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The Official Rules of League of Legends

Laughing Fish·3/4/2019, 12:17:00 AM·135 votes·18,623 views
  1. Do not chase Singed.
  2. Teemo is pure evil. No exceptions. 2.1 Unless you main Teemo, than Teemo is a saint. 2.2 Teemo mains lie.
  3. Report the jungler. No exceptions. 3.1 Unless you are the jungler, than report your ADC.
  4. Trinity Force deals tons of damage.
  5. Unless you have definite proof otherwise, Garen is in that bush.
  6. Any team that surrenders when you don't want them to are cowards. Report them.
  7. Any team that refuses to surrender when you want to are trolls. Report them.
  8. If you land a Q on Lee Sin, you must take it. No exceptions.
  9. Riven is an annoying champion, but she is sexy so we like her anyway.
  10. Yasuo is also annoying, but he is not sexy so we hate him.
  11. Better Nerf Irelia.
  12. No matter how close the battle, it was easy. 12.1 ggez
  13. Bard is love. Bard is life.
  14. If rito nerfs your main, they don't understand balance.
  15. If rito doesn't nerfs anyone who is not your main, they don't understand balance.
  16. Report noob support.
  17. Trinkets are free.
  18. Warding is the support's job.
  19. Veigar is a little evil.
  20. Praise the sun. 20.1 Praise the moon. 20.2 Those who praise the moon are heretics. 20.3 heresy is underrated.
  21. Demacia.
  22. DEMACIA!
  23. Noxus?
  24. DEMACIA!
  25. Han shot first.
  26. Anime was a mistake. Much like me.
  27. Yordles are not sexy. No exceptions.
  28. Miss Fortune is always sexy. No exceptions.
  29. The Urgod is the most beautiful of all.
  30. Nothing is original.
  31. Nothing is original.
  32. Everything said in Falconshield's "This is War" series is canon.
  33. It's okay to call Morgana "mommy".
  34. Nobody likes Zoe.
  35. Every time you get a kill with Rek'Sai, you MUST say "Rek't" in all chat, no matter the situation. 35.1 If you die to Ezreal, you must say "The Struggle Ezreal"
  36. If you eat broccoli, you become Faker.
  37. T
  38. S
  39. M
  40. NA can't win worlds. No exceptions.
  41. Teemo is why we can't have nice things.
  42. Miss Fortune is not a support.
  43. If you rush deathcap, you are not a support. No exceptions. 43.1 Unless you are Lux. Or Brand.
  44. The Unbenched Kench is the Deadliest.
  45. Malphite hard counters Camille, as rock > scissors.
  46. The only ship that is acceptable is Ahri X Sona. For scientific reasons.
  47. Everyone can be shipped with Ahri.
  48. If you have no AP scaling, don't build AP. No exceptions. 48.1 Unless you are Wizard Garen.
  49. If you got banned, it was probably unfair. Better make a post about it.
  50. Do not chase Singed.

130 Comments

Eedat3/4/2019, 12:34:35 AM28 votes

51 If you lose lane, it is always the jungler's fault. No exceptions. 52 No matter how close it was, it was not even close baby. 53 Assassin mains sniff their own farts. 54 Ahri always needs buffs. No exceptions.

  • 54.1 Ahri always needs a new skin. No exceptions. 55 You can't killean the Zilean. No exceptions.
4 Step Cadence3/4/2019, 12:31:06 AM26 votes

You must say "Perfection!" after every quadrakill you get while playing Jhin. No exceptions.

AM Trick3/4/2019, 12:20:51 AM15 votes

Beautiful.

Catffeine3/4/2019, 4:18:37 AM13 votes

Rule 34 should've been "If a new champion is revealed, there will be porn of it within four hours."

DuskDaUmbreon3/4/2019, 12:24:28 AM9 votes

5 . Even if you have definite proof otherwise, Garen is in that bush.

FTFY. Come on, Laughing fish. You can't make silly mistakes like this.

General Matty3/4/2019, 3:55:33 AM5 votes

[{quoted}](name=Laughing Fish,realm=NA,application-id=Ir7ZrJjF,discussion-id=Jnj2NPpU,comment-id=,timestamp=2019-03-04T00:17:00.548+0000)

  1. Yordles are not sexy. No exceptions.

https://i.imgflip.com/1ci2th.jpg

lies

Ahri Baka3/4/2019, 2:39:25 AM5 votes

It's kinda funny how is Ahri is shipped with everyone You can find Ahri Hentai/Yuri with Literally every single champion in the game , even x Warwick or Wukong

Solargeo3/4/2019, 1:02:45 AM4 votes

No the only ship is Garen X Katarina. God King Garen Approves. All hail God King Garen!

Electro5223/4/2019, 5:12:40 AM4 votes

You forgot one.

"Never tower dive a Shen."

Thunder Dreamss3/4/2019, 2:36:05 AM4 votes

Evelynn is always MIA.

Altho I guess now that's only after 6.

Autrah Fang3/4/2019, 12:59:35 AM4 votes

[{quoted}](name=Laughing Fish,realm=NA,application-id=Ir7ZrJjF,discussion-id=Jnj2NPpU,comment-id=,timestamp=2019-03-04T00:17:00.548+0000)

3 Report the jungler. No exceptions. 3.1 Unless you are the jungler, than report your ADC.

What about the support?

