. But before he handed the blade over to the man, the merchant pulled him close and whispered into his ear. "Know what you have bought young man...Power is a burden under which many a man have caved...Use it wisely, but be weary of those around you...". The merchant then handed over the blade. He then declared to be packing up and leaving at first light. The man with the blade stood there looking at his purchase. He did not notice how some men looked at him with greed in their eyes... Many days later, the conflict between the two sides would come to a climax. A battle would determine who would run the town, but before the winner could take its place, blood would have to be spilled... The man saw this. He knew that many would perish and that he might even be among those that would. There was only one way this could be avoided. If there was only one contender... The warning of the merchant was still heavy in his heart, thus the man had never removed the blade from its cloth. But this was the only sure way to stop the fighting. Sometimes, one death can save many. He took the blade in his hand for the first time. He felt the blade pulse with an eerie energy. "Creature of darkness..." the man commanded "Come to me." As soon as he had spoken the words, a rattling breath was heard. The man turned around and stared directly into the cold glowing eyes of a dark creature. His heart throbbed in his throat for a second, but his determination did not waver. "Kill their leader, for only then will the bloodshed cease...". The creature did not make a sound that confirmed if it had understood the man, but he knew the creature had. He felt a connection with the creature, one stronger then he had with even his family members. It was as if it was a part of him now, through the bare metal that touched his flesh. The creature turned towards the door and without a sound it left the house... The next day, the streets buzzed with excitement. Apparently one of the leaders had perished by the hand of an unknown assailant, leaving the other side as winner. The nobleman smiled. He had saved many lives last night... To his dismay however, the bloodshed did not cease... The leader that the man had rooted for turned out a tyrant. He riled up all the men and woman that had sided with his enemy and executed them one by one. The nobleman was distraught...He had caused this...Thus he had to end it...again he grabbed the blade and spoke the words, sending the creature on its way, this time to end the life of the tyrant that now ruled the region. It made its way through the streets, seen by nobody, moving from shadow to shadow. As he approached the tyrant in his room, scraping metal was heard as it grabbed for his crude weapon. He lifted it, ready to strike, the tyrant trembling in fear...But then the creature halted. Still as a statue it stood there, while the tyrant soiled himself. The creature suddenly lowered his weapon and retreated into the shadows. The next day the streets were abuzz with the latest news...Apparently a young nobleman had died at the hand of a unknown assailant...Next to him, lay a black satin cloth... Rumour had it that it was the same young man that had bought the magic blade that merchant had offered many days ago...

There is historical evidence of this civilisation existing. Old texts speak of a cruel king that ruled the land there for many years, who spilled blood as if it was nothing. Umbra however, was never mentioned... The story however, is used as an analogy of the burden of power. Often the blade and the creature that comes with it is a synonym for the power of the law to end a life of a criminal. Other times the story is used to tell of the jealousy of man, telling that power always attracts unwanted attention...

Running. Always running. I cannot take it anymore. There is no time or place safe from the horror that hunts me. How could I have been so careless? They all said that angering the him would cost me more then my life, but did I listen? No. I did not think it was that bad, that he was just a man with great influence. I thought that if I fled the city he would not be able to get to me. At first this seemed to be the case. I got out with the gold in my pocket without even the other men noticing anything. But then...The scraping of metal, the rattling breath....and the searing pain of dark fire embedded in my very soul... I have been running ever since. Let this be a warning for anyone out there. I can hear it coming, yet I am too tired to keep running. This thing is horror and pain incarnate. It won’t stop and it does not tire. The only thing that can halt it is that damned dagger... These are my final words. Let them be a warning to all. Do not mess with the Bearer of Umbra’s Oathblade, for that will surely be y-” A scrap of paper besmirched with blood. The writer was never found.

Quotes: Umbra does not really "Say" anything. He makes metallic sounds, scraping, heavy breathing, grunting, etc.

