Boards›Player Behavior

Turns out, I am toxic

SonicAF·10/21/2018, 1:59:36 AM·4 votes·2,326 views

Recently I started playing with multiple friends, because my push to diamond was unsuccessful (capped at P2 for a while and haf a loss-streak to P5. It is fine. I swap picks too often and those picks are not high risk high reward.

We have quite a bunch of people and none of us is perfect. I talk too much as play off-meta. My gf is bronze 99 and doesn't want to improve. Our morgana/zyra main lets my gf play support and feeds other lanes with frightening stability, while joking that it's all jungler's fault, especially when I successfully carry with a farming jungler. Our assassin player is not very social, but he is the only one who has friends. And the fifth one is usually hus friend or a random player.

Three days ago the owner of discord, my old friend The Guy(as I am going to refer him), returned to league after like...5-6 months of inactivity. We've played a couple of games in our common fasion and one game snowballed into complete shitshow. He got caught in one really bad fight and got killed instead if taking a kill so I, in my common fasion, made a sarcastic remark about the lost, but honorable battle.

He instantly left Discord. Our group got confused and I typed in chat that he should come back and it's boring without him. He did and his first words were "Wanna mock me some more?". I was quite shocked, but decided to apologize, adding that I never intended to insult him and he responded "Yeah, I know I failed, but you don't have to rub it in like that".

That was quickly forgotten and me, him and assassin successfully played Twisted Treeline placements to get our Orianna chromas. It was pure joy and it seemed that nothing could go wrong. Until today.

The game started with our Zyra player feeding toplane twice by minute 4, our assassin getting owned on botlane with the girl as his support and The Guy(camille) losing a fight with lee sin on the crab. He successfully escaped, but saw me coming and jumped back into lee sin, so my opponent (ezreal mid) nuked him down, and even enemy botlane joined the party. -That engage was...unexpected. - I said in discord and we proceeded playing.

A minute later our toplane dies again and says "hey, camille, look, vlad has 10% health" and I responded(which was minute 5 tops) "Yeah, I know, right? All jungler's fault, doesn't gank at all" and right after my words camille gets picked by lee sin on her blue at says "because someone doesn't watch his fucking midlaner" and quits duscord.

I asked The Guy to come back and stop trolling me. He responded through chat that he will leave the game if something like that happens again and did not come back into voice com.

He silently left our party and, for some reason, kicked toplaner from discord channel, so we had to reinvite him. Had to proceed playing as four, with me constantly asking my mates if they feel pressured to leave discord when playing with me.

So now I am on forums, where people get chat restricted for less than I said to The Guy. He got sincerely offended by me twice and I feel like I would get punished if that drama was fully played out in league chat. It seems like I am toxic and make someone"s experience miserable.

It has been hours since that game and everyone I talked to find his behaviour weird and irrational, but Riot's chat policy seems to be designed with specifically people like him in mind.

But is it worth it? I'd lose a lot of what I am if I wasn't talking really much, - other people woukd have less fun playing witn ne if not for ny openness snd humor.

With that vague punishment system, aren't we missing something...human in our games?

27 Comments

Kei14310/21/2018, 2:10:33 AM6 votes

People take sarcasm and criticism differently.

Some can ignore it, some will scream reported for toxic!!!!1!111

You don't know what happened to That Guy's life. Maybe something really unpleasant happened irl and he's trying to use LoL to escape, thus not wanting to hear a speck of negativity.

Sarcasm can be taken pretty negatively irl even when they can hear tones of voice. Personally, I try to avoid all forms of sarcasm as it can take a wrong turn verrrrrrryyyy quickly.

EvilDustMan10/21/2018, 11:14:06 AM2 votes

It is annoying to have someone make a comment everytime you make a mistake. It's not irrational.

Voldymort10/21/2018, 5:24:25 PM1 votes

Turns out, I am toxic

reads story

https://media.giphy.com/media/VLFbES1wezNhm/giphy.gif

DeracadaVenom10/21/2018, 10:25:03 PM1 votes

What’s with the name of ur article :P

Umbral Regent10/22/2018, 10:09:23 AM1 votes

He got caught in one really bad fight and got killed instead if taking a kill so I, in my common fasion(sic), made a sarcastic remark about the lost, but honorable battle.

He instantly left Discord. Our group got confused and I typed in chat that he should come back and it's boring without him. He did and his first words were "Wanna mock me some more?". I was quite shocked, but decided to apologize, adding that I never intended to insult him and he responded "Yeah, I know I failed, but you don't have to rub it in like that".

