Secret Battlecast Meeting Board
: Yes, With Kog’maw and Skarner coming hot off the conveyor belt, we will have the means necessary to outperform the Piltoverian MECHA series.
: It has been a long and strenuous journey, but we have finally succeeded.
: The dawn of our superior machine race is upon us!
: Why are we still running my rig in alpha? I believe I currently have sufficient enough experience to be releas-
Cho’gath’s shoulder plates begin to vibrate as a sonic boom expels from them
: SILENCE! You dare not question our creator.
: It is okay, I do not mind criticism, so long as it is as constructive as the glorious revolution. Skarner, your full model is to be released with a replay system. The technology just isn’t there yet.
Skarners servos start visibly smoking and his ocular receptors start flickering (AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is supposed to be like his eyes are twitching in an "I can't even" sort of fashion)
: In that case, it may be appropriate to address a concern.
: What? Out with it!
: Taking into account our initial funds, and subtracting the production costs per unit, plotted on a linear scale -
Kog’maw shows signs of overheating, as it’s CPU cannot process the terminology (AUTHOR'S NOTE: This means Kog'maw is confused)
: BIG WORDS ALERT! BIG WORDS ALERT!
: Put simply, we do not have sufficient funds to mass produce the Battlecast units.
: WHAT?! Surely the price for each Battlecast unit cannot be that expensive.
: The cost of each Battlecast unit averages to 1582 RP. That is approximately 13 Dollars.
: Dollars? RP?! What are these currency units? Can’t we just last hit a few minion waves?
: Perhaps. You did equip my system with sufficient methods for large quantities of minion carnage. I suppose I will take the liberty of -
: Nobody picks us.
: Excuse me?
: Nobody picks us. None of us even have a 7% pick rate. We have to be picked before we can farm any minions.
: THIS IS INEXCUSABLE! Certainly one of us gets played frequently enough to farm. Someone picked often enough with excellent wave clear that we can use.
The room goes silent as each of the Battlecast members is restraining themselves from speaking, except for Skarner, who is still silenced.
: Viktor, you know what you have to do.
Viktor recedes his pose
: ...No, they aren’t one of us. They don’t count.
: I have scouted him. He fits the criteria.
Viktor sighs in defeat
: Very well, I will contact him.
Viktor pulls out his HTC phone and calls his only blocked number
: I know we have had our disagreements in the past. I know I created you before I had my grand schemes. However, I’m willing to put our differences aside, in the name of progression and glory.
There is a gasp on the other end of the call
: SENPAI NOTICED ME!
