Boards›Player Behavior

Want to learn about toxicity? (Toxic player giving his perspective)

Charles Gnarwin·8/11/2018, 9:10:06 AM·24 votes·11,328 views

Sometimes friends wonder why I'm so toxic. Here's my perspective in case anyone was curious about the mind of some toxic players.

I think it's because of my investment in this game. I sit there watching replays and LCS, and make sure to learn from them. I try to eliminate simple mistakes, and when someone points out my mistake I apologize and actively try to fix it mid game.

HOWEVER, when people refuse to acknowledge or fix their mistakes, I tend to be angry.

Typically I first try to suggest a change they could make such as ** "hey u should ward tri"

"pls watch out for my mias"

"careful jg is botside dont get ganked"**

and upon their inevitable ignorance, I start to soft flame. I don't expect them to agree with all my suggestions and I'm not a control freak, but people should be reminded of simple things like warding and watching your map.

I'm not a bad person, I'm extremely positive and love learning, but sometimes people's refusal to adapt and improve their game play gets to me.

I'm curious as to what other players think.

Do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

What do you think the source of toxicity and flame is?

Please give your insights I'd love to start some discussions!

76 Comments

KVbqbFsC8e8/11/2018, 9:26:11 AM13 votes

I simply started playing online games in a different era. Back when nobody even used the word "toxic" and trash talking was just part of online gaming. People accepted it much more, and were not nearly as sensitive as they are these days. It isn't easy to suddenly change to conform to Riots standards.

MOLTinaTOR8/11/2018, 9:21:37 AM9 votes

Do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

Yes, small stuff like "we can look for a gank when this and that".

What do you think the source of toxicity and flame is?

People with anger issues or just trolls.

As for you, if a teammate doesn't want to cooperate, ignore them and focus on the game, the flame is not worth your account. Flaming them would only distract you from the game itself.

AeroWaffle8/11/2018, 9:14:52 AM9 votes

Do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

Sometimes.

If they don't follow my suggestion I know that insulting them is hardly going to help.

What do you think the source of toxicity and flame is?

The player flaming.

ModUlanopo8/11/2018, 9:12:05 AM7 votes

Do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

Generally, no. I don't feel it's worth the effort most times.

disregardable8/11/2018, 9:29:45 AM5 votes

Do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

I do, it's pretty necessary for bot lane, but only for really specific things.

"can you ward baron?", not "ward more"

"we can win if you dive them", not "be more aggressive"

What do you think the source of toxicity and flame is?

the game is designed to be less fun from behind, and it's designed to be unlikely to come back from behind.

that's shitty game design, and you're not even allowed to leave when you stop having fun. which makes it stop feeling like a game and start feeling like a trap.

Arcane Blue Boi8/11/2018, 12:59:17 PM3 votes

do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

I used to but its useless. Everybody is so proud of themselves they wont bother to process ''enemy jung botside'' and continue pushing without river warded And then they proceed to blame mid for not roaming or jungle for not ganking or top for not tping everybody but themselves same as when i ss i spamping ss mid, say ''carefull bot #mid champion# ss'' and they continue pushing, and then blame me for not following the roam, while they could've simply backed off and suddently the enemy mid just lost 1/4th of the turret and 1-2 waves of cs

Geauxx8/11/2018, 10:32:34 AM3 votes

At least you have a better outlook than me.

The last time I actually cared to try and improve or anything was my first season back in season 5. I was optimistic and such.

Now? Well I just play the game to play the game and walk into every match thinking (excuse the language, but it's the literal phrasing I use)"these stupid mother fuckers are useless and i don't expect shit."

I'm at the point of not talking, but I ain't going to listen to a word anyone else says either.

  • the perspective of another toxic player.
EvilDustMan8/11/2018, 1:55:30 PM2 votes

Alright. Since you are receptive. Two things to think about.

First, you are a rando. They don't know you, they'll never see you again. They have no reason to listen to you. This is not a judgment, it's human nature.

