Every Summoner's Rift Game Ever Part 2

Okay so let's see. We have a Yasuo mid, Braum bot, Vayne bot, and a Warwick jungle. As a regular delicious Malphite I plan on becoming tanky early game and then proceed to buy some fuck-you-up items later on in the game. Got a ton of armor runes and tanky masteries applied to me, and I just bought a Doran's Shield. Yasuo bought a Doran's Blade, Vayne a Doran's Blade, Braum bought the relic, and Warwick bought a Doran's Ring. Wait…what? Why would you… Okay, don't flip. Maybe it's one of those players who are really good with builds outside of the meta. Hell, I've seen an AP Xin Zhao kick major ass before, so I can't automatically assume that he'll do horrible. Let's just wait and see. I have to go up against Rek'Sai at top lane, huh? No biggie. With my hella armor her Q ability can't do shiiiiieeeeeet. I'm pounding this bitch like a drunk stepfather! In the end, I bring her down to low health while I still have around 75% of mine.

And she burrowed. Aaaand she's at full health again. Wait…what?

Okay, maybe she had like three potions going while she burrowed, because I know rito would never do something so evil like give a champion that much fucking health regen on an ability that has a hellish low cooldown. Hell, does it even have a cooldown?! Whatever. I'll just get Warwick to help me out. She doesn't have any health pots on her, so this is perfect. Warwick is in position in brush while Rek is trying to bully my lane. Ummm…why is Warwick six levels behind us? Hasn't he been jungling all this time? Obviously not because the red and blue buffs are still there. I signal him to be careful but he runs in anyway thinking that his Q will heal him from all of the damage in the fucking--he's dead. Might as well take the chance I have. I ult in and start beating the shit out of her. I bring her down to 1 hp before she flashes away and burrows. No prob, she's most likely gonna recall. There's no way burrow grants that much health regen--

Aaaaaand she's at full health again. Wait…what? Omfg. She doesn't even have Spirit Visage.

Mid game comes around. Warwick is now 0 - 15 and Rek practically one hits at this point. Yasuo is doing alright in his lane against an Orianna. Her range is just too much bro, I swear. I commend Yasuo for going 4 - 2 against her. Braum and Vayne are doing their thing, pushing bot and placing wards where they are needed most. Eventually a teamfight breaks out at dragon. Vayne is the first one to die because the enemy team is smart enough to know that you're supposed to focus the ADC down first. Yasuo has high damage but he doesn't earn a single kill, and instead of winning what was supposed to be a simple snag, we end up getting our asses kicked. I check to see who has the most kills on enemy team and then I spot it. No fucking critical strike chance items. Good job, Yasuo.

Around late game, Vayne actually gets fed! Good job Braum, cookies for him! She carries us unfortunately as if she had the weight of the world on her shoulders and we start dominating teamfights. Both sides are pushed to their Nexuses and everyone is at mid lane. This teamfight will prove who wins the game and who loses it! So I drop a ward in a brush and--and Warwick just ulted Rek'Sai…aaaaand he's dead. Sigh. Whatever! We didn't need him anyway. Braum initiates the 4v5 teamfight well with his ult and Yasuo follows through like a tide in the wave, dealing explosive damage to everyone. After convincing him to add Infinity Edge and Statikk Shiv to his build, his passive allows him to automatically take out two enemy champions before dying. R.I.P Yasuo. You will always be remembered. All up to Braum and I to protect our savior. Vayne gets through two other champions with the help of my ult and Braum's passive. Rek'Sai tries to runaway but we catch up with her and start beating the living fuck out of her. We're winning! Then she fights us back. Vayne's dead. Braum's dead. I'm dead. All because of her Q. No problem, Vayne and I slapped Ignite on her and she only has 100 health. It'll be an easy ace for both teams once she's--

Aaaaand she burrowed. Aaaaaaaaaaaaand she's at full health again.

Your team has agreed to surrender with 5 votes for and 0 against!

GG.