Hey Guys I Need Some Behavior Advice, Please Offer Some!

evnes·4/4/2019, 1:34:56 AM·3 votes·3,857 views

Hey guys, just want your 2 cents on how to keep calm and carry your team on.

Disclaimer: I don't consider myself to have any anger issues. I consider myself a relatively mature human being who has more emotional control than many others (I consider anger IRL to be immature and unnecessary).

However, when it comes to League, I'm almost always fuming. It's my fault my mental isn't strong and I'll be the first to admit it. I don't want to keep playing games with the mentality I have, and I'm willing to admit myself at fault in possibility of improving my mentality.

I have a goal to climb ranked, it's just what I want to do. So let's call that a given. I'm also toxic... And I want to change that because I believe that's the biggest thing holding me back.

I think I have the skills to climb. I think I'm better than the people in my elo. As many people do, I get frustrated when I get a bad team here and there. When I get "bad teams" for multiple games in a row, I usually just shrug it off as an unlucky streak.

I consider it a "bad team" when I perform as good as (if not better) than the opposing person in my role (assuming that he mains that role and is the same rank as me) but still lose the game.

I've read a lot of advice from a lot of high elo players on the internet, not that they're the only people that deserved to be listened to, but because they are in the elo I want to be in, so I tend to open my ears to them more. "Suck it up, get good, just focus on your own play and improvement", they always seem to say.

You can't control other people so just get better at the game yourself. I understand the ideology, so why am I fuming so much?

I'm capable of recognizing my own mistakes and admitting that I suck sometimes. I recognize that I still have areas in the game that I can improve in, but whenever I lose games, I just feel so awful, especially if it's because of my team. Games where there's just such an enormous obvious gap of skill between a player or players on my team vs theirs just gets at my mental, even if I acknowledge that matchmaking is inherently unfair.

I've played with a Rioter in soloQ and I had asked him how to deal with "bad team mates". He told me the only thing I needed to do was "git gud".

I take breaks as many people suggest, but the next game I play, no matter how long I wait from my previous game, will still feel awful if I know I'm trying to climb back from a deficit that was created by unfortunate matchmaking.

It's just the mentality of "why am I getting held back because of other people" or "why do I have to work twice as hard for every game I lose that isn't my fault?" It gets to the point where I can start of the game 4/0 but then just run it down because I think typing to my team mates about how absolutely boosted they are will solve anything.

I just want to improve, and watching my MMR go from A+ to hardstuck game after game is increasingly detrimental. How do I fix my problems? How did high elo players do it? (I know a lot of challenger players who are VERY toxic, so I just assume even though they're toxic, they can handle their "fuming and tilt" and can still play even when berating their team mates)

How do you avoid the "fume and tilt"? Any advice is greatly appreciated!

10 Comments

Zombie Gerbil4/4/2019, 1:45:18 AM2 votes

Ah, we all have those games. Really, I just stick with my friends, regardless of their tier. I love improving with friends because of communication. We both endlessly make a lot of fuck-ups, and we communicate about it. We take each other perspectives seriously and reflects our mistakes. I've been friends with these people for nearly 10 years.

I just think League of Legends is about climbing with friends and experience the game with them and improving in every possible way. That's me though. Everyone is different when it comes to League and how they handle it.

Telephone Booth4/4/2019, 1:50:58 AM2 votes

I pretty much only play with friends too, like Zombie Gerbil. I cant imagine going solo in this tilt fest game. So I dont think I can help much, but i am a very rational, reasonable person. You stated what you consider a bad team, and I think that is part of your problem. You think getting outplayed makes you bad. But they're playing against other humans, in an imperfect matchmade game. How does someone else being better than me automatically make me bad? You've been outplayed before right? So you're bad. How you gonna be mad about other people being bad, when you yourself are bad?