Second, flaming will likely make them do the opposite of what you ask and may even make them play worse.

Throw out the suggestion once. Use please and thank you. If they don't ward tri and someone ganks from tri, consider just warding it yourself.

And remember that you could be wrong. You aren't playing in their chair, you don't know what's going on.

AmazingBeaver8/11/2018, 9:32:28 AM2 votes

I'm not a skilled or a good player but here are my two cents . In lol you are dealing with 9 more tilted players in your game , trying to correct them is only going to spark arguments and the blame game begins . Generally people don't want to think they are not good at something and tend to shift the blame away from themselves and / or gang up on someone else who is having a bad game . Best thing you can do is , just focus on your thing , arguing in the chat only digs your grave deeper .

Best Vi Earth8/11/2018, 11:46:23 AM2 votes

couldnt have said it better myself.

Vlada Cut8/11/2018, 12:45:42 PM2 votes

I don't care why you're toxic. An excuse won't cut it either. I just want you to be penalized for ruining other people's experience.

Sexy Fish Nami8/11/2018, 6:14:29 PM2 votes

First of all, I would like to commend you for your courage to say this in the boards. Many will see your title and just downvote you or some will even insult you or say stuff that are not constructive and that can be irritating.

The problem, from what I see and felt, is that the origin of a flamer comes from expectations.

A player with alot of expectations will get mad easily because his expectation will not meet the reality of the situation he is in, thus, creating anger towards the players who did not meet his minimal requirements. On the other hand of the spectrum, a tilt-proof player is usually someone who has low expectations. They dont get as mad as the toxic player because almost everything will go beyond his expectations, thus creating a good surprise almost always to this individual.

This applies also in real life and if you had a hard time understanding my point, just think of somewhere in your life where you had expectations and another even where you had low expectations. Tell me, which one angered you the most and which one was more bearable.

hrooza dota 8/11/2018, 9:20:20 PM2 votes

a good way to not flame anyone is to focus on your self more during the game sometimes i have trolls or super bad players in my team but i dont bother because i tend more often then not to focus on my self more then anything else. (or i tend to cry about my 300 pings) [slayer-jinx-wink]

i also like to give tips to allies if he dont listen then whatever screaming at him wont do shit.

HalcyonDweller8/14/2018, 4:30:37 PM1 votes

I think you've struck gold on finding a major source of toxicity. But we can go even deeper. Toxicity comes from expectations being violated. That's the root of it. Be it from expecting teammates to act in a certain way, or expecting a play or the laning phase to go a certain way. This manifests in a lot of ways.

When you put the effort in to accept your mistakes and learn from them, you're being a great person. You would also expect others to do the same, because it is the reasonable thing to do. But when people violate that expectation you have of them, it upsets you because you feel like they should have handled it that way and instead they acted like a brat.

Sometimes people play consciously like you do, but many people often play on auto-pilot. They don't want to think too hard or have to work hard for it, they just want the flashy plays and the win without having to put in the work for it. They expect their play to go well, they expect to win laning phase, they expect to get fed and snowball. When those things don't happen, that (entirely unreasonable) expectation gets violated and it upsets them.

If you're looking for ways to reduce your own toxicity, a great place to start is with how you set your expectations. If you set your expectations about a game based only on things you can control (like getting a certain amount of farm or keeping certain places warded or using chat only for encouragement) then you won't have your expectations violated as often and you won't be upset as easily. It's hard to accept, but we can't control our teammates, if they're going to play like jerks then there really isn't anything we can do about it. The most we can do is offer a kind word of encouragement here and there and hope that they focus, cooperate, and don't tilt.

LightningShado8/12/2018, 12:14:07 AM1 votes

Yeah I get it. Sometimes I tell people what they're doing wrong but I used to do it a lot more. Instead of flaming them, I try to have a conversation with the person, telling them exactly what they're doing wrong and why they shouldn't do it. This isn't very effective, which is why I don't do it very often anymore. Now I usually just keep track of myself and what I'm doing wrong and I expect my teammates to do the same for themselves.

