An honest plea for leniency in toxicity.

So, I just received a permanent ban. And I'm going to be honest, despite efforts to clean up my act, I probably deserve it, and it probably can't be fixed anyway, but I'm going to make a plea, and just a general confession, because I'm at the end of my ropes in a few ways.

So, a bit of background, I've played League since around season 1, but I moved to Dota and only recently came back as a way to get my girlfriend into it. In my actual life, I've been trying to get things going, and working with an ever worsening depression. And that's where a lot of the issues come from. For those that don't know, anger is a common side effect of aggression. It isn't an excuse; I can control it, but I fail to. I'm lately attempting to get medicated because...well, it's gotten bad, not to say the least. When I came back to League, I was actually very proud of how I did, not raging at all and getting many honors. But as it went on, and as other things added stress, I failed. I raged too often. I don't intentionally feed, quit, or go AFK, but I rage a lot.

I only ask for a bit of leniency because I am trying to get help and get this addressed. IT hasn't just effected my gameplay, but my life in many ways, and I'm very disappointed in myself in a lot of ways. But League helps, a lot, as does being able to play with my girlfriend. It's one of the few good things left in my life right now, and I don't know if I have it in me to start it over again.

I don't know what I'm really asking for, other than one last chance that I probably don't deserve while I get things in order, and just wanting to apologize for being a stain on the community. I try and be better, and I failed. I guess a lot of people do :/