Yeah... i went through that phase long ago. Used to think i will get good, but over the years I just stopped caring about getting good. Its like, no matter how good you get, there will always be times where it just doesnt matter in game. Sometimes matches are decided without any influence from you and its just a bit deflating. Thats kind of why I exclusively played starcraft and starcraft2 1v1s. I just hate having to rely on teams lol. So i only really play this game cuz its fun with a couple friends on weekends. Occasionally ill log on for a couple solo games, but I find myself spacing out as i try to force myself to hit that play button. Ill go on youtube or pack a bowl or go have a cig. When you have to force yourself to play another game, you know youre just not that into it anymore.
I tried one tricking anivia, and im up to near 400k on her i think, but that gets old too even though shes really fun. Theres just something about crushing a laner and going like 11-0 in a game, to then go against a kass the next game and just get wrecked like the guy you just wrecked last game. Its just like, did i even improve at all? Did it matter that I wrecked a Fizz, when the next Fizz destroys me? Half the time I win lane, I just think, am I improving, or was that guy just bad? Lol.
Also, I played a ton of master yi on an alt account, and even though he is fun as hell, theres something demotivating about starting over every game. You gotta go through all that jungling again and be weak and slow until you get those items all over again game after game. You get used to being a murderer and then its like okay next game; start over. And whos to say their jungler wont completely fuck you this time. Its like each individual game doesnt matter. You can wreck one game, and then the next everything is out of your power due to the circumstantial and team nature of the game and you just lose for playing just as well as you did the game before.
So yeah, I feel you. I feel you.