#A Corporate Matter
Episode: Pentakill to Triple Kill to Hexakill
"No way, I Can't work with her anymore."
"Whats a matter babe, afraid you can't keep up?"
"I can't keep up? As if. No, you are bringing the whole band down. We were far better off without you."
"I don't know, I think she provides something we were missing."
"I'm with Pentakill Karthus, she is weak. Weak bad for rocking."
"Why don't you come over here and find out how weak I really am?"
"Don't taunt a Viking with a fight."
"..."
"What, you want some too? I have two arms to beat you both with!"
"Pentakill Olaf, shut it. No one wants to fight you."
"I kinda did."
"We are just here to record our second album. So let's get that done and not kill each other."
"Our first album was a masterpiece. I can't follow it up with anything less than Satan himself rising up from hell to greet our listener's ears. And she ain't even close to Satan."
"What going on in here? Me expecting you in recording studio long time ago."
"We are just having some slight creative differences, no worries."
"Is that what you call it."
"You got something to say, slash?"
"Nope."
"As I was saying. We are working it out and-"
"I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE! I specifically asked for a bowl of greens m&m's in my dressing room. Only green, nothing else. And you know what I get? EVERY COLOR M&M!"
"Jeez man, it's not that big of a deal. Don't have a cow."
"You know what, fine. I quit. Enjoy making music without me."
"You can't quit. Corporate Mundo have you under contract."
"Sue me monkey boy. Pentakill Karthus out."
"Walks out the room."
"Man, don't be ridiculous. Come back, we can work things out. Metal is more important than this."
"Just let him go. Drama queen was holding you all back. Now we can really get to making some music"
"Without the full band, it just won't work."
"Agreed."
"FINE THEN! I'm not enough for you. THEN YOU CAN'T HAVE ME!"
"Walks out door."
"I told you guys. We should just stick to one album and ride that into the sunset. But nooooo, you wanted to live forever in the hearts of metal fans. Well no this happened. So I 'm going to do the only sensible thing and drink as much as I possibly can. See you when we eventually do our reunion concert in twelve years."
"Walks out door."
"!!!"
"Walks out door."
"Oh yeah? WHERE ARE YOU GONNA GO? NOT MANY PEOPLE NEED A HEAVY METAL KEYBOARD PLAYER!"
"..."
"Walks back in."
"Me going for now. Remember, Corporate Mundo has you all under contract. So me get second album or me take every dime you has."
"Walks out door."
Meanwhile:
"Mmm, I sure do love coffee."
"Could you pass the sugar?"
"Drops mug." "Oh my Rito, you're Pentakill Karthus! I'm such a huge fan."
"Not anymore I quit the band. Then I heard a ton of yelling and doors opening and slamming. So I think I caused a chain reaction that split the band apart."
"That can't be. I love you guys. You brought heavy metal to a world that needed it. You can't break up so early in your life."
"It's probably better this way. The pressure of trying to live up to the first album was too much. I didn't know how we could improve on it and everyone wanted to try something different but fans loved it the way it was. I think we should just stay as a one album band, that way no one is disappointed."
"Snap out of it! Trying new stuff is good, maybe it won't work out, or maybe it will be even better than the original. But we die hard fans don't care. We love you guys and will stick with you, regardless of how good your next album is."
"That really means a lot. But I fear it is too late."
"Nonsense, it's never too late for music. BOSS, GET OVER HERE!"
"Soraka, what have I told you about talking to me before I've had my elix- Is that Pentakill Karthus?"
"Yes, the band has had some slight issues, but we are going to help them sort it out."
"Why do I have to be involved?"
"Because, I like seeing you help people, now come on."
Back at the Pentakill dressing room:
"Why do I hear the saddest guitar bass piano combo I have ever heard?"
"Mama, just killed a man. Put a gun against his head. Pulled my trigger."
"now he's dead."
"..."
"I've gone and thrown it all away"
"Hey losers. I changed my mind. You want to rock till the day we die or what?"
"You know I would do anything for heavy metal. Glad to have you back."
"..."
"Let's go."
Over at the Corporate Bar and Lounge:
"ANOTHER!"
"You've had two kegs already. This is getting to be a lot, even for me."
"Yo Viking, we are getting the band back together. You in or what?"
"Have I been drinking here for twelve years? Guess it doesn't matter. LET'S ROCK!"
"I have someone I need to apologize to. Where's Pentakill Kayle?"
"I sense someone hurting in the recording studio."
Over in the Corporate Recording Studio:
"So, if I do a solo album for free, would you consider not suing all the others?"
"Me no think you can replace full band."
"She won't have to. Pentakill Kayle, I'm sorry for doubting you. I'm just so worried about bringing shame to this music and its fans. But Soraka has reassured me that we won't. So what do you say, wanna rock with me?"
"If you think you can roll with me."
"So, shouldn't you guys be called Hexakill now, since there is six of you?"
"Nah, doesn't sound as metal."
"Beside, name people know more important for sales than logic. Me want much money as possible."
"Wait, we own Corporate Records? I probably should I realized that. But why?"
"Corporate Mundo has lot of extremities in lot of pies."
"Why did you think the full Pentakill band was here if not to record their second album?"
"I don't know, I've just kinda gotten used to random people showing up with their problems for no good reason."
"If you two are done rambling. I would like to start recording now."
"Go ahead."
"WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"
"YEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"
"WAHHHAYAAHHHWAHYAHWWYEAHHHHHHWAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"WOOHOO! THIS IS SO AMAZING!"