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How to deal with people insulting me?

s0kBNWI77C·8/24/2014, 5:00:20 PM·1 votes·2,699 views

Ever since I started climbing the elo ladder, I was carefully watching how the community in every new league is different compared to the previous one. I started the climb in Bronze 5 where I ended up after completing my placements the day I hit lvl 30. The community in Bronze was extremely toxic but not in a way that could seriously hurt somebody. These were mostly players below the age of 15 and it was actually quite funny to watch it sometimes.

In Silver, players was chatting much less, focusing mostly on their flawless gameplay. Sometimes there was a rager but it also was nothing dangerous.

Gold 5-2 was pretty much the same, except that there were a lot of players who were always focusing on others' gameplay and giving them - in they opinion - constructive criticism. Funny as hell.

And now I'm Gold 1, tilting between 0 and 90 LP. I also have a second account in Platinum and exactly the same thing happens there. In pretty much every game, after you make a mistake, you're getting directly insulted and humiliated by at least one player from your, and sometimes even enemy team. I'm an ADC main and it happens to everyone that you're sometimes out of position. It's bad, but it's not the end of the world. However, each and every time it happens I know what I can expect to see in chat.

"vayne you suck uninstall and kill urself"

"omg that vayne"

"rito why am I matched with these noobs in my team?"

"/all lol vayne you suck xD"

I never, ever, raged before in League. I usually muted toxic people as soon as they started insulting anyone in chat. Sometimes I even did "/mute all" at the very start of the game if my team started to argue in champion select. And what I enjoyed the most is that I knew that people who deserved it were added to my ignore list forever. Now it changed, as /mute works for one game only. Because of that, even when I mute somebody, I usually unmute them after a few minutes because I feel like it doesn't matter if they're muted, since I will see they rage anyway in the post-game screen. I also don't want to feel like they're trashtalking me behind my back.

Recently, my attitude changed dramatically. When someone starts insulting me I usually get really angry and reply with a equally bad language to them. I even received a warning today that I was recently reported for negative attitude. I know I deserve it though.

Because of all that, I don't feel like I want t play League anymore. I still love watching streams and LCS but as soon as I launch the client, I don't really want to click that red "Play" button. Also my performance in games got much worse. I used to be able to carry most of the games because I was playing to win. Now I usually give up after I get insulted for the first time and don't care about the result of the game - just want it to finish as soon as possible so I don't have to play with these people anymore.

How should I deal with it? What can I do not to care about people insulting me and focus on actually winning the game again?

7 Comments

Wheatloaf8/24/2014, 5:08:14 PM6 votes

I usually respond "love you too bb <3" when anyone starts flaming me. Often times, they either give up or just start to sound really pointless and awkward :)

EVG Mike8/24/2014, 7:16:30 PM1 votes

The best way to handle it that I have found is to say "harassing me/him doesn't help us win, instead help me/him play better with advice"

Any variation of that whether directed toward you or an ally is more likely to get you to victory than an argument. If they persist the mute button can be your friend. Keep in mind that everyone is trying to win but that player has probably just on tilt from previous games. Despite using this tactic in 90% of my games I recently got a 14 day ban because I slipped and called someone a "retard" when I was frustrated- which is considered extreme hate language. Goodluck ;) Don't have a moment of weakness like myself. I have also noticed that toxicity runs in strings- if you get 2 toxic games in a row STOP PLAYING for at least an hour or two in ranked.

MAZZ1M08/25/2014, 2:26:39 AM1 votes

Something witty that isn't insulting usually works.

I understand where you're coming from though. Toxicity almost kills ranked. The fact I don't know what the Victorious skin is this season doesn't help my morale any. It's just bad; but my recommendation is to duo queue. You focus more on teamwork than the toxic players, ragers, and bad players than you would otherwise, especially of the two of you together can carry.

I don't even get on ranked solo anymore. It's not worth the hassle. I don't even know what I'm fighting for -literally. The gold borders are nice, but it's not worth listening to filth that comes out in the lobby and in-game. Duo makes it alright. Get on Skype or Cursevoice or something and feel your troubles wash away -sort of. You can't fix feeders or afk's, but you can ignore toxicity.

I also find toxic players change their tune when your team jumps on them. We had a player a few days ago raging at us because he thought he was good, hell, I didn't even have a kill, but I was taking objectives and supporting the team best I could. The enemy team was telling him how bad he was. Normally I don't like put-downs, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy them putting him in his place. As bad as I was doing, I was still valued, he wasn't. Teamwork and communication tends to form bonds even for the 40 min. you're in-game. If anything, people appreciate it more if you're good at making decisions and helping the team and staying coordinated etc. Sometimes, even ragers stop raging if I can get them on my page or someone else gets us on theirs. They're just stressed out. The game is draining in ranked because you're so dependent on teammates doing well.

I have a friend in silver who does not belong in silver. He should be upper gold or even low plat. I've played diamond and plat players so I know what I'm talking about. We gripe with each other constantly about our garbage luck. Even when we do well, our team throws. We decided to duo queue and are now climbing ranked. Now that we carry, we win more often, but that doesn't change the fact that 4-9 players decide how your game is going to go when obviously, you want to win as much as possible in ranked -especially considering how toxic the community is. It's more a chore than it is fun in ranked at times.

Also, going back to the put-down thing, it helps if other teammates appreciate you. It seems weird to side against a single player, but on occasion, it does work if he's just that hard-headed. Ragers typically don't intentionally feed so while he may not be on the same page as you and your teammates, you can coordinate with teammates you are working well with and trust that he/she will do his/her best given the circumstances -they want to win. That's why they rage.

As for enemy team insults, :P Ignore or turn that into fuel for victory. If you're in the mood, comeback with something. Trash-talk isn't necessarily bad as long as you don't cross into "kill yourself" territory. If you've ever been to an arcade (I know, relics, right?) people trash-talked at every competitive game ever. It was a part of the old gaming community which hasn't necessarily died, it's just splintered. I sense you understand that though, so I won't go into that.