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How to be friends

SurrealJC·2/28/2020, 10:19:05 AM·1 votes·3,131 views

I wonder... how terrible a person am I for complaining about misplays in league? I must be a real jerk right. I'm really glad that i got to witness 2 IRL friends playing together and they had an obvious kill and my passive friend retreated and my aggressive friend said "why didn't you help me" And he was like "i dunno.. i was just gonna go back" and like.. the whole bit "we had a kill you shoulda helped me" .. totally legit statement. They had the kill and i watched it happen too... and i was thinkin like "why's this guy so passive? he doesn't want to help his teammates or.. get kills or was he just not even looking at the screen?" And then P was like "I don't like A, he's kinda a jerk" and i was like "well... hes a strict guy, hes german he has high standards like me." Thers a reason we were friends right. They didn't know each other IRL so there was no attachment or connection of any type. He's just another text name on the internet who's easy to forget and block out.

TLDR: I try my best to never complain to friends I want to keep as friends because I know its kinda annoying and can be harmful... but here's the thing.... when I DO say to my passive friend "dude why r u backing off? get some autos in man. Aw damn.. we needed more dmg in that fight to win" guess what he does... He ignores it because he wants to stay friends and not let some stupid game ruin a good thing. Enjoy your gaming, remember every person you react to you are either choosing to make a friend or an enemy. Be a good friend... don't support banning in video games. Don't utilize the report function. Don't support cancel culture. Be friends. Even when someone is frustrated. It's only human.

6 Comments

Nightsky Pirate2/28/2020, 10:44:38 AM3 votes

Different people handle the situation differently; find out what they prefer from you and the game. When I go into a new multiplayer game with a friend, I'm like LAY IT ON ME, CRITICIZE EVERYTHING I CAN UNDERSTAND. Then I ask questions, so many that I have to be sure my friend is willing to answer them. Which is more important, Crit or Attack Speed? What skill as a player should I focus on first? What's the meta? Can I make X work? What are the threats to my playstyle? How do I counter that? What am I so strong against, that if I see it, I should maybe think about it being bait? Etc. I obsess over the mechanics and seek optimization from the first steps.

I tell my little cousin a secret from Zelda, one carrot on a stick at a time. Show him a little trick if he hits a wall. Give hints, but never the answer. Someday he'll be a pokemon master and Smash-bro, if that's still a thing by then.

I've learned that no matter what, don't 1-up your friends. Don't brag. If it looks like I'm about to overpower my buddies, I'll deliberately de-optimize so we're on the same level, or carry while totally goofing off. And if they're on my level... I suggest Dark Souls. (evil cackle) And if they're on another level? Train me sempai.

I believe internet friends and real friends belong in very separate circles, however. You have a different mask, and so do they. If you're that close, have at it... but I wouldn't recommend it. Don't worry about who dislikes you... and don't be fake to the people that do.

GatekeeperTDS2/28/2020, 1:46:56 PM2 votes

I wonder... how terrible a person am I for complaining about misplays in league? I must be a real jerk right.

No, you're not a jerk. You just need to know the difference between being a boss and being a leader, being constructive or being destructive.

Talking about, bringing up, and criticizing people for what already happened is destructive. You're in the middle of the game, not in some kind of post-game huddle where everyone can talk about what went wrong free of pressure. During the game you want to be constructive and talk about what needs to happen next, and when you say things, include yourself in it so that people don't feel attacked. "Hey let's get dragon next time." "We might want to push the tower." Things like that.

Posui Gart2/28/2020, 11:27:40 AM1 votes

Be a good friend... don't support banning in video games. Don't utilize the report function. Don't support cancel culture. Be friends. Even when someone is frustrated. It's only human.

I'm not here to be a friend. I'm here to have fun. Flame wars in chat are not fun at all, and so is afk/leaving/inting, and I will do what I can to get people who ruin my fun punished. And if it is my irl friend that does those things? Well, if he does that, it would probably be better for him to play something else, I don't think he has much fun either in this case. Of course I am not talking about playing bad. Everyone makes mistakes sometimes, and sometimes its the stupidiest mistakes that are remembered later and laughed at