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In a constant state of anxiety and depression as of late...

w1shing 0n stars·4/19/2018, 3:52:49 PM·1 votes·675 views

Just thought I'd make a thread on GD about this, as most other platforms, I feel like I haven't been able to vent fully.

League's been a good distraction as of late, regardless of the state of the game. But my mind just keeps wandering back to what I'm currently going through:

  • Parents are fighting right now, and have been together for 11 years... but it looks like aside from fights in the past, this time around, there is no way that they will be able to work it out.
  • The above meaning that we have about a month (the mom and i) to find a new place, one that will accept animals and one that she can afford for the time being.
  • Also recently trying to find a new school to attend, being that I got kicked out of my old one and that I want to finish up my AA and then go for my BA in English.
  • Trying to get my state ID/Drivers License and having to practice for the driven portion if I want to renew my license... but it's been 4 years since I've driven.
  • Possibly having to get a job (I've never held one down because of my Social Anxiety Disorder... I've never been able to function correctly in a work setting or on campus without being on medication... and because I was focusing on school full-time)
  • Seeing my Mom cry constantly because of our situation is probably the worst thing of this all... I wish I could do more to help her emotionally, but I feel like trying to get involved in their affairs would make things worse.

I apologize for laying this all out on the forums, but like I said, I was just hoping that someone would listen and or tell me that it was going to be okay. I don't want to pester my parents for this kind of support, and the only way I've been helping myself is by drinking myself silly every night to temporarily forget all that's been going on... of course by drowning myself in League too...

[zombie-nunu-tears]

2 Comments

Erusaurus4/19/2018, 4:04:19 PM2 votes

Hello friend.

As someone who has recently gone through depression (and still is, my situation is just starting to get better), I just want you to know that you are a strong person, you'll get through this, and and it will be okay. Don't apologize for sharing your emotions with us. Even if you don't know us, I bet that a lot of people are in the same boat, and it may seems like nothing, but sometimes, finding people who share the same experience can be really useful to feel better about ourselves, because you are not alone. If you want to talk more to someone about this, know that I'm here. Stay strong friend.

TheRiddum4/19/2018, 4:13:36 PM2 votes

Things are going to be hard....Divorce and seperation is hard to deal with especially as a young person like you who has a lot of pressures. As someone who saw my mom and step dad and sister and brother in law go through divorce my best advice is that it will get better. I am married now and own a home with my wife but let me tell you when i turned 22 and shit started hitting the fan, life was hard for a few years..i too fought depression. Had a hard time being hopeful, didn't even want to try and date because i thought they would all end up bad. It will get better, focus on improving yourself and supporting your mom because that's all you really can do right now. I don't your parents situation but i know my mother and sister are a lot happier now having left those relationships, they both weren't treated very well.

life is full of moments like these that just put you on your ass and force you to take a different perspective on things, this is where you gain wisdom. You'll make it through the storm starry skies..just keep your head up.