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I feel terrible right now

Wolfeur·6/26/2017, 8:47:31 PM·1 votes·316 views

Hi, just wanting to say something because I'm feeling really bad right now.

I don't really know where to start, I've been in a bad shape for several months now and it doesn't look like I'm getting any better. I've been psychologically tortured by my girlfriend for a year before breaking up, which led to her getting all of my friends against me and them leaving me alone. And when I thought I was going to get better after miraculously finding new friends, my new girlfriend broke up too, mostly because I was too needy for affection. The thing is, my life doesn't look bad at all: I'm 22, I have my own big apartment, a steady job, plenty of money, and a caring family. But despite that, I feel utterly alone and I'm craving for physical and sentimental intimacy. My heart is currently tearing apart between two girls that are not even in my reach, and I can't follow the rhythm of life of my friends, that are all still students and currently in summer break while I work all day long. I don't know a lot of people and don't really have the time or the motivation and energy to meet new people, which leaves me without any prospect of finding a nice girl. When I lost my former friends, I also lost my confident, so I get no one to talk to, except one of the girls I like, when she's available and not the topic. I can't really cope with what's happening, and I lose my energy and my motivation for work, which impacts my performances, and sometimes it even destroys my will to play. In these cases, I just wander on the internet, waiting for a miracle to come. I've been seeing a shrink for a while now, but I don't feel like it has a tangible effect on me, and I think I'm starting to make her mad. I just don't know what to do… I don't know how to meet people, I'm shy and introverted, I don't like bars or sports nor basically going out. Everyone is telling me to try and make an effort, and to change my life style. But deep down, I don't want to. I just want to be who I am and just find someone who will like me for that, and I always fear that in the miracle case in which I find her, she gets freaked out by my needy behaviour. I feel hopeless, and hopelessness, and I don't see a way out.

Thank you for reading, I had no other place to say it.

4 Comments

Moooose26/26/2017, 8:50:48 PM1 votes

go to a psychologist or counselor or something, don't post it on the boards. Go get actual help.

LostFr0st6/26/2017, 8:58:37 PM1 votes

I don't know a lot of people and don't really have the time or the motivation and energy to meet new people, which leaves me without any prospect of finding a nice girl.

Depending on if you have a pet or not (or if you have an interest/hobby that works too) you should try social events that most cities organize for people.
Hobbies are a great way to break the ice.

In these cases, I just wander on the internet, waiting for a miracle to come.

Life doesn't work that way unfortunately^^"

I've been seeing a shrink for a while now, but I don't feel like it has a tangible effect on me, and I think I'm starting to make her mad. I just don't know what to do… I don't know how to meet people, I'm shy and introverted, I don't like bars or sports nor basically going out.

Have you tried doing a tiny bit of volunteer work every week? For some people helping others helps them help themselves in the long run, since they see it could be much worse. It would also help you adjust to new random people in a more controlled and organized space.