Emotionally drained..

These past few days have been hard, I have constant thoughts running through my head about what I want to do with my life. It seems like I'm just throwing ideas in side of my head and seeing what sticks. Yet they all fall flat onto the ground, as if that wasn't hard enough, my brother is in the hospital because he was off his medicine for his schizophrenia. Despite the happy facade I have to put on at work, it feels slow and drudging. I've lost count of the tears I've cried today. I can't even enjoy League because of people who are so overly negative it honestly makes me want to just leave the game, the only game I played today was absolutely terrible.

I also can't even remember the last time I saw or spoke to my father, he won't even come to family holidays...

I don't even know why I'm typing this, the forums aren't my diary. I guess I come here so often it just feels like a place to write stuff down.

And maybe if I write some of it down, it'll help...