You're Not a Toxic Person.
I hope many users who play this game read this post and at least take one or two things from it, it can change your League of Legends experience tenfold.
This thread is not to sympathize with trolls or people who are vindictive and set out from the jump to ruin someone's playing experience. This thread is for anyone who has ever felt frustration, anger, even sadness, after seeing 'DEFEAT' pop up after a long game of League of Legends.
LOSING SUCKS.
I know it sucks because we've all lost before, including myself, more times than I can count. Sometimes when I lose it's out of my control. Bot lane was giving double kills, or our jungler wouldn't gank. I'm winning my lane, but hey, why isn't mid lane warding and then complaining about getting camped? Now the enemy assassin is 5/1, bot lane's outer tower in down 12 minutes into the game, and it's not looking good.
Other times, it's my mistake. I picked the wrong champion, and now my lane is harder than ever. I'm trying my best, I'm changing my tactics, I'm even improving, all I need is a little help, yet my team is giving me no aid; they won't even give me the benefit of the doubt. I want to win! I'm trying my best make it work! If only we could just help each other and collaborate ideas, but no one seems to want to communicate. No one wants to work as a team. The frustration begins to build and soon enough, my fingers are flying across my keyboard and I'm saying mean-spirited things that I would never say to someone's face.
I don't know if you're like me but I'm not a happy camper when I'm losing or when I've lost. My heart is racing, I might get a headache, it's just not a good feeling at all. I'm a competitive person. I don't care what you say. I don't like to lose. No one does. So when I put my time, energy and effort into something, the ambition that I have expands far beyond reaching an objective and I become emotionally invested in whatever I'm competing for. I'm not going to be satisfied unless I win. And if I don't win, yes, I'm going to be upset; in fact, I might even be angry. Especially coming close to victory, and not quite achieving it.
But feeling angry and feeling frustrated after losing is okay. It's normal, and you're not the only person who feels that way.
I used to be furious and lash out, letting my anger boil over and reach unwarranted levels. Because it wasn't "just a game" to me, I don't care if there's always another one. If I spent 40 minutes doing my best, I want to win. That's my time and my effort... wasted.
That's why I became a toxic player, and it translated into other teamwork based video games. In fact, I was a sore loser in real life as well.
But those feelings of anger and frustration don't have to come as often as they do when and after losing.
There are ways to cope with losing, and they've worked with both my friends and I, letting us enjoy our experience playing League of Legends, and other team-based video games that much more.
Here it is.
HOW TO DEAL WITH LOSING AND/OR BAD GAME EXPERIENCES
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The step that's most important for me, personally, is Preparing to Play. This means being in a good head space. Being in a bad mood, and then thinking "let me go squash some noobs in League of Legends to take out my anger" is not a good idea. If you're in a bad mood, and losing makes you upset, if the tables turn and you end up losing, you're only going to feel worse. In fact, even if you do win, chances are, you might be an undignified winner and make it an even worse gaming experience for the enemy team. Remember, if you're winning, that means the enemy team is losing, don't make it harder for them to take the L than it already is. You know what it feels like to lose. Being a good or neutral mood beforehand makes keeping your emotions under control easier. Slipping into toxic habits such as cursing at your teammates and intentional feeding becomes far easier when you want spite someone. Don't be that person. You're better than that.
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If Communication is Important to You, Play with Friends. Don't you hate it when you're trying to suggest strategies to try and win a team fight or take the dragon without the enemy team knowing, and you're met with silence? I know how you feel. Dealing with this can be easy, just get someone familiar on your team! Playing with friends from school on TeamSpeak or that one guy who's always online on your friends list establishes a ground of familiarity and comfort. You can talk to each other, and this can make playing so much easier, because if even two of your are collaborating and communicating with each other, the rest of your team probably won't want to be left out of the club. Next thing you know, the whole team is pinging each other, you're taking mid tower and dragon at the same time, and Thresh's lantern's are serving you life (literally).
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Don't Blame or Get Angry with Your Teammates, they feel bad enough already. Or maybe they don't. Maybe they don't care about winning, and a competitive spirit such as yourself can't understand this, and it's frustrating. Dealing this can be hard, but it's important to remind yourself that they're also losing beside you, and a lot of times, they're trying.
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Accept That You Will Never Be Prepared Enough. Ever get ten minutes into the game and realize that you're playing more successfully than the rest of your team and you think "What the hell kind of team am I in?" Match-making is random. Players' skill levels range, and your teammates are not always using the champion they're best at. Unless you're in a 5 player ranked or e-sports team that has practiced with each other over and over again, you literally only have a little more than a minute to coordinate with your teammates, and then after that it's game time. It's not going to be easy, and you're never going to be prepared enough. Once you've accepted that, then the concept of losing never seems too far away, and dealing with defeat becomes that much easier.
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Continuously Point Out the Positive Through-out the Match. By the time your game is coming to a close and the enemy team is circling your nexus, you know that you've all tried your best. It feels good when someone acknowledges your highlights. Like when you got a solo double-kill as the ADC and got away with a sliver of health and your whole team congratulated you, doesn't that feel good? Anything from "thanks for warding" to "you've got great cs!" can help you recognize that your team is trying, and by the time losing comes around, you can say "At least we tried," because you've already acknowledged their effort.
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Loss is feedback. Knowing that you didn't win can be a punch in the face, but accepting that you lost is a far better way of looking at things. Always be keen to reflective of your own gameplay, you can never know enough in a game in which a lot of times the winner is dictated by luck. Focus on what went right, and then reflect on what went wrong to improves your odds of winning the next time.
And finally, Have Fun. Listen to much, have some snacks with you, play with friends, make jokes At the end of the day, it is a game, which means you get to dictate how much fun you have.
Play well and good luck out there.
Every mistake is a lesson.