An Attempt at a Better URF

All cooldowns (Summoner spells, and normal spells), channels, delays, death timers, and cast times are capped at 90% reduction. (Overall speed increase is literally everything mentioned here) Missile speeds are increased by the same amount. Damage over time spells are affected by this speed increase at the same rate. Base attack speed on all champions lowered to .625. Attack speed cap is now 5.00. All mana and energy costs are removed. Health costs are half of what they were before. Additional Critical Strike Chance beyond 100% Critical Chance is converted to Critical Damage. Yasuo gains half as much from this. Movement speed soft caps removed. Turrets can now move and use items. Jungle camps can now move around and indiscriminately attack things. Jungle camp cooldown timers mirror the overall death timer speed of champions times 3 due to a significant power increase. Heal Embargo and Shield Overload are removed. Fixed cooldowns are now properly affected. Runes and masteries are disabled. All items EXCEPT the below against your champion gives +5% tenacity initially and grants 10% more for each additional cc. +25% Tenacity. Experience gain is on par with the Crystal Scar/Ascension In the event none of this actually solves the issue, surrender vote has been reduced to 7:30. Passively gain stats after 1 minute (champions only): +6 AP every 15 seconds +3 AD every 15 seconds. +25% attack speed every 12 seconds. (Capping at 10 minutes) +2% “overall speed increase” every 15 seconds. (Capping at 10 minutes, specifically 80%) +5 movement speed every 15 seconds. +1% Critical Chance every 10 seconds.

Underlying reasoning: With the current URF, you have champions with low base cooldowns and bigger damage dominating the meta as they can effectively spam their abilities with relatively instantaneous effect in terms of damage and/or crowd control. Other champions could hypothetically do this, but still take time due to any cast times, channel durations, or even delays.

The scalings were used to make the game ramp up over time and remove the need for traditional items, runes, and masteries. The death timers were specifically lowered over time because the win conditions have changed from destroying the enemy nexus to… something different (as explained below). Additionally, turrets are no longer something you can really turtle under as they move around. They all now spawn inside your base, and can move around on your side of the map.

Win Conditions: Get points from doing quests, and random objectives that appear every 2 minutes. Completing a quest or objective grants URF Points which are used to purchase items for yourself. Upon one team completing 300 quests and objectives, they win!

Due to my unwillingness to actually complete the quests or objectives at this time, essentially the quests would be based on in lore relationships and factions, and objectives would be simply eliminating enemy champions or jungle monsters.

Summoner Spell Upgrades: (Note: All the Cooldowns are the same as the original)

Palisade: (Barrier Upgrade) Blocks 3 attacks or Spells for the first 3 seconds, then grants a shield worth 25%-50% of your maximum health for 10 seconds.

Clarity: Disabled.

Cleanse: Look at Mikael’s Cauldron.

Cripple: (Exhaust Upgrade) Forms a field of Exhaustion for 5 seconds that lowers the movement speed and attack speed of enemies by 60%, and inflicts the Grounded Debuff

Surge: (Flash Upgrade) Enhances self and all nearby allies’ dashes, blinks, or teleports’ distance by twice the amount. This gives a free Flash to any units that don’t have a blink, dash, or teleport while Surge is on cooldown.

Ethereal: (Ghost Upgrade) Can move through units, walls, and structures. Increases movement speed by 60%, and causes any enemy turrets or lane minions to completely ignore you. This lasts for 10 seconds. (This cooldown applies after the duration)

Renew: (Heal Upgrade) Heals you and an ally for 25% Max Health, and heals an additional 75% Max health over 15 seconds. This ignores any debuffs that would negatively affect the restoration part. Grants 30% movement speed for the first 2.5 seconds of the heal over time.

Smite: (Disabled) Why: It has to do with how the jungle was changed. Smite wouldn’t be very… dynamic? I don’t know how to really explain it other than that.

Omnipresence: (Teleport Upgrade): Allows you to teleport to any allied unit, including champions and structures, instantly.

New items:

Trinkets: I see you: Immediately reveal the nearest invisible (whether item, ability, or brush) champion near you in a 1500 unit range for 3 seconds. Cooldown: 9 seconds.

Hairspray: Reveals all traps in front of you in a 750 radius. If your champion has hair, it will also passively (for 60 seconds) reveal traps in a 250 radius from you. 1.5 second cast time, has 2 charges. Refills each time you go to spawn.

Clairvoyance (Sorry not Sorry): Reveals an area of the map for 5 seconds. Cooldown: 12 seconds

Vel’Koz’s Spare Eye: Upgrades from Clairvoyance Reveals stuff in an area, and follows the first target even through invisibility. Cooldown: 12 seconds.

Actual Items:

Morello’s Nerf Bat: UNIQUE URF Passive - No one expects the Nerf Bat: Any spell on an enemy reverses their restoration as damage over time to self. Heals damage enemies with this effect. This lasts for 3 seconds. This can apply to multiple people. This cannot apply to the same targets 5 seconds after the effect. This immunity duration diminishes all the way to 1.5 seconds relative to their ability to restore health.