VelvetCrotch8/12/2018, 2:38:46 AM1 votes

I am a very polite and warm heartily person in RL. Even I lose a 1 game here and there. But if I continuously lose I really get angry very quick I even don't care anymore if the guy who played bad had his first game today or got bad connection (which is the last type of guy I flame) or is just very kind.

Many ppl argue that toxic players complain much but play bad. I agree and disagree with that. Toxic players are normally good - very good players who lost too much and play bad just cause they are tilted.

If the MM would give toxic players guys who actually play on the same level, they wouldn't tilt, maybe even help and ward etc. But nooooo it just gives you certain type of players over and over again.

And nearly every toxic player starts friendly then soft flaming and at last bring very toxic

Samel Seifer8/12/2018, 2:46:35 PM1 votes

Do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

Not directly, I don't know how to explain this (mostly cause I don't speak english) but it's easier to push people into doing things if you make them think it's their own idea. I don't like to manipulate others, but damn, I'm pretty good at doing so, I know it looks like a bad-deeds oriented skill, but it depends on how you make use of it, just like... almost everything.

About toxicity, I don't care about where it generates, I report flamers regardless of their reasons, it's almost impossible to offend me so one may wonder why I do so, well, firstly I like to follow rules, if I'm told not to flame then I won't even if "X" keeps throwing himself into extremely disadvantageous situations and complains about us not following him, I expect everyone else to respect the same rules thus the report for those who don't, second I'm empathyc, if I think about how my female cousin (wich is soft-hearted) would feel if someone told her she's garbage...wait, I'm unable to imagine it happening without the impolite guy exploding mid-sentence.

LadyNinjaFox8/12/2018, 6:58:04 PM1 votes

[{quoted}](name=Charles Gnarwin,realm=NA,application-id=ZGEFLEUQ,discussion-id=j9EQz8UE,comment-id=,timestamp=2018-08-11T09:10:06.383+0000)

Sometimes friends wonder why I'm so toxic. Here's my perspective in case anyone was curious about the mind of some toxic players.

I think it's because of my investment in this game. I sit there watching replays and LCS, and make sure to learn from them. I try to eliminate simple mistakes, and when someone points out my mistake I apologize and actively try to fix it mid game.

HOWEVER, when people refuse to acknowledge or fix their mistakes, I tend to be angry.

Typically I first try to suggest a change they could make such as ** "hey u should ward tri"

"pls watch out for my mias"

"careful jg is botside dont get ganked"**

and upon their inevitable ignorance, I start to soft flame. I don't expect them to agree with all my suggestions and I'm not a control freak, but people should be reminded of simple things like warding and watching your map.

I'm not a bad person, I'm extremely positive and love learning, but sometimes people's refusal to adapt and improve their game play gets to me.

I'm curious as to what other players think.

Do you bother giving suggestions to teammates?

What do you think the source of toxicity and flame is?

Please give your insights I'd love to start some discussions!

Some of us have just become so toxic that we should just leave league for good. I am leaving for good I have asked for my account to be perma banned. best thing for ourselves and the community.

Citavista8/11/2018, 2:40:48 PM1 votes

I usually only flame in response to a teammate giving me a suggestion. Mostly because they come off as condescending. It's not real flame tho just a "stfu" would probably be a "idc kys" if kys didn't trigger the riot toxicity alarms.

The root behind most toxicity is probably the way people passive aggressively talk shit then say "reported" when you just straight up talk shit back.

It's worse when you're doing bad tho because then you just gotta attack the person personally, can't call them trash if I'm doing worse lol.

C9 Dinozor8/14/2018, 4:09:31 PM1 votes

yea i just got permabanned haha, on this account, do i even get to post? hahahha its hard giving good feedback/advice without being critical most players get really offended when you talk about their playstyle w/e im banned