Recently, I Started a Match on Full Tilt

Suffice to say, I was angry. I was angry at my opponents for humiliating me. I was angry at my past allies for failing to win. I was angry at myself for performing poorly. I was angry at Riot for tolerating trolls and inters and afk's just so that everyone can play the game.

I did not do well. At least....not at first.

I fell behind in farm, I died a few times early. I lost all 3 of my lane turrets to the enemy team.

Thankfully, I had chat and pings muted. So, the only person I could talk to at the time was myself. And, I engaged myself in an inner dialogue. It went a little something like this.

Question: Why are you so angry? Answer: Because I've been losing so many matches lately. Question: Do you think remaining angry will help you win this one? Answer: Probably not. Question: Then why remain angry if it isn't going to help you at all? Answer: Because I'm human. I can't just turn my emotions off like a switch. Question: Have you even tried? Answer: I suppose I can try to calm down a little.

From then on, I began to repeat to myself in my head. "I am cold, I am cold, I am cold" in order to achieve a chill attitude and approach what remained of the match with cold calculation and tactical logic.

While I was not able to take on enemies on my own given how far behind I fell, I was able to apply what I had to assist my team in achieving victory. I became acutely aware of the map, correctly guessed at where enemies were, and coordinated with my team to secure victory.

Because I didn't have chat or pings on, I was blind and deaf to the possible and likely negativity of my allies. Instead, the only words I could hear were my own thoughts "I am cold" as I determinedly help secure victory.

And it worked.

We won.