The Juggernaut Club: Part 51
The Juggernaut Club members are now walking the road back to Noxus. Urgot, curious about this new group of which he is now apart, is constantly asking questions.
: So Darius, what's the clubhouse like?
: You should already know; it's Sion's monument. And call me "Dictator". Dictator-For-Life, if you want the full title.
: What do we have in there? Like, cool weapons, and trophies, and stuff like that?
: We've got a Foosball table and a computer room.
Urgot continues to spew question after question. No subject is too major or minor for him to ask about. Shyvana says the following to Illaoi as they walk along.
: I wonder what his face will be like when he gets called the Newbie.
: Who knows? He might take it as a compliment. If not that, then I think I know what his other title will be.
: What?
: The Questionnaire.
: Oh come on, can't we at least call him Newbie ONCE before he gets the other title?
: But Crazy Crowd Stopper, you have the distinct honor of holding the title of Newbie for the longest time!
: Yeah, you've set a new club record!
: A FULL YEAR OF BEING CALLED THE NEWBIE IS NOT SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!
Mordekaiser does an "Eyyy" gesture at Shyvana.
: Eyyy, Fourth-Wall breaking! We haven't done that in a long time!
: Draven knows, right!? There have been COUNTLESS opportunities too!
They walk by the four-way crossroads that leads to Bilgewater (Along with paths that lead to Piltover, back to Zaun obviously, as well as the road to Noxus). Looking down it for curiosity, they see a group of soaked-to-the-bone people coming down it: Graves, Twisted Fate, Miss Fortune and a still-drunk Gangplank being dragged along by Graves and TF.
: Whoa! What happened to you guys?
: Nautilus and Nami were having a bit of a disagreement.
: No need to mince words, they're fighting!
: Ooh, ooh! I wanna see! Can we go see, Dictator, can we please?
: No. We need to get back home, make sure Talon hasn't taken over the Clubhouse in our absence like he did that one time with his dumb knock-off of our club again. As well as the already mentioned need to get THIS Pulls Draven into view bonehead back home!
Hearing about Talon brings back memories among the older members.
: What did he call the last one again that he tried to start?
: The Assassin's Association. Or was it Affiliation? Can't remember off the top of my head.
: No, no, that was the FIRST time! The most recent attempt was the Slayer's Sorority.
: Maybe he call newest attempt Skirmisher's Syndicate!
: Yeah, everyone's tried to make knock-offs of our club, huh? I think I heard Malz trying to start one up when I left Shurima for our most recent meeting.
: Why is this the first time Draven's hearing about any of this?
: You're not alone in that, Draven! Why don't I remember any of these things? Especially if Talon was trying to take over my monument!
: Blame the writer.
: The Who?
: Morde's talking about the-
: If you're all done prattling on, we can just tell you who won the fight!
Everyone: OK.
: It was Na-
SMACK!
Graves just got hit in the back of the head with a barrel! He falls over out cold as Gangplank offers a toast.
: Drinks for everybody, in honor of the victor!
: You kidding me? Viktor wouldn't have any honor even if-
: That's not what he meant! AND... That's not booze, that's a barrel of gunpowder, you moron!
Gangplank just scoops his glass into the barrel, bringing out a glass full of gunpowder. He misses as he tries to pour it in his mouth, depositing it all over his clothes. Seeing him in this drunken state, Illaoi face-palms. She then looks at Miss Fortune and Twisted Fate.
: Alright, fess up. Who let him go back inside the taverns?
Both Miss Fortune and Twisted Fate try to stay tight-lipped on the matter.
: Come on, I'll get the information one way or another!
Both start to sweat under the pressure of her intimidating glare. Illaoi holds up her idol.
: If I don't get the truth out of you, Nagakabourous will!
Finally, Miss Fortune speaks up.
: I DID! I promised him booze if he won the breath-holding contest!
Illaoi slowly walks up to Miss Fortune and taps her idol, displeased.
: You let Gangplank, who was 6 months sober, back into the taverns. She sighs and shakes her head MF, you deserve this.
Illaoi smacks Miss Fortune upside the head with the idol! She then looks at Twisted Fate, who winces at her glare.
: Keep him on ice till I get back; we'll have to subject him to another "test" from Nagakabouros about his alcoholism.
: Y-Yes ma'am!
Twisted Fate pulls out one of his gold cards as the Juggernaut Club then resumes their walk back to Noxus.
He throws it, and just as it hits, fast as a bolt of lightning, Gangplank pulls out an orange and eats it!
: OH COME ON! You're drunk! How'd you even know I was going to do that!?
: What? I... just like citrus...
He sees the dazed Miss Fortune sprawled out on the ground.
: Hey, MF! You... look like you could use some!
He pulls another orange out of his pocket and throws it at her, and it splatters all over her head.
Twisted Fate hears a faint whining sound, something like a rocket headed their way.
: What's this?
Over the horizon, from the direction of Piltover, comes Jinx and Ezreal! Jinx sees the gunpowder strewn all over the ground.
: Oh good! Just the gunpowder I need to power my Mega Super Death Rocket!
: Your WHAT!?
Meanwhile, Swain and Vlad arrive with their stolen Z-Drive (Or what they THINK is the Z-Drive, but is instead a very convincing fake) to try and use it to repair Noxus.
: Finally! My glorious city will be restored!
He holds up the Z-Drive!
To Be Continued...
