My opinion on toxicity and human behavior.

Hello all, hope your morning has been well. So i started playing league of legends and got to level 10 account. I am fairly new to the game but have some experience with Mobas.

I started doing aram and i saw some toxcity. I wanted to share my insight with toxcity and maybe people can agree, disagree, or offer their insight.

The first thing i want to talk about - is my own experience. So i was raised catholic, and with the belt, and i was bullied on as a kid in middle and highschool. Over time as i experienced much suffering in my life (being bullied, break up with my ex gf, 4 of my close family died to cancer) i started aging and growing more patient, loving, and more social. I do read self development books (i won't talk about religion here) and i have dealt with many people who were in the same situation as me.

First off, i cry a lot. I feel crying is a great way to go into your emotional physical and mental pain, and come out more stronger and more conscious (more sensitive, alert, experienced, and more patient).

2nd off i know that the way our families raise us and our culture and our environment - they play a big role on how our personality self will develop. Cultural family, and social conditioning combined with a little luck make us who we are.

3rd off i also want to share what goes on in my head. I am schizophrenic. I hear voices (thoughts many different thoughts) and natures in my head. I can say, i am free from my mind's automatic reactions and responses as well as not day dreaming and wondering through life cluelessly. When someone in aram says something toxic, i can feel the warm hot dark energy come over my head, and i want to complain, attack, hate, be aggressive, and be destructive. I have an awareness that - i am aware of my triggers as emotional negative feelings that pull me into identification with them. The toxic chat tends to pull a dark side out of me and that dark side tries to "live / become" me. When i was younger (20 years old to about 24) i had a lot of anger and insanity in me. I am 27 right now, and i am very patient, honorable, loving, and social. To get this way, i often would train / practice being calm. Most of the time i would fail and be on auto pilot being very destructive and toxic, but after years of practice, i have finally gotten enough "will power" to sustain peace and patience with most people's toxcity.

Now i want to talk about other people.

So other players. They may have not been raised to respect themselves and respect other human beings. People might also not have been taught how to save or manage money, or treat a female properly, as well they probably drink, do drugs, play games, and are addicted to pleasure of life to remove the uneasiness in their mind and heart. People have trouble dealing with their emotions. They are extremely weak minded. Most people cannot control themselves when triggered and become angry sociopaths that want to inflict pain or destroy others. I know this because i was once like that.

It's not just league of legends players. You can look at many 3rd world countries, and people are so conditioned and crazy, they cause so much pain and problems for themselves, and for all of the world.

I think humanity is becoming mentally ill, or at least, this new generation of gamers are very unstable and crazy. They may have been raised un properly or not taught by their parents how to be civil and respectful. Or maybe just badluck and fate turned them into dark human beings as they aged.

I am not a parent yet, but i think children and animals (kittens, babies, flowers, nature) have the power to make most humans kind and compassionate.

The really dangerous humans are those that are unable to feel basic love for their fellow men and women, boys and girls, dogs and cats. Those people are a danger to all life on the planet.

I don't know how to help deal with toxcity on league of legends, and also deal with negativity, and dark personalities in america. BUt what ever is happening, is slowly twisting many minds.

There are some good people on theses boards (this specific category of player moderation) but i think still that, basic love and social skills should be taught in school.

Any ways that is the end of my rant. I wanted to express my self because i feel i can help others see things in a clear light. Thank you.