How I addicted to LOL

I don't know why i started writing this now. First of all I have to say sorry for the grammar mistakes because English isn't my first language.

I do not remember the correct date but it was year 2012. I saw a Girl and suddenly I was fall in love with her. And I told her about that through my friend but she didn't gave a proper answer.Later I told her that I fall in love with her by myself.Even for that she didn't say yes or no. I didst try to bother her because that year we both have to face Advanced Level exam which is really important to us. Few week before the exam I remind her about my early proposal and asked her to think about that after the exam. time flew quickly and after the exam I had an opportunity to get closer to her by Facebook. At the time we both knew we had to do A/Ls again for better results. Finally I decided to ask her again. Her answer was " If you can wait another year I will think". I felt sad and happy. I was sad because she didn't give me a proper answer and I was happy because she gave me a hope. And she decide to deactivate her facebook account to focus on studies which is a common decision at the time. I didn't try to meet her because I didn't want to disturb her studies. One year flew like a wind but one thing didn't changed. How I felt about her.Trust me every day I pray for her love.Everyday I think about her. I started loving her more than myself.I dream about her. At the time LOL was introduced by my friend.But I wasn't that much interested. I played twice a week or trice a week.Finally she activated her facebook account and I was over the moon. We started chatting like old days.But after few weeks I realized there is a some different in her.There is a something I'm missing. She started to ignore me. Then I decide to ask her again for the last time. Her answer was " I'm sorry.I love someone else.You will find a better girl than me". I felt broken. Am I deserved to treated like that. I tried stay normal. But I felt something wrong with my heart. I told what happened to me to my friend and he asked me to play LOL with him. I played LOL until 3 a.m that day with him and his cousin. I probably think that saved my life.But I wasn't the same person anymore.Sleep doesn't come to me tear does.I felt anger more than ever. But now I understand one thing. She never felt the same way I did. I'm not blaming her for that.It has been 4 years now.Whatever happened part of me still love her and the other part love LOL. So I never wanted to stop play LOL.