16 Report noob support.

Oh, there it is. [slayer-pantheon-thumbs]

Livin like Riven3/4/2019, 3:02:32 AM4 votes

35.1 reminded me of when I was playing Ezreal and I had an aftershock Malphite support, and Ezreal wouldn't shut up about how "it's totally that rock's fault" because I kept missing Q's, was pretty funny so I'll add some of my own.

35.2 When sniping someone with an Ivern Redemption and cashing in on that sweet fat stack of gold, and your teammates spam ping you mia for KSing, you have to type "Iverned this"

35.3 When you finally oneshot that Lux support who poked you all laning phase, you have to type "League of Legends: De-Lux Edition"

Bonus one liner, comedy gold:

What did Kled do when Anivia walled off his ult path?

He SIRKLED around!

Heretic Lunari3/4/2019, 1:39:46 AM3 votes

If you praise the sun, you deserve to have your name written in Pyke's list.

Kitsuki053/4/2019, 4:00:15 AM3 votes

You have to make fish puns as Nami

LyLaq3/4/2019, 4:03:44 AM3 votes

Brand should be building Ability Power, even if he has no kills. Report him

Lord Kagetane3/4/2019, 12:06:10 PM3 votes

Nah i'm main teemo and i agree he's pure evil, and that's why i love that champ edit: it's not a lie!!!

Terozu3/5/2019, 6:05:06 AM3 votes

5.1 Garen being plainly visible is not proof.

SuperSaiyanPepe3/8/2019, 12:50:32 PM2 votes

How do I achieve the way of mastering Wizard Garen ? :O

Eternal Torment3/4/2019, 2:26:28 AM2 votes

You forgot one 51. League of Legends is therapy, and Mundo is your anger-management stress ball. You take it out on him.

ModWulf Helhammer3/4/2019, 1:52:27 AM2 votes

Number 4 should be "Liquid"

Saevum3/4/2019, 2:14:51 PM2 votes

5.1 - Unless you have definite proof otherwise, Ivern spawns Garens.

QmegaSquadVeigar3/4/2019, 3:59:26 PM2 votes

IS THAT A SHORT JOKE?

Pals Before Gals3/4/2019, 4:09:37 PM2 votes

So does that mean I will always win as Camille against Papercraft Nunu/Anivia? Asking for a friend here.

Gentleman Gems3/4/2019, 10:38:26 PM2 votes

[{quoted}](name=Laughing Fish,realm=NA,application-id=Ir7ZrJjF,discussion-id=Jnj2NPpU,comment-id=,timestamp=2019-03-04T00:17:00.548+0000) 9. Riven is an annoying champion, but she is sexy so we like her anyway.

Speaking of Sexy Riven, the Chroma's for her Battle Bunny Skin have different legging patterns

Just an interesting fact, that's all >->

Karunamon3/5/2019, 12:17:37 AM2 votes
    1. AP Riven is not a thing. Stop trying to make AP Riven happen. It's never going to happen.
    1. Always ban Yasuo
    • 57.1) Unless the guy hovering him has first pick
    • 57.2) Even then, you should probably ban him anyways - it's for their own good.
    1. Teemo might be cancerous, but there is far, far worse.
    1. If you lose twice in a row, take a long break. You are tilted.
    • 59.1) The degree you're tilted is inversely proportional to how tilted you think you aren't.
    • 59.2) If you have to ask if you're tilted, you're tilted.
    1. It is part of the summoner's code that you must use "rito" instead of "riot" when complaining about any aspect of the game. People have been banned for forgetting to do this.
    1. If you say "ggez", you are a terrible person.
    • 61.1) Even worse than Teemo.
    1. Star Guardian Urgot is not a thing.
    • 62.1) Never say never
    • 62.2) Only Sith and Demacians deal in absolutes
    • 63.3) But "Star Guardian Urgot is not a thing" is a thing
    1. Moderators are [removed by moderation]
    • 63.1) The previous comment wasn't actually removed by moderation
    • 63.2) Or was it?
    • 63.3) Moderators have no sense of humor
    • 63.4) Disregard that, this poster is a dirty Teemo main
    1. The likelihood of boards breaking your post's formatting is proportional to how much effort you put into formatting your post
    1. The likelihood of the player behavior boards producing a constructive outcome for anyone who posts there is roughly equivalent to the chances of C9 winning Worlds
    • 65.1) Other things with similar probability include:
      • 65.1.1) Getting a new balance team
      • 65.1.2) Yasuo or Zoe ever being meaningfully reworked to become less irritating
      • 65.1.3) Bots and cheaters being removed from the game permanently
      • 65.1.4) That guy who told you to get cancer and kill yourself being removed from the game permanently
      • 65.1.5) Annoying rants interspersed into humorous meme posts being removed from the boards permanently
      • 65.1.6) You, the person reading this, reaching challenger
JustDonnyy3/4/2019, 3:52:35 AM2 votes

Amazing.

Celestial Lion123/4/2019, 3:45:41 AM2 votes

Veigar is a little evil. Veigar IS THAT A SHORT JOKE

Nintenguy03/5/2019, 2:59:28 AM2 votes

You forgot the holy trinity of top lane rules.

"Don't fight Renekton." "Why are you fighting Renekton." "Stop fighting Renekton."

Terozu3/5/2019, 6:04:51 AM2 votes

5.1 Garen being plainly visible is not proof.