The Juggernaut Club: Part 13

In Targon, Garen walks out of Pantheon's bakery with Taric.

: So, Gems, what's the best roadway to Noxus from here?

: Well, all you have to do is go down that road there, pass through the Shurima Desert, and- Wait, What!? Why are you going to Noxus?

Garen opens his mouth to answer, but before he can Taric's eyes widen and he cuts Garen off

: OH NO! The Vision of your dead body being chained above the gates of Noxus! It's going to come true unless I stop you!

He tries to cast his E on Garen, forgetting that earlier, he had placed his W on him, thus rendering him immune. Pantheon exits the bakery, having locked the door behind him.

: Well, another successful day of living the dream. Now it's off to-

The bolt passes through Garen harmlessly, and Pantheon is struck by Taric's E instead, stunning him. He falls over flat on his face on the ground.

: OH NO, OH NO! I did it again! Leona's gonna KILL me!

Garen just watches as Taric is freaking out at having unintentionally stunned Pantheon into unconsciousness.

: Wait, again?

: IT'S A LONG STORY! NO TIME FOR IT NOW! SHE CAN'T SEE HIM LIKE THIS OR I'M TOAST!

Taric flings Pantheon's unconscious body over his shoulder and goes around to the back of the building, motioning Garen to follow him. After some hesitation, he does.

By the time he's caught up, Taric's gotten Pantheon's baker-attire off, and hands it to Garen. Garen's eyes widen as he realizes the intention.

: Oh no, no-no-no-no-no... you are NOT making me dress like him!

: Look, all you have to do is "masquerade" as him until he regains consciousness. It's not like Leona KNOWS what he looks like under that helmet, right? As a favor for an old buddy, would ya please?

Garen rolls his eyes.

: Fine, but you owe me one!

Leblanc, having seen Garen earlier when he, Taric, Diana and Pantheon were having their exchange of words inside the bakery, went off into the shadows, and using her magic, assumed his form. Thus, she did NOT see the happenings when Taric knocked the REAL Pantheon unconscious. Having very little knowledge of Garen to go on, other than that he is a seeming fanatic about Justice, she puffs out her chest as she walks into the light.

: Ha-ha! It is I, Garen, the um... Fright of Demacia, here to execute Justice upon Mount Targon!

Meanwhile, Garen comes out of the shadows behind the building, dressed in Pantheon's baker attire, while Taric carries Pantheon's still-unconscious body towards Pantheon's house. He sees "Garen" walking towards the heart of the village.

: And who in Justice's name is that?

He watches "Garen" start to cause trouble by picking fights with villagers, before the impostor turns and sees him dressed as "Pantheon".

: Oh crap! It's Pantheon, he's closed the bakery for the day! Better make myself scarce before he jumps and lands on my head!

"Garen" dashes away, revealing it's Leblanc! Garen smiles evilly.

: Well, well, what's good for the Goose is good for the Gander, Leblanc! Where's Leona?

He goes off to try and find where Leona has gone.

Back on the Shadow Isles, the members of the Juggernaut Club are still searching for a sea-worthy vessel to take them the remainder of the way to Ionia, or any alternate methods. They are suddenly approached by Kalista.

: Greetings, lost souls. Are there any among you that desire Vengeance against a betrayer? (Tone changes to pleading) Pretty-please? It's been so long since anyone picked me...

Mordekaiser comes forward.

: No, Kalista, no one's interested in you. You've been dumpstered here just as much as you have been in-game. Your Martial Poise ain't nothing to us Martial Boys.

: OOOOHHHH~

Kalista runs away, crying. Yorick comes up and gives Morde a fistbump. Karthus was about to approach them, but having seen the exchange, he floats away to avoid getting any harsh remarks.

The Club continues on, and what looks to be some form of light attracts everyone's attention. They follow it through some foliage, and when they get to the clearing, they see what it is.

There's a building with a large Neon-Sign reading "The Thresh Cream Parlor", complete with a Neon-sign version of Thresh scooping ice cream. The Kindred walk out of the building, holding an ice-cream cone that Lamb and Wolf alternate taking licks from.

: Where'd THIS come from?

: It wasn't here when we left!

: Hey Kindred, what flavor is that?

: That's NOT the important question here!

: Morde's right! The important question is... HOW MANY FLAVORS DOES HE SELL!?

Everyone runs into the establishment, except Yorick and Mordekaiser. Morde looks at Yorick, who shrugs his shoulders and goes inside like the others had done. After a moment or two, Morde sighs and follows suit.

Inside, everyone else has already gotten ice-cream ordered, and are eating it, with the exception of Draven, for obvious reasons. Then they look around, and see Ryze in a corner, eating a cone as well.

: Hey, what's Ryze doing here?

: Having ice-cream like us, it looks like.

: He probably means HOW did he get here.

: No, he probably means-

: No, I have a more important question. WHY isn't he getting attacked by the undead? I mean, Morde and Yorick are keeping them off us, but HE doesn't have that protection.

Having heard them speaking, Ryze turns to them. He silently gestures over his whole body.

: Pray tell, what is the HUE of my skin, Juggernauts?

Everyone: It's Blue.

: And, who ELSE has blue skin around here?

Yorick raises his hand and Ryze nods.

: Ergo, if HE Points at Yorick has blue skin and the undead leave HIM alone, if I Points back at himself have blue skin, then...

Everyone: Ooooohhh...

: Fair Point.

Darius finishes licking up the rest of his ice-cream cone as Draven watches with envy.

: OK, Morde, Yorick, I REALLY appreciate you two guiding us around here, it's really opened my eyes about this place, and considering that, I might be a bit more open with making a clubhouse here.

Both Morde and Yorick squeal in delight. Darius holds up a finger.

: BUT! That's not a guarantee. So, we still need to-

: Don't you mean a Garen-tee? Snickers

Darius sighs

: You know, if he were still in the Club, Garen would be looking at you PRETTY dryly about now.

Shyvana raises her hand

: Umm... Dictator-For-Life?

: Yes, Newbie?

: I have an idea... Ryze can teleport anywhere thanks to his reworked Ult. Why don't we ask HIM to teleport us to Ionia?

Darius' eyes widen in realization. He gives Shyvana a hearty slap on the back.

: NEWBIE, YOU'RE A GENIUS!

Suddenly, he takes a chill up and down his spine, and everyone else in the Club follows suit.

: Ooh... did you guys feel that?

Everyone nods.

: There's a NEW Juggernaut coming....

In Zaun, a certain six-legged Dreadnought steps out of a laboratory and onto the streets.

: WHO'S COOL NOW, SION?

To Be Continued...