#A Corporate Matter
Episode: It's the end of the worlds 2016 as we know it.
"So I just wanted to pop in, see how everyone's doing. Anyone want some tea? Morgana? Corporate Kayle? Worldbreakers? Wait a minute, WORLDBREAKERS!"
"And who is this maggot?"
"Why, I'm Gentleman Kog'Maw. I, along with the other Gentlemen, own this company."
"THEN YOU CAN PERISH TOO!"
"Oh jeez, why would I want to do that? How about we all sit down for a round of tea and hash this thing out like Gentlemen?"
"I think not, prepare to die!"
"Wait wait wait. We have to settle this the old fashioned way."
"Oh yeah, what would that be?"
"A good old fashioned game of League of legends. You win, break the world. We win, you promise not to ever break anything."
"Why would we ever agree to anything like that when we can just destroy you now?"
"Because, the winners get these sweet Victorious Maokai medals."
"What? Those are so ugly, who would ever want o-"
"DEAL!"


"NAUTILUS!"
"What? They match my outfit."
"So it's settled then, see you on the rift."
Some time later:
"Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the worlds breaker 2016 finals. I'm your announcer, Primetime Draven. In today's match, we have Breakers Galaxy, versus Corporate T1. Somehow, both these teams made it to the finals, despite not having played a single game in the tournament and only being formed a matter of hours ago. I smell a conspiracy. Now, let us have a talk with the team captains."
"Hello, I'm Worldbreaker Nasus. And I'm here to win so I can kill all life on Runeterra."
"Ooooh, sounds like there is a lot at stake here. As you all know, you need five champions in order to play. So, who have you chosen as your fifth man, or woman?
"Well, we thought about Spirit Fire Brand, you know, to complete the look. But we decided we wanted to win, so we picked Yasuo."
"You do know he's not op anymore, right?"
"I'll believe that when I see it."
And are you at all worried that your whole team is melee?"
"Wait we are? Teemo! We are doomed. No, I'm not worried at all."
"Please try not to say the T-word on live Television. Alright, you are boring me. Over here we have Corporate Kayle, what say you?"
"Hi, I'm good. We picked Korporate Kled because he does to Yasuo what Yasuo does to our player base. We also picked Sona because she op. No, I don't have any final statements. Yes, I'm ready. Let's go."
"Wowza, you are making my job too easy. Alright then. LET THE GAMES BEGIN!"
[03:23] Corporate Kayle: Everyone just needs to buy Frozen Mallet and we win. Easy game. This should be a nice slow game, we outscale them so play safe.
"And there goes first blood, brutal!"
[03:36] Corporate Kayle: Or not, who did that?
[03:36] Korporate Kled: I did, showed that dumb boy Yasuo a piece of my mind.
[04:02] Yasuo: "So, much, damage. So, much, death. My windwall does nothing. Just when I was about to kill him, he gets half his health bar back. It's just not fair.
[04:07] [All] Korporate Kled: You think your so tough. Just you wait until I get my Infinity Edge, then we can have some real fun together.
One boring early and mid game later:
"For those of you just joining us. Welcome, you now get the watch the only good part of any match. The teamfights. As you can tell by the score, not many of them have died. Aside from Yasuo, who has given Korporate Kled 7 kills. There were a couple of close calls though, so that was pretty exciting. Despite this, Corporate T1 is losing miserably. I blame it on the fact that everyone, even Sona, bought a frozen mallet. It's like watching a bunch of bronzes out there."
[34:12] Morgana: Good job sis, we are going to lose and the world is going to end.
[35:42] [All] Corporate Kayle: GG, my team is all noobs."
[35:57] [All] Gentleman Kog'Maw: Hey, it's not my fault you guys can't decide if you like my rework or not."
[36:11] ]All] Worldbreaker Nasus: Wow, we have this Yas on our team and we are still winning. Why don't you surrender already? gg ez noobs.
[36:22] Sona: ...
[36:26] Morgana: She's right, why don't you just ban them all?
[36:34] Corporate Kayle: I didn't think about that, hmmmmm.
"Whats this, all of the Worldbreakers are just disappearing. Hang on, I'm getting word that they were permabanned because they used to just run down mid whenever someone stole their kill. I guess that's justice."
[38:09] [All] Yasuo: My whole team just left.
[38:20] [All] Corporate Kayle: Yeah I banned them all. GG Yas boi.
[38:26] [All] Yasuo: Why didn't you ban me as well?
[38:34] [All] Corporate Kayle: And make the whole League player base jump with joy? Not likely.
"And here to present the medals to our team that won in a completely fair way. Victorious Maokai!"
"Wait wait, I'm being told that he is so depressed that no one is using him and everyone hates him that he wouldn't get out of bed. Well, I guess you guys can just go grab a medal off the tray there. Anyways, we know who the real winner is. That's right, It's me. DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVEN! Because I get paid a whole lot more to talk about matches than you will ever get playing them."