A Harrowing Tale of Tilt

Gather around the Cloud Drake and prepare yourself, for this Tale is not for the faint of heart.

It all starts with your first solo que game of the day. You're feeling good, well rested, ready to relax and enjoy league.

It is at this point you remember that league is not meant to be enjoyed.

You win your first two games, success! Finally reaching that promotional series you've been striving for, huzzah! You even win your first game. It is then you see your jungle lock in Yasuo. "Fine" you think to yourself, "I'll just deal with it, no big deal!". Even when the Yasuo dives bot lane turret at level 2, you bite your tongue and fight on. Perhaps it was merely a fluke, and on his screen there was a minion wave there, and he wasn't at 22 hp before entering the lane. This things happen after all. You managed to snag back some of the lead when you notice that your Karthas just died trying to solo the rift and level six. You try your best to reason with them in chat, calmly shot call and get the game back on track, and this is your first mistake.

You forgot, reason and logic are the equivalent of snorting poro droppings to your average solo que player. You've done nothing but draw their wrath! You try to keep the toxic beast inside you under lock and key as the 1/44/0 yasuo jungle with heal ignite tries to explain to you why you are the reason you lost. Statistics, positioning, strategy, they'll hear none of it! After all, they are the great Xx_YasuoFakerMain201769_xX, the greatest player on earth! No they haven't bought their account, why do you ask?

You take a break, breathe, and reset yourself. Perhaps the worst part about having the gun turned on you in the chat was that not only had you done rather well, but you meant nothing but good intentions when you tried to talk to your team. Ah well, cant win em all right? Certainly not.

Because this game, it IS your fault. You didn't take a long enough break it seems, and have developed a complex that draws you in the direction of every single enemy skillshot you could possibly eat, with your face of course! The flame ensues but this time you are quiet, perhaps it hurts worse this time because you've earned it. Sure, it didn't really matter, as the nasus top is 0/0/0 and hasn't even backed to buy items yet, and the singed support is working out about as well as you'd expect, but you're still atleast partially responsible.

Its time for game three, and by this time, your mental state is beyond repair. Your mind is filled with visions of death, blood, rage, destruction, and teemo. You've become the very monster you swore you'd never be again. The full tilt solo que player. Wishes of horrible fates fly from your fingertips, you curse people to tortures unimaginable, such as being forced to watch the big bang theory from start to finish, only the words spoken are completely drowned out by Smashmouth, playing live behind you, and the only sound loud enough to hear from the TV being the studio audience. Yes, that is the depths of twisted sadism that has been brought forth by these games.

And then... the inevitable happens. Chat restriction. "Why?" you cry out in despair, you're not a toxic player! Surely not you! You swore to be better this time, but alas, it is true! It then dawns on you. It has come full circle. You have become, the great Xx_YasuoFakerMain201769_xX. And the player you told to go consume his mother's spaghetti, is you. It's a cycle, a vicious storm of never ending tilt! If only you had summoned the powers of the omnipotent /muteall command... but you didn't... and now Teemo's Cycle begins anew once more.