Banned

So I was banned. I honestly think I deserved it. I've been extremely toxic this past few days. I've got a lot of things in my life that i'm struggling with. I've got a drug addiction, A new job my first in 2 years since my ex girlfriend terminated our baby. I'm working every day of the week and i'm sleeping very very little. I've been a member of the game since I was 17 years old maybe a litlte younger. I'm 25 now and my life hasn't really been going very well since my best friend killed himself. He wasn't just my best friend. I was in love with him. It broke my heart. My dad shortly theirafter went to jail for something that at least around our town sounded very horrific, and in all honesty was, but was misconstrued. Media and law enforcement basically put so much malice and misinformation into the community that my dad and I became relative shut in's. The only thing I've done, the only thing I was once good at, though not so much anymore.. was League of Legends. I've been playing since Season Wukong was released on 2011-07-26 that? is around when I began playing. and League became my life. I tried at League. I honestly never tried after Caleb died. I never tried again, except for at league. It kept my life going, kept me from killing myself repeatedly. Last night I said some very callous and terrible things. I was haunted this morning but I still got furious earlier tonight.. and I lashed out as I tend to do. I dont intend to do it, I just have so much rage.. so much pent up fear and anger.. hurt. I spent time in jail dreaming of league. It was my first stint in a place like that. Id never done anything to bad in my life.. but I allegedly traveled in another state with some things I shouldn't have had. I met two people in a diferent state thousands of miles from home, where I had gone to prove my love to the only other person who will probably be remebered as the love of my life, though the true one, no one will ever know.. I beg you. Don't take away what has been my sole comfort. I am willing to play as many games chat restricted and in low que as it takes whether it a 200 or a thousand. Reform me, I beg you but please dont take away the one thing thats given my sad pathetic life any meaning. I know This sounds like just another sob story, and i"m sure you get them all the time. But i'm literally begging you. before time wasted on lol stopped working correctly id logged at least 328 days (I think) Into league between all of my accounts. Its probably far more then that now. I recently got 80k blue essence and five legendary skisn for the amount of runes I had because of the amount of time Ive spent giving my life and spirit to this game. I am connected to it. And thats not just talking about the thousands of dollars i've spent on it. I know I cant buy my way out of this, but I'm begging you, pleading with you prostrating myself infront of the computer.. PLEASE let me be forgiven.