Meddler’s Scorn: UNIQUE URF Passive - Scorn: Auto attacks cause targets to have ¾ as effective healing as you damage them, capping at 10 stacks. After the 10th stack, they are immune to the effect for 5 seconds. This immunity duration diminishes all the way to 1 second relative to their ability to restore health.

Zhonya’s Bling: UNIQUE URF Active - RUN AWAY!!!: Pacifies you, grants invulnerability, and gives +100% MS for 2.5 seconds. Afterwards, blow up for 200% AP or 300% AD as Mixed Damage (whichever scaling is higher) to all nearby enemies (500 unit radius) and self. Cooldown: 9 seconds after explosion.

Repertoire’s Orchestral Baton: UNIQUE URF Active - Musical Dissonance: All enemy units around you takes 10% Max Health True Damage and take 35% increased Magic damage. Cooldown: 9 seconds.

Needlessly Sharp Sword: UNIQUE URF Passive - Pierce: Causes all auto attacks to pierce through shields and invulnerability at a rate of 30% of the damage.

Groovylord’s Hextech VCR: UNIQUE URF Passive - Rewind: Causes the entire game to rewind by 5 seconds upon death. This can only occur once every 30 seconds (Even in the past). Cooldown: 30 seconds.

Edge of Angst: UNIQUE URF Active - ITS JUST A PHASE MOM!: Reflects all spells and spell effects back at any allies or enemies for 2 seconds. Cooldown: 6 seconds.

Beluga Whale’s Blubber: UNIQUE URF Active - Boing: Bounces auto attacks and on-hit effects back at enemies for 3 seconds. Cooldown: 8 seconds.

URF-Cannon: UNIQUE URF Passive - Trigger Happy: Every 3rd autoattack causes 3 additional hits to go along with the first one. Cooldown: 9 seconds.

Runaan’s Pet Tornado: Upgrades from URF-Cannon RANGED ONLY UNIQUE URF Passive - Spin 2 Win: If your attack speed is at least 3.50 or higher, then for 1.75 seconds, rapidly attack all enemy units within your attack range. Cooldown: 7 seconds.

Ghostcrawler’s Revenant: Upgrades from URF-Cannon MELEE ONLY UNIQUE URF Passive - Cleave: Every 3rd auto attack causes you and a mirror image of you to quickly (hit one unit every (1/(1+attackSpeed)) seconds) slash through enemies around you. This has no cooldown.

Guinsoo’s Thingamabob: UNIQUE URF Passive - Trinity: Turns 33% of your simultaneous physical and magic damage into true damage.

Hextech Fragmenter: UNIQUE URF Active - Split: For 3 seconds, causes some of your abilities to fragment into multiple copies of themselves. Cooldown: 12 seconds. This item currently is unfinished as I do not have the time to actually look at all the champions and change something about them, sadly.

Urf’s Spatula: Combines from Hextech Fragmenter and Phreak’s Secret Weapon UNIQUE URF Passive - Miracle: Your abilities have been enhanced by the power of Urf’s Spatula.

This item is merely the combination of the two above mentioned items. Since neither item actually works for the time being, it doesn’t actually do anything.

Unstable Dagger: UNIQUE URF Passive - Voracity: Each time you kill a unit, -15 seconds off of all spell and summoner spell cooldowns.

Coronach’s Dream: UNIQUE URF Passive - Edacity: Upgrades from Unstable Dagger: Grants an additional +1% “speed increase” every 30 seconds, capping at +10%. After +10% is achieved, this item is consumed and permanently gained as a passive.

Eleisa’s Return: UNIQUE URF Passive - Serenity: Increase healing and shield potency by 50%. After having this for 3 levels or 5 minutes, this item is consumed and the passive is increased to 100% and gained permanently.

Mikael’s Cauldron: (This replaces Cleanse) UNIQUE URF Active - Purify: Removes all debuffs, and for 3 seconds, gain +50% Movement Speed and debuff immunity for 1 second, that refreshes each time you get hit with anymore debuffs. This removes any immunities from any URF items.

Famine’s Katana: UNIQUE URF Passive - Craving: Each time you attack an enemy, +1% Lifesteal, and +1% Lifesteal after each hit (+2% at 2 hits, +3% at 3 hits… etc) until the 10th hit. For every additional target you hit, it is 1/n (n being number of enemies) as effective.

Will of the Ancients: UNIQUE URF Passive - Soul-sucking: All spells heal for 60% of the base damage before scaling of the ability. For every additional target you hit, it is 1/n (n being number of enemies) as effective.

Warmog’s Daisy Dukes: UNIQUE URF Passive - Sustenance: Killing enemy units gains +300% Health Regeneration for 3 seconds. This is doubled for Epic monsters, Structures, and Enemy Champions.

CertainlyT’s Lament: UNIQUE URF Active - Sorrow: Gives a target a bunch of status effects that prevent them from doing anything for 3 seconds. Cooldown: 12 seconds. (Gives Silence, Suppress, Root, 100% Grievous Wounds, -100% incoming damage, and -100% outgoing healing). This cannot occur on the same target once every 36 seconds.

