How are things with you?
Everyone I know is dead... how are things with you?
My wife's soul has been kidnapped by a psychopathic, sadistic demon warden who is probably a rapist.
I was forced to kill all my friends and family because I was framed for the murder of the elder who was also close to me. Wait a sec... this isn't alcoholics anonymous, is it?
I watched my entire village be slaughtered and right when I rose to take my revenge, nobody opposed me.
Same here except with a demon pit that burned off my pants and replaced them.
Everyone I know wants to kill me. And I am trying to force myself to like moon pies, but it is difficult.
My ship and arm got blown up by a card shark and a guy with a shotgun chewing nicotine gum.
I was sentenced to death by my king and literally stabbed in the back as I watched my home turn into an undead wasteland, and I slowly lose myself every day in this writhing mass of souls. I can't even make decisions anymore, restaurants have become hell.
Everyone I know is a lie... shut it, Skaarl.
My people are probably already died because I dicked around here instead of finding the moonstone.
The weight of millions watching me forces me to keep silent and emotionless to give them hope in a strong champion.
I lost my brother and mentally replaced him with an eagle.
I think I was once somebody's brother but was considered dead.
I try time and again to help people but they consider me a madman and try to kill me. Also my third arm wants an allowance from me now.
I don't even know if I'm in this timeline. Wait, what is that blue box flying around here...?
Hot Topic near my house got closed down the other day and my stupid mom kept bothering me with dumb sentimental stuff.
Ok, we'll convene next week. Same time.
Guys, what about m-
HAVE A NICE WEEK, EVERYONE!
Everyone walks out
...I wish I could say I had a home to go to...
Fin
I keep getting resurrected, only to have my spells change...
I keep finding lewd fan art of me...
My joke hasn't made sense for years...
My backstory keeps changing...
everything i stood for, got torn from me and now i have no home and i have PTSD
im forced to live a life where no one can understand me and i had to give my last human part to my dying father
my best friend was murdered but i cant turn back time far enough to save him and one girl i loved has gone crazy 
and the other 
is gay for 
maybe ill get 
-Pai doesn't notice me
it's okay mumu, i know what it's like to be invisible
you're one to talk little hamster man
Mundo like voices!!!
i think i'll let you suffer for a lil while
that tasted purple...
heh kek
is that a rocket in your pocket? or are ya just happy to see me ;)
oh my, yes hello there! what a bunch of happy lil...
No one takes me seriously, they say I'm just a Tryndamere clone even though I was born before he was!
No one respects me when I'm strong and when I'm weak everyone is happy.
People try to keep me as a slave. Or milk me.
I've literally died more times than I can count. Its hurts dammit.
Whenever I'm the first to die someone makes a perverted joke.
I'm married to a lunatic and the people I try to help want to murder me.
I was enslaved by a mountain who made me create such an ugly arrangement of lights... ugh, tacky.
My best childhood friend stabbed me in the back, destroyed my entire civilization including my wife and children, AFTER I gave him what he wanted from me.
Bwaaaamn! (Everyone treats me like a lazy stoner...)
I can find love for everyone else, but there is no love for a golem T.T
People keep trying to blow out my head and make a wish.
Actually I'm good. Could use a glass of milk though.
My brother tricked me into giving up my humanity and becoming an unfeeling killing machine.
I used to have legs and be drop dead gorgeous. Used to...
There's not enough food here.
HELP, I'M HAVING FLASHBACKS!
People keep making me go off to war when all I want to do is shoot hoops.
I can't watch myself sleep Q.Q
I have spider legs growing out of my back and have become a slave to a gigantic arachnid.
I killed my father. Not sad about it, just felt like I should chip in my fair share.
People keep sticking hooks with worms on them in my mouth.
They're about to rip my mind out of my body and force it into a new one! Please, someone help!
I want to go and elope with Katarina, but then my nation would disown me and probably try to kill me.
Where am I? Who are you? No, stop it... STOP IT! REAGDSGHERGRWSD!! breaking glass
I ran outta beer... hic
They took away my cigar.
Some jackass plugged my spine into a horses neck, and now I'm a damned undead centaur.
