totally serious champion suggestion

THIS IS VERY SERIOUS SUGGESTION!

Bob, Janitor Of The Rift

Lore and stuff

"league got tired of dirty rift, hired janitor to be summoned in to clean and train new summoners, idiot summoners summon Bob and not champions on occasion"

Bob can't be played on the howling abyss or twisted treeline, those are for his janitor brothers Jim and Bubba

playstyle

disregard champions, objectives and the whole game, make rift clean

abilities

Passive: UNCLEAN!!!

Bob gains a flat 3000 movement speed bonus to recently slain champions to clean up the bloody mess, while cleaning Bob is untargetable because the champions know he's just doing his job, while scrubbing Bob removes all the filth, this includes minions, walls, teemo, twitch streamers and bronze players

Q: Scrub-Scrubber

Bob scrubs the place diligently, dealing 500/750/1000/1250/1500 true damage to whatever filth is in front of him

W: Dirty Mop

Whenever Bob scrubs up a filthy corpse his mop gets dirty with blood, void slime, various poisons, charred flesh, teemo and dead minions, causing his basic attacks to deal 100/200/300/400/500 magic damage per second for 5 seconds, when Bob visits his supply closet (near either fountain) he cleans his mop

E: Caution, Wet Floor

Visiting his supply closet restocks Bob with 4/8/12/16/20 "wet floor signs" placing 4 signs designates a wet floor for 5 minutes, champions running over a wet floor slip and fall every 2 seconds of walking, falling and breaking their legs so Bob has to call Hailey, Nurse Of The Rift to come get those idiots who didn't read the signs to the hospital

ultimate ability: I JUST CLEANED HERE YOU IDIOTS

Whenever a champion dies near Bob while he's cleaning or near a spot he cleaned recently Bob gets enough of those obnoxious champions and teleports them all to the fountain of the enemy team to put them in timeout, in addition to their respawn timer Bob also fences the area so he can clean in peace for 3 minutes