Spooky Blade: UNIQUE URF Active - Spook: After a 2 second channel (and an obvious animation), force all units, allied or enemy, to run away from you in fear, at twice the movement speed for 4 seconds. Cooldown: 10 seconds.

Phreak’s Secret Weapon: UNIQUE URF Passive - Tons of Damage: Upgrades your champion’s ultimate in some way. Elise, Jayce, Gnar, Kled, Shyvana, and Nidalee currently are not affected by this. This item currently is unfinished as I do not have the time to actually look at all the champions and change something about them, sadly.

Shaco’s Clone Hat: UNIQUE URF Passive - Mercury Poisoning: Every 3rd crowd control on you is reflected back at the person who used it.

Orb of Confusion: UNIQUE URF Active - Commotion: Immediately swap every champion’s appearances in a 1000 unit radius at random. This affects enemy and allied champions. This is done randomly and lasts for 5 seconds.

Test of Time: UNIQUE URF Active - Ruin: Causes all traps in a 700 unit radius to rapidly decay on time or take 1 damage every 3 seconds for 9 seconds. Cooldown: 15 seconds after the duration. This doesn’t affect things that don’t have a health bar, or traps that came from a champion ultimate.

Shroud of Invisibility: UNIQUE URF Active - Vanish: Makes you Camouflaged for 5 seconds. Cooldown: 10 seconds.

Turret Items: (This list is incomplete; these are all the ideas that I could come up with)

(Inherent) Scrambled Eggnivia: UNIQUE URF Passive: Turrets revive 20-10 seconds after being destroyed.

Nexus Figurehead: UNIQUE URF Passive: All turret damage is pure damage.

Lasers!: UNIQUE URF Passive: Replaces the standard turret fire with a Laser.

Kamikaze!: UNIQUE URF Passive: When this turret takes lethal damage, then it will suddenly blink to the nearest enemy champion (in 1000 units) and blow up for 2000 true damage. Cooldown: (5*deathtimer)

Hot Potato: UNIQUE URF Passive: Turret shots bounce from enemy unit to enemy unit doing +50% damage if it kills an enemy. This stops bouncing if there’s either no enemy unit within 300 units or after 15 bounces.

PANIC!: UNIQUE URF Passive: If there’s at least 10 enemy units (neutral or otherwise), immediately launch all of them 2500 units away. Cooldown: 20 seconds.

True Sight: This unit can see invisible units.

Nexus Traits: (This list is incomplete; these are all the ideas that I could come up with)

Look, don’t touch: Invulnerability and untargetability.

Minion Ballistae: Approaching enemies (within 500 units) get pelted with minions, dealing 100% of the minion’s HP as True Damage. Launches 2.5 per second.

Congratulations, you get NOTHING: Upon an enemy unit touching the fountain, immediately launch it all the way back to their fountain.

Enhanced Minion Ballistae: Approaching enemies with invulnerability get pelted with super minions, dealing 150% of the minion’s HP as Pure Damage. Launches 5 per second.

True Sight: This unit can see all invisible units.

Cruel: This unit will target you even if it’s suppose to ignore you.

Jungle Camp Changes:

Due to my unwillingness to actually attempt at giving these actual numbers and abilities, I will instead give a glimpse of how it’s suppose to kind of work. Please do note, even with URF abilities and items, I still mention it taking 3+ champions to take down a camp for very good reasons. The Rift Scuttler is not affected by any of this, and there remains 2 in their respective places. Yes, as the camps move around they WILL attack the turrets that are moving about the jungle (and probably will destroy them). The turrets act as deterrents for people trying to solo things.

In order for this to work, the map landscape has to change around a bit. Lanes get destroyed (it’s part of the reason why the Nexus launches minions at you). Elemental Dragons are removed, but all other types of camps are retained. Blue buff has been repositioned to the top corner, and Red buff to the bottom corner. The Top and Bottom Lanes are blocked off at the edge of the corners and where the base becomes the lane (per se).The mid lane suddenly got flooded except at the center where it’s kind of… roughed and destroyed terrain.

The four jungle camps, Raptors, Krugs, Murk Wolves, and Gromp are all in 4 different portions of the map; Gromp in the bottom left, Raptors in the bottom right, Murk Wolves in the upper right, and Krugs in the upper left. This means one team has more convenient access to 2 camps the other one doesn’t. These camps have been modified so that they’re much harder to kill and take the effort of at least 3 allies to defeat. Blue and Red Buffs are also similar to this effect with some slight difficulty increments. All of these mentioned camps will now move around and aggro to any nearby champions. Blue Buff will move around the top side river and its abode in the upper corner, with Red Buff moving around on the bottom side river and its lower corner. The four jungle champs will move around in their quarters of the map, but never go into the river. The Rift Herald and Elder Dragon now take an entire team to kill and are on par with how Baron Nashor normally is in normal SR. Baron Nashor has taken the ridiculous meter up to 11 and requires at least all champions to try to kill. I imagine Baron having more, and much more powerful abilities (like flinging a champion off the map, or something to that effect).