Edit: also, I still get mad or tilted sometimes when playing with friends. Its not like its all laughter and smiles the entire time. But after the game, I realize the way im feeling sucks. So I try to rationalize it. I dont have to be angry. Shake it off and shrug your shoulders, go "well that sucked" and try to smirk at yourself for being upset when you dont really have to be. You're choosing to play the game. You can choose how valuable it is to you, and to me, this being a video game, the value is really low. So fuck it. You cant win em all. Stop dwelling on it and look at the bigger picture of life. You're playing a video game with fantastic technology that didnt even exist 30 years ago. You're lucky. Just try to shake it off, idk.

ChaosReyn4/4/2019, 1:56:14 AM2 votes

To put it in the best way I can: the key is to set some limits.

I'll give what I believe are the big 3, but there's a lot of complexity to this - no case of toxicity is the same as the next, that's just psychology. These aren't in any particular order or importance (all are important) but you will definitely find that once you do set limits on some things, the rest sort of irons itself out.

#Set a limit before you mute people. In short, a lot of people will tell you to just auto-mute...but that's a bit much in most cases. Some people actually do try and talk strategy instead of flame. For those that don't, there's a mute option. This limit is necessary to help you focus on playing your best game, and not letting another negative player start the domino effect.

#Limit your own input. Just as you want to limit toxicity from other players, you also want to make sure that you yourself stay out of chat as much as possible if you're having a bad game. Try to be aware of the moments that you're talking more than you're playing the game, and change those moments. Check yourself before your screen is more gray than colored, and you'll make sure you yourself are still contributing all you can. This is the hardest one, honestly. It's easy to call others out for being a nuisance...it takes a lot of integrity to catch yourself and hold yourself accountable. In particular, this point goes hand in hand with my first. I just told someone else yesterday: you can defend yourself from toxic teammates as long as you're not being toxic about doing so...but for the sake of the game, the moment they get to repetition, mute them, and don't say another word about it, or you're throwing just as hard.

#Limit your games. Finally, and perhaps the most underrated or underappreciated point, if you're on high tilt from your last game, take a break. Play some Hearthstone, take your dog for a walk, be a fatass like me and go microwave some pizza rolls...do literally anything except think about requeuing, because if you're on tilt before the next game even starts, you're already way too on edge to focus on your game, and way too ready to jump someone else if they mess up.

Kei1434/4/2019, 2:03:27 AM1 votes

The mentality I have is that "I accept bad team mates are part of climbing", and not "why do I have to work twice as hard to overcome that loss?"

There are also other things you can do to influence the map and extend your lead into other lanes. Have the map awareness and ping your team mates for anticipating dangers from ganks and roams. Them not dying could sometimes make a game without you knowing about it.

You can also try shot calling, like when enemy JG is top, you can tell your jg and mid to roam bot, make plays and get dragons.

Ultimately, it is about getting good and keeping your cool. If you are good enough and have 55%+ WR, you'll eventually climb and hit your season goals.

Whomp3r4/4/2019, 2:07:56 AM1 votes

Hey fellow summoner, Limiting amount of Games played for me personally is huge if you feel tilted then maybe its time for a small break maybe get some food or watch a youtube video. I know you mentioned this in your post but the whole focus on yourself is especially important to remind yourself out of game and in game I have a small spin on the concept and its that im not playing to rank up im playing to get better if you get better the rank will come and if you rank up its because you're getting better just try your hardest to focus on this concept its really saved me a lot of struggle, i rarely complain/flame to teammates etc. anymore because i really try my best on focusing on this concept.

doroelio4/4/2019, 2:32:35 AM1 votes

Game or not, when you aim for something you are putting your self mentally and emotionally in game.

  • The ambient influence heavily What ever you do with friends, your stress will stay low and if it come out will come out in more friendly ways What ever you do with unknown people the stress come out more easily and in bad ways
  1. Be Zen, totally not easy, 200% useful Every where, game, family, school, job

  2. You have limited ability to help others, so... do not Over use energy when you see is useless

  3. Focus on your self (you still need to be Zen), best way to use any kind of energy, anger? remold it into improvement.

  4. Vent your issue on to the IRL, NO I'M KIDDING!

  5. You'll eventually get berserk mode, try to be in a gentleman way.

Telephone Booth4/4/2019, 4:19:01 AM1 votes

Are you R107Games btw?