53 Comments

CasterGilgamesh5/10/2016, 3:58:13 AM3 votes

At least some creations and concepts don't get down voted to hell but then again how do I know the owner of this post isn't just down voting

regonas5/10/2016, 7:29:03 PM2 votes

Gonna give you as it is. I seen several similar concepts to your over few months. Looks like you put them together, polished and presented as your own idea. That is not bad, but not very impressive.

Passive is pretty much overloaded heavily, but Jhin is already in the game, so nobody will ever be allowed to call champion suggestions as overloaded, if this thing got to live.

Q, W, E looks functional, but hidden OP. At first sight, i thought that most of these abilities are average, but when i delved deeper - those are super broken ones, when together with marked friendly champion. Assassin support works only if you get some farm, because as game goes on, you will fall heavily back. However, if you get enough farm/kills, with decent ADC you could score pentas to the right and the left. Hidden OP.

R, i don't get it. Global dash? Wow, no. Shen + your champion and pretty much jungler is forbidden from going bot.

Also, some more harsh truth: Digimon are better than pokemon.

Traxicus5/9/2016, 11:12:17 PM2 votes

A really cool idea! AD support is an underdeveloped (but not nonexistent) role, and this is a neat way to approach it. I think there are some feel/consistency changes in order:

  • Those Q shards recharge really fast. 2sec out of combat is barely anything at all, and if it recharges at his own attack speed that'll be near instant. One of those should be longer, or it's basically just always up.
  • Regarding the Q reactivation "breaking any form of shielding effect that an enemy benefits from" - that's problematic. I assume this includes stuff like morgana black shield, but what about kayle/taric ult? what about galio's shield, or Leona's? Many of these kind of effects are supposed to be guaranteed, and there shouldn't be something that can nullify that (see: QSS no longer nullifies zed/fiora/fizz/etc ults). What if it applied grievous wounds? That's simpler.
  • I don't think the W is worded clearly - does that augment his autoattacks? What exactly is that damage bonus based off of, his AD? Or does it scale with added-in on-hit effects? I also don't think it's a very interactive ability. It seems sort of like an afterthought to the rest of his kit.
  • Typically, channel times (especially on non-ultimate abilities) shouldn't change drastically by level, because that alters how it feels to use, even though it's technically easier/better it could be jarring. It's better to keep that constant and have the effectiveness of what happens after the channel be what scales.
  • The E as a whole feels too similar to the ult. Two of his abilities are reckless charges that damage enemies on the way - is that what he's about? Is the the Flash of Runeterra? I have a hunch that's not the case. I'd encourage you to think on it more - it's promising so far!
Candurill5/14/2018, 6:44:59 PM2 votes

Pyke very much has the same feel as Umbra ^^

regonas5/10/2016, 12:06:57 PM2 votes

Do you want harsh truth or pleasant lies?

Candurill5/24/2016, 6:17:26 PM1 votes

I added some Lore ^^ it's...well it's not my best work ever...but its something ^^

Vorazun5/30/2016, 2:33:44 AM1 votes

Kit Overview

Passive: This is a pretty nice and newish mechanic you have here. Some pointers which stuck out to me though. Early crit chance - no. This is not the best idea because you could arguably get a lucky crit on your opponent, perhaps winning you the lane because of it while trading. IT's not fun to play around. I would suggest reshuffling the stats that are presented here to perhaps the AD or the AS would be must better since it makes your laning phase much less dependent on RNG which is unfun given that no-one likes laning against Tryndamere for this reason. As to the passive kill mechanic...I feel that this is far too good gold generation, particularly given the Q passive (more on that later) The experience in particular is what worries me - it's what made post rework Morde so powerful, as it almost always guarentees a level advantage. This combined with how snowbally your champion gets could be very overbearing. This is arguably compensated by the lack of a suitable support item (Targons is probably your best bet) but I don't believe it fully makes up for it.

