How do i better myself as a part of this community?

I suck as a Person on These boards.

I honestly am really bad at communicating whenever i create a thread that is no meme. and i stand to it, but i don't wanna Keep having that around with me. Whenever it is a Review, a comment, or a suggestion. I just somehow say something that seems to envoke the deepest negativity in people. Doesn't Need to be an Insult, neither literally not in meaning. I have also seen myself become increasingly easy to provoke and i daresay admit that i had some very toxic moments, even if i did not directly Insult someone, it has been very clear to me that i have been giving some pretty offensive comments on both the boards and in league of legends ingame, and i really don't like where i am growing into.

And i got no idea how to better myself at that, honestly. that is why i am opening myself about it to the community.

I have lately been making a lot of, let's just say negative attention, and it has been giving me some upsetting thoughts to follow with it. And while it is true i had some good and reasonable and even funny conversations, most lately have just been back-and-forth Insults, him insulting my intelligence, me answering on the same Level, reasonlessly flaming each others on vulgar Levels and so on.

But i do not blame it on them, i blame it on myself. I can't tell what i do wrong, but i do something wrong, when i for example make a comment on possible balance suggestions or make a suggestion myself, no matter how well the idea was well-credited, i find myself drowning in negative replies and votes.

Sure, most people will now tell me to do some of the protocol stuff like "no negativity, don't appear tilted, no swearing, be respectful" and ingame there would be more or less the same old "mute and report" but even when i do all of that, i lack something else, this one last Little part that would help me appear with more Appeal to the community and playerbase, that would help me be more open and communicative and appreciated aswell as let me return those points to others.

BUT there is also that Problem of me possibly forcing myself into These correct behaviours that would feel forced and even fake, i want to learn how to be a better Person and not really shape myself into one. I do have some good moments, where i can be myself with 0 traces of negativity, but the longer i Play this game, the more i feel it dissapearing.

I used to be toxic way back when i joined league and had my 10 game long chat restriction, and i tried to learn from it and for a time it worked, but now that i am being more and more active with league, it is dropping more and more into a lower place again.

so to make it short: how do i become a better Person in the league of legends boards and community without becoming a fake? What can i do to be more positively appealing? how can i be a better Person?

admitting that i am growing toxic wasn't easy for me, and that i am already bad at socializing makes it no better, but i want to change for the better, and i trust the community with this issue and that i can at least just a Little bit get better.