People keep telling me to raise... well, something call "dongers", but I'm not entire certain what that is. I have several hypotheses...
The tentacles never leave me alone. EVER.
I died and some crazy lady brought me back. Oh, also, everyone keep trying to hit me with nerf toys. Its annoying.
No one knows my lore, but they all know I worked a phone sex line to pay my way through college.
LeBlanc keeps posing as me. Copycat...
Who wants a piece of th... uh... you know I just... I just don't want to man. I'm just not feeling it anymore. And I'm sick of this stupid mask that makes me look like I have too many damned eyes!
Viktor stole my shit.
I wasn't the forth person on this list...... loads gun
No one even knows who I am, but they keep calling me a bitch.
Every time I sing I bore the audience to death. Everyone's a critic...
I really want to jump that goodie-two-shoes' bones, but then everyone I know would try to kill me.
My sister hates me.
People keep throwing red and white balls at me.
Some lion man is trying to murder me, but I'm just looking for a snack.
Turns out there quite a few people around here into bestiality.
I'M SO HUNGRY!
Honestly, I feel where Eve is coming from. This outfit is sooo not battle ready.
I lost my eyesight when I set myself on fire. Honestly, was kind of expecting to die.
People keep acting like Diana and I hook up in secret. I fucking hate Diana!
I have the WORST frostbite.
I got a copyright notice for trying to quote Dwayne Johnson.
My pets all die within seconds of me getting them.
I'm a tree, I'm not supposed to even be able to talk. PUT ME BACK DAMMIT!
Honestly, I'm just do bored of everything to do with life. Comes with living so damn long.
For some reason, everyone thinks I'm a slut. I'm probably one of the only female champions who is actually a virgin, you judgemental tards!
I can't actually play guitar :(
My sister hates me.
My brother wants to kill me, has for centuries now, and I'm afraid that one day I'll have to put him down.
They left me. No one leaves me anymore...
I'm not actually that old, stop making cougar and cub jokes!
I wish I had legs...
The yeti wont let me go home to my parents, please send help!
I feel like I have to fight for honor... but I don't know why.
I just wanted to be a baker, but they gave me this bronze age tech and told me to wage war against people who have sniper rifles... assholes.
I can't find the hero, and this hammer is so damned heavy! Well, it's supposed to be. Guess I'm stronger than I look, huh?
Raaawrr! "I have sand in my vagina!"
My brother locked me in a tomb for centuries with an insane mage and he still acts like HE'S the victim in all this!
That was my good eye...
Tristana doesn't want to go out with me...
I'm getting saddle sore from being forced to ride this pig ALL THE TIME!
Everyone keeps calling my Heath Ledger or Mark Hamill.
I'm a half-breed who everyone looks at as a freak. I'm not even sure how my parents coupling is even possible! Seems like it would be really uncomfortable in addition to disgusting.
My bones are exposed through the missing parts of my skin.
Where the hell is my foot?!
My great-great-great... uh... however amny greats' grandfather keeps pressuring me to join the family business, but I'm really just not that into politics.
I miss my kind V.V
...
This bird... is... controlling my... mind. Please, oh god... hel- LET'S JUST MORPH AND EAT THEM!
All of this show of power is just my way of compensating for the loneliness I feel due to having no friends.
I'm not a frog, and I'm not clogged. I'm not a toad, and you can't even unload those! And I don't ribbit! Now get in my mouth!
No one ever taught me to tweeze my eyebrows...
Have you got any idea how annoying it is to have millions of people forcing you to say how "outrageous" gems are over and over again for years? I'm still a little upset about it.
Ever since she moved in with me, all Senna has done is nag... uh... I miss being single.
Sometimes I think people don't appreciate how hard I work, you know? Like, its tough being King! I've gotta bash heads, crush skulls, make ice, and no one ever offers to help.
I'd tell you 'bout mah troubles, but ran outta room before I co
A feral mutt keeps chasing me whenever I go outside.
My master and best friend since childhood promised me freedom from slavery but went "SIKE"
I may actually be the only person in this entire universe that's doing fine, saved my life, got new abilities and a purpose... Thanks for asking.