Q: Passive certainly is interesting, but also provides too much safety, allowing him to proc his Oathblade Passive with little danger. As a snowball-orientated AD assassin support, it should definitely be more risky to play than it currently is. I would recommend changing it so that the activation is what gives him a limited amount of ranged attacks which apply a stacking slow, as that creates much better windows of opportunity than currently, where all he has to do is back off for a bit (and even then can afford to hit most of the minions in a wave, especially casters under tower)

W: The heal is very minimal given what it is, but it should also be noted that at 40% CDR, as long as the bearer attacks the same target you do, makes this ability have no cooldown. I assume that this champion is manaless given that there are no costs specified, but it also means that you gain the ability to do objectives like herald, Dragon or Baron as soon as you hit it. Lowering the CD reduction to something like 8 seconds instead of 10 would definitely go a long way in fixing the issues that are presented. I would also add that it gives him effectively infinite AA resets, so you could technically one-shot people as long as they are marked

E: This ability is pretty good, not much to mention except that the 5% slowdown per enemy is not significant, given that it stops at the first enemy champion hit.Unless you're somehow behind your enemy and they let you charge this up, I don't really see how that particular part of the mechanic is too useful.

R: Movespeed bonus is huge given it's GLOBAL (!!!) range. Limiting this to something like 2000 units would be preferable given that it makes you have to stay around your partner. It also feels too similaar to the E imo, and the damage component is very very situational. It would make him a very dangerous splitpush partner though as he could instantly join fights from anywhere across the map. Also the execute...is weird, because it would mean it is used as a finisher, while it generally feels far more like an initiation tool than anything.

In general this feels like a very creative design, but as to actually playing it - well it feels gimmicky as hell. Most of the power is tied up in the passive, and while you have a pseudo-juggernaut feel, the kit is very very very dependent on snowballing - more than Leona, as an inidication. The lack of any strong utility means that falling behind is a complete death sentence as you provide only a moderate slow on a long cooldown, and only damage outside of that. I will admit it's a very nicely crafted idea at that particularly the aesthetic you went for. Good luck in the CCOS!

Candurill6/13/2016, 12:25:09 PM1 votes

Bump :3

Vascord9/1/2016, 3:14:40 AM1 votes

Love that idea but i think some stats are to much stronge but it's a unique champ and that is a good idea ;p

FlameHalbrdOkido2/25/2018, 2:10:55 AM1 votes

This is REALLY cool, i do like the theme

FlameHalbrdOkido5/6/2018, 5:15:43 AM1 votes

hey u gonna respond or what?

Illiad5/9/2016, 10:36:48 PM1 votes

Will the passive give you anything else? that item slot it uses up in the late game becomes pretty costly if it just lets Umbra use his abilities

FlameHalbrdOkido9/19/2019, 8:47:38 PM1 votes

hey u still do concepts?

ShatteredSkys5/10/2016, 4:51:13 AM1 votes

Hey! ^_^ Firstly I want to say this is a pretty interesting concept and it's cool to see a AD assassin bot laner.

But I kind of need to say this.... There's are big reason why there are no AD supports. A) AD builds are expensive and you aren't going to be able to afford any decent items with a support budget. I know that the passive shares gold between champions and that's supposed to patch this flaw but I'm 100% sure that the passive is broken beyond belief I'll try to explain that in its appropriate time.

B) If you do cramp a assassin in the bot lane what's stopping me from playing him in the mid lane? Umbra has some high scaling I mean 20% of missing health on a basic ability is REALLY scary I mean Lee Sin only has an 8% missing health on his Q. 20% would execute any moderately low health champion. A LOT of supports become really oppressive when they go into solo lanes becasue their kits are designed to function with minimum gold and when they actually get gold well...... Just look at top lane Lulu or the old Ali top and jungle it becomes a mess pretty fast.

C)Why do we need AD supports? Why do I need to play an AD support when I have an AP one who can also CC and do the same burst as the AD one but can actually build properly? People pick supports for their utility/CC an AD assassin can not be allowed to have these things other wise well look at Ekko.

Passive: Like I mentioned earlier I'm 100% sure this passive is broken beyond belief and you can see this in past with Riot's various experiments. You know the item Relic Shield? Did you know when that item was first released it broke the game within the first 5 minutes? It pretty much allowed two champions to share a lane with pretty even gold which rendered jungling completely irrelevant. Or an even more recent example, rework Mordekaiser who would just straight up outlevel his opponent and crush them which was never fun to play against.

