Coming back after a year of perm ban.

I've come back after a year of perm ban, I haven't played on alt account either, after my ban I simply purchased OW and I've began to play it with a casual mind opting for fun over competitive. I had forgot about league until a close friend told me he could still see my account on Lolking which meant it wasn't deleted thus with effort maybe I could retrive my rights to play the game.

I'd say I was a really toxic player, was the kind of player that would go head to head against an other toxic player in my own team and really destroy team morale forcing player to DC and the game wasn't fun for me nor anyone in my games. I would be negative when someone would pick something bad, was toxic when someone wasn't properly filling his role and generally would be relentless at destroying team spirit.

I was a player that needed to be banned. I was a player that deserved to be banned.

The issue with all of it is that I still had games where I was a good team mate. I had games where people would add me and we would play without issue. I had good time also and it's worth noting that It wasn't all bad.

The game is , was and still is one of the game I watch closely, I watch it on streams but it's hurting. I know I've been wrong to be so rude.

League of legends isn't a place for toxicity and it's not a place to deal with IRL issue either. Ruining the game for everyone isn't fun for anyone.

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Today I'm in a different place, in a different mood and I've grown. I haven't been toxic in other games. Not once did I get into an argument. Saying that I've change would not be fair since I never was a vile individual I was simply blind to the consequence of my words. Blind to the fact that what I was saying could hurt someone. Its easy to insult someone when you don't see the consequence of your actions.

I want to have my Pardon. To come back into league and not be that toxic team mate. I want to come back to a game I've played for over 4000 hours since season 1 and that I've enjoyed the most out of all other game I've played. It took a long time for this toxicity to build up in the few early season my chat behavior wasn't so arrogant and aggressive. I was calm, collected and friendly. Happy to take part in such a great community that was growing so fast.

I'd say my toxic behavior was coming from IRL issue but also from goal that I could not reach. I was Silver and I simply wanted to reach gold to have rewards at the end of season but It seem to me that I was caught in an endless loop of climbing to Silver 1 and dropping back to Silver 5. I had win streaks of 10 and then lost streaks of 15 it was hard on me. I was trying to find a coherent answer to why I was climbing and dropping and It appeared to me that my team mates were the issue. Which is why It is proven that I've been toxic when someone was doing poorly or when picks weren't in accordance to set meta.

I know now from a distance that it was all irrelevant what I wanted most was to enjoy a good game of LoL.

Now I've been banned for a Year (a bit more) and I've done a ticket but I'm also exposing myself to the community to see how you guys would react. The reform system was proven inefficient but I find it unjust that I can't have this chance after so long to prove that I know how to play in community without standing out as a loose cannon.

Thank you for reading, feel free to comment anything.

Walk Perm Banned Top Lane