...

A minute later our toplane dies again and says "hey, camille, look, vlad has 10% health" and I responded(which was minute 5 tops) "Yeah, I know, right? All jungler's fault, doesn't gank at all" and right after my words camille gets picked by lee sin on her blue at says "because someone doesn't watch his fucking midlaner" and quits duscord.

It's at this point that my thoughts somewhat echo Voldymort's. What kind of a friend acts like such a dick to their friend, and then does it again after said friend expresses extreme contempt with that behavior and goes so far as to leave Discord to separate themselves from that BS? Not a great one, I'll tell you that much.

Unsurprisingly, when someone gets mistreated by a friend, they have a tendency to distance themselves from said friend that's mistreating them. Who would have guessed?

But, no no no, that's not your narrative here is it? Your takeaway from this is that your friend is in the wrong, that somehow he's acting abnormally because he's developed a sudden aversion to dickish behavior. To quote:

But this is not only the case of misunderstanding sarcasm. This is a case of severe overreacting to comments, completely ignoring their severity, even if they were not sarcasm.

Statistically, he is an anomaly. Not my comments. Everyone I play with knows that the only performance I care about is my own, including him. But he gets too stressed when he is underperforming, I guess.

Here's a story for you. My mother plays Wizard101, and she has a couple friends on there who play Rated PVP - and one of them is particularly win-hungry and has been known to be kind of an ass when things don't go strictly his way. Which is, IMO, kind of a bad thing to be in a game where the win condition is RNG, but I digress.

So one match she and him are fighting a duo, and he starts ranting and raving about her not pulling all the right cards (again; ignoring that Wizard101 is pretty much 100% RNG) and starts yelling at her over Discord. What does she do? Leave the call. Lets him yell all to hisself, because she doesn't want to deal with it.

Is my mom overreacting to her friend wanting to win so bad? She knows that he gets excitable when things don't go to plan, but does that make it any more necessary for her to deal with his shit when he does?

The answer to both questions here is "no". And here's the best part; she's been perfectly open about his attitude being an issue, and he has, as far as I've heard, actively worked to try and iron it out. 'Cause the two of them like playing Wizard101 together, and of course they both want to remain friends, so the one who was putting tension on that friendship made the effort to alleviate it.

The Guy is well within the right to bail out of the Discord Channel, especially after you pull that kind of behavior twice, already knowing after the first that he's not about to put up with that shit. The issue isn't That Guy overreacting - it's you being a jerk to him in the first place.

If it's so boring without him, you wouldn't be a jerk to him, simple as that.

With that vague punishment system, aren't we missing something...human in our games?

What, like a modicum of respect? Probably.

mlm olo mlm10/21/2018, 11:22:35 AM1 votes

My gf is bronze 99 and doesn't want to improve. Our morgana/zyra main lets my gf play support and feeds other lanes with frightening stability, while joking that it's all jungler's fault, especially when I successfully carry with a farming jungler.

Multiply that by millions of games. Welcome to league of legends community.

Game play is a HUGE deal to some people. Game play is the sole reason they are there. (Notice how people have no hesitation in leaving your discord?)

Their goals directly conflict with the quoted players. 2/5 of your team not even trying is not going to result in quality game play. It's going to result in the other team getting fed and steam rolling the rest of your team.

Personally, I get annoyed when people suck. Worst thing I will say is they suck. When it carries over into willful ignorance, that's when they lose any respect from me.

BlinkZZ18210/21/2018, 2:59:07 AM1 votes

I think the main problem is your gf and the Zyra player. Throw them into the top lane, tell them to play these Sion Swain Yorick DrMundo only (item 3110 item 3001 item 3065 item 3165 item 3020 use the tank build on swain instead of the standard build). They all have a nice, smooth and safe laning phase and your gf cant feed her laner if she plays safe. The best thing is even if she is behind, she will still be useful because of the tankiness and CC. You want to put the less skilled players in your premade into the position of tanks, instead of a enchanter/mage support (or something worse like a Zyra top?). You can even fill Top, Mid, Support with 3 tanks if you have 3 low skilled members in your team. 2 carries with damage from two of these positions: mid, bot, jungle, is usually enough.

That is the game part. For discord, you want to make people hear you laugh when you are being sarcastic, signaling them it is a joke if they can't find it out themselves. With voice chat it should be easy for people to identify jokes from insults so I don't see that as a problem.