My point is that gold and experience are very hard mechanics to balance and in the past have caused MANY balance issues and I think Umbra would not be exempt from this.

Look forget about putting Umbra in the bot lane and imagine him in a solo lane and giving the blade to a solo laner or jungler. Umbra and whoever has the blade is essentially getting two lanes worth of exp and gold or with the jungler the jungler gets lane gold/experience AND the jungle as well. It's an interesting concept but I think you need to re balance it a bit. Yeah you lose out on certain buffs but you can always put it on the jungler and have him camp your lane which kind of negates that.

Combo?: Umbra honestly strikes me as a rather strange assassin. First of all his burst is fairly slow; without your R you E/Q-W than AA your oppoent down which is really slow..... Compare this to the other AD assassins: Talon can kill you in a second, Rengar can kill you in 0.2 seconds, Kha's isolated Q does 3/4 of an ADCs health bar and well Zed is Zed. Out side of his passive Umbra just feels lacking in terms of burst compared to other assassins. Also unlike others if he wants to ult he needs the guy with his sword to position themselves in a way for the dash to go through the target which really hampers his ability to take out a carry which makes him fairly unreliable for an assassin.

Lore: I personally think you have a pretty interesting lore concept, it would be interesting to see how Umbra acts with his bearer. I'll drop by again to read the rest later.

Overall: Alright time to wrap things up, I think you have an interesting kit but I think at the same time it needs some tweaking and re balancing. I'm pretty sure the passive is broken, I think his identity as assassin could be improved, and I think his kit could use some tweaks so it worked together or synergized with it self more. But anyway fairly decent idea can't wait to s see where you take this kit ^_^

Oh and if you're confident with this concept you might want to consider entering it into the CCOS. It's a monthly champion concept competition that pits your concept against various other to see how they do. You can find their thread on the concept thread usually during the middle of the month.

BowieTheNifty5/10/2016, 7:56:16 AM1 votes

Alright Canduril it is time for me to put my thoughts into this concept here. Honestly I know that you are going to be most likely entering this into the CCOS for this month. Figured I would get a head start on it for the bonus xD Nah I am just kidding. I personally like going over your concepts. Plus it has been awhile sense I have done so sense I took a little break from my concepts. Anyways lets get on with it.

Passive

So reading this massive wall of text took me a bit to take in. Though starting with this passive concerns me. Mainly it is due to it being transferred from inventory to inventory. Now in concept this is a cool idea I will admit. However when it comes to late game I have a problem with. Mainly it states that the sword can't be given back to Umbra. Not only this but that it is an item that is literally put into someones inventory by choice of the current holder. Plus what happens if a champion gets their hands on this Oath blade they get no benefit from it and they can't give it away due to every other team members inventory being full? There is a quite a bit of mechanical issues here that need to be resolved. Personally an item bouncing between champions isn't a bad idea but you would have to do some thing that doesn't limit building for other players.

For the passive item itself, the stats on it aren't too bad. Having it scale with Umbra's own levels is interesting. I can see why the bonus experience was added for the unique passive on the item. Though it having an active that targets enemies might be over doing it. You have the ability to target allies with the item to transfer already as an active. It might be good to simply rework the passive here as it feels clunky to me. Personal opinion.

Q

So passively for this ability it generates shards that gives Umbra ranged basic attacks and will gain them while out of combat. On top of it these shards are on rapid fire which I think visually is awesome. However this was a trend that I am seeing within this kit is about the scaling on certain things. For the first 2 ranks you would have two shards, rank 3 and 4 you would have three shards, and only gain a fourth shard upon maxing the ability. This is something I want to suggest for this. Make it a flat amount of shards he can hold for each rank. Instead you should focus on scaling the cool down for receiving each shard to be lower with each rank. For example at rank one you could have each shard come each 10 seconds while not attacking. Then scale it down to 2 seconds with the final rank. This way you don't have to worry about inconsistently scaling numbers for certain mechanics as much. For the active it isn't a bad ability. Sure the scaling needs to get looked at a bit on the missing health. Though personally I remove the slow from this ability. Being able to remove shields with the shard is strong and I like it. Instead you should have that be the main purpose to remove shields and prevent them on the target. That makes this ability unique and very strong, not in a bad way though. Or simply just switch the slow to the reactive portion of this ability and have the shield removal as the first effect.

