(Mulan's "Be a Man" Parody) Be a Main!
Much of this was invented in real time in a match. Probably the byproduct of a writer's diseased mind gone insane from supporting and sleep deprivation.
One enemy Tristana really was weirded the hell out by my singing.
Let's get down to business... To defeat... bot lane! "You went Vel'koz support?! Lost R you... insane!?" Well, now, listen up, you little shit, 'cause you can bet before we're through... Mister, I... will turn you... into gooooooooo.
Tristy dodged me three times... but I'll have... her head... One small lapse in movement, and you're FUCK...IN' DEAD! ["You are creepy as shit, Vel'koz!"] You can't shut me up, Young Tristana. Lest you dare to mute me, too, Tristana... what are you... GONNA DOOOOOOOO?!
Yay, I just got a double kill! Say goodbye to your Master Yi! Support getting kills with skills is not a sin. My skillshot's got 'em scared to death, While I carry out my duty, Holy shit is that fed TF ULTING IN!? [SHUT DOWN!]
Be a main! Back, back, I see there's a Horse in river! (Be a main!) Janna blocked me with her ult, Monsoon! (Be a main!) Here comes the ADC's raging ire, And Poppy is gonna ult me to THE MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!
Time is racing toward us... Till the minions spawn! ["Get Redemption, Vel"] Stuff it, Ezreal main. I am not... your pawn! [SUPPORT FIRST BLOOD!] "What'd you do that for, You fucking whore!? That does it, gg, I'm done. Now have fun... fighting a... 2v1!"
Be a main! "/all This support Vel'koz is fucking silver! (Be a main!) He steals kills like a great buffoon! (Be a main!) I hope he dies in a raging fire, And that my whole team reports him to THE MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!"