W

This might be a typo but this ability is labeled as a toggle. From what it looks like it is far from a toggle. Anyways like with the Q's passive I see inconsistent, sorry but it urks me to no end xD. Don't be around to have abilities scale every level. Cause 5/5/10/10/15 is rather odd to play with as putting a point into that ability during some points adds very little benefit from it. Sure it lowers the cool down, but there isn't an increase to the usefulness for this ability at least for two ranks. Do you see what I am getting at? Other then that is it a nice form of sustain with added damage and even granting more benefit for being near the oath bearer.

E

Thematically and visually I love the idea for this ability. It makes it feel like this guy is literally coming in for the kill on you. Though with the good comes the bad. When I am looking at this kit I am noticing the scaling for the abilities. From what I see it is all over the place. You got this ability scaling with movement speed, the Q active scales with missing health, his W scales with damage he deals, though there is little reason to build damage as nothing scales with it. Honestly it doesn't flow well. I get that you are trying to get a new breed of AD support. What is being presented here currently I don't believe is the way to go about this. You have tank supports that build HP because it helps them tank. AP supports that bring utility but strengthen it by building AP. If you are wanting to go about an AD support wouldn't it make sense for them to be able to scale with AD? Sure he can build AD for the sake of his passive item, though that is the only major benefit to it. I don't mean to be critical here but to make this work you need to fix quite a bit. Now I didn't want to get off track there but it needed to be said.

R

For the ultimate you have another passive effect here. Increased movement speed towards the oath bearer. Not bad as it helps Umbra keep up and get back to his current bearer quickly. I can see how it can synergize with certain things. Especially mobility boots. Though in truth this is kinda redundant compared to its active. It is literally a global dash to his target. Sure it is nice to be able to deal damage to enemies Umbra passes through and can make some interesting plays. As well it is good to see that his AD stat gets used here. Halving the cool down if it is used within a certain distance isn't bad either. Still there is just something, that just doesn't have me sold. It just doesn't have that umph to it you know. When looking at this ability it just doesn't feel satisfying on paper. Personal opinion.

There is my little kit overview for Umbra here. Now don't take what I said to heart. I feel as though I may have been a bit harsh on this kit. Like I said I get you are looking to find a new breed of support, that being an AD support. Though I believe you tried to change too much of the formula at once with this one. Take it one step at a time when trying out newer things like this. I will admit there were things about this kit I enjoyed. While most of what I said may sound negative, thematically and visually this guy is awesome. I personally liked the Q and the E abilities, even if numbers/scaling needs to be looked at. If you ever have time feel to look at my last concept, Raseri, The Living Conduit

Onkel Malte5/10/2016, 10:15:13 PM1 votes

It's Like the assassin addition to Kallista. And an AD-Support. I like the general concept pretty much it's properly unique :)

Anyways here's a little critique: the crit chance on the passive is too low to be even taken into account. Either you balance it around the attack damage bonus or you get it out of there. It feels off to get three stats with one being barely noticeable. Also the % bonus AD could rather give flat damage as it takes a whole item slot The Q has so much similarity to Kallistas Rend that it is nearly boring. Maybe you can play around the AA-Range modification and make the increased range the active with an anti support effect as you had it before. You coulld make it ignore shields and appliy a similar effect as grievous wounds to reduce supportive effectiveness while it is stuck.

UnderscorBunnies5/17/2016, 4:39:34 PM1 votes

The only issue with this I see is Nocturne's passive already being called "